Do most women experience baby blues after giving birth?

I’m a guy, and I don’t even have kids. But from what I remember from my mother (post birth from my younger siblings) and what I’ve been told from others…. Those types of feelings/emotions, are at least somewhat common.

First of all, talk to your OB’s office, they should have some sort of referrals for counseling services. Post-partum depression in varying degrees is not uncommon at all, but needs managing. Secondly, if you’re not nursing and have no intention of it, there will be build up that will be uncomfortable. Gently massaging your breasts in a warm shower will relieve some of the pressure, but not really slow down the drying up process. It might also help to prevent an infection. (That advice is 20 years old, I’m sure there’s newer info out there)

@FutureMemory There may be personal reasons that she’s not nursing her baby, it’s a nasty nasty minefield subject for women.

I think many do. For me, I’ve had severe postpartum depression with my first and, in fact, it didn’t start until 2 weeks after giving birth. I’d really recommend that you see a psychiatrist asap before it escalates. In my experience, things can go from baby blues to suicidality quite fast.

This was not an issue for me. And I loved breast feeding. The comfort factor was secondary.

I had the baby blues with all three of my children. Fortunately, it never rose to the level of postpartum depression, but I did face exactly what you are describing all three times. For me it lasted maybe a month with the first – longer with the second and third because I was extra exhausted from chasing around the older one(s) on so little rest. Most of my mommy friends have dealt with this as well and a couple have coped with postpartum depression.

I would certainly say that it is appropriate to see someone, especially if you are concerned that it will escalate. Other than that I recommend that you go easy on yourself. Take it easy physically and be incredibly patient with yourself. Don’t worry if the house is a mess or about anything else along those lines, your first priority is being a mom. Of course you love your little boy, but you are still getting used to him and to being a mom, so cut yourself all kinds of slack!

CONGRATULATIONS!

I agree with what @SuperMouse said.
It might not get any worse, but if it does see someone.
I found that when I was tired it got worse. Try to rest and have only supportive people around you.
You don’t need to be trying to please other people right now, so forget entertaining and trying to keep up with the things that you could before the baby was born.
Best wishes and Congratulations!

Postpartum depression is no joke. Speak to someone soon.

I would say about half of my girlfriends spoke of the baby blues after birth, one went through it really badly with her third child. Almost all my friends talk about being freaked that they are now responsible for this new little life. Anxiety was very normal, and feeling overwhelmed. My one very close friend said the day she brought home her first child was the scariest day of her life.

My mom never went through it, but her best friend after giving birth had to have her mom come and do everything for two weeks solid, or she thought she might have let the baby die. I don’t think that really would have happened, but she was so overwhelmed by her depression and apathy towards the baby she could barey get through the day with the baby there.

Give your hormones a little time to even out. If it gets worse, or doesn’t let up in a few weeks, maybe talk to a professional about it.

If your breasts are that painful, maybe call your doctor and ask if there is anything you can do. I would not wait to ask about that.

Sounds to me like you are very normal.

I suffered from it with my first and agree with the advice above to seek help. I read that with postnatal depression, your hormones can be so out of sync that help is necessary. Dont feel bad if this is medication. I took prozac and felt better.

I did not have it but it is certainly common as your hormones are all over the place, in addition to caring for a new baby. If you are not nursing, it would be good to express some milk or find a way to relieve the soreness. But also do look for some help from a counselor or your doctor. It may also help you a lot to have some baby free time regularly; wither by leaving your son with your husband for a few hours or a trusted relative. And -= make sure to sleep when you can!

I second @JLeslie‘s advice. While I didn’t have the baby blues—a lot of my friends did.
My OB actually warned me about it by explaining that “Type A” or driven/professional women are most at risk for it because we’re used to being able to “control” everything or working towards specific expectations—but babies don’t work that way and require flexibility (in the extreme).
I did have some odd emotions (which I attribute to hormones) after my first baby. I remember being absolutely sure cars would run us down on the walking path and being a bit over-protective..but nothing more. My OB said if ANYTHING you feel is impacting your ability to enjoy your time with your new baby to call right away. You don’t want to regret it after the time has gone by later..they do have lots of ways to help.

Last, as many others have said—new moms have sleep deprivation and hormones wreaking havoc with their emotions- so give yourself a BIG break. A bit of weepy-ness or sadness isn’t out of the normal.

I breastfed each of my kids..but can offer this tip for engorgement from when I weaned:
the old wives tale about cabbage leaves WORKS. If you can send your partner or a friend out for a head of cabbage and slip the leaves into a bra it does help. Also, wear very a TIGHT constricting bra..that will also help engorgement. Finally, whatever you do, do NOT express a little milk “just to ease the pressure” (if you have a breast pump, for example). It’ll just prolong your suffering as your body will make more milk.
Also, my sister (who also didn’t breastfeed) said her doctor was able to provide her with a medication that helped with engorgement. So it might be worth a call to your OB on both fronts.

The hospital where my wife gave birth offered a number of supports for new mothers. They had a nurse or midwife you could talk to about anything. They had a lactation consultant. In addition, I think that hospitals can put you in touch with Doulas or other assistants who can help you with dealing with postpartum issues.

I think it is normal to deal with the baby blues, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore it or expect it to go away by itself. If you are having any trouble at all—even just a little depression, then get help. We are talking about a new life here—a new life dependent on it’s mother. The mother has to take care of herself, and so while it’s nice of you to get advice here, the real advice you need is from a professional—someone whose life is infants.

Just curious as to why you’re not breast feeding. Is that something that happens after a c-section?

@wundayatta No – it is perfectly fine to breastfeed after a C-section. I did it twice and it really made me feel better about myself.

I tyhink you’re just foine, and yes, it IS normal to have mild PP depression as there are many changes taking place in a multitude of areas.

Talk with your doctor next appt. and about medication to dry up your breast milk, there is an injection and REST as much as you can.

When I had my daughter I was ecstatic too, super hyped up for days and then the tired crash came on. She was 6 weeks old before she slept a 7 hour night and THAT is what a lot of PP depression is about…exhaustion messing with everything.

I think you are fine, don’t get all OCD about every little thing, enjoy your baby!
I trust you are insightful and self aware enough from all your other questions that you will ask for help, if, for some reason you feel worse.

BUT…..get ready for a lot of sleepless weeks and be aware that will effect your well being too. :-)

I’ve studied some Child Development. Your body, having gone through such immense stress is coming “back to earth” with your mindset. Which is to say, you are probably just slowly taking in the reality of going to raise this child and him be your own for eternity. Try and think positive! And self sacrifice is a must, think of what is the next step, but don’t let it just sit there and clutter in your mind. Write these things out, such as the case with any goal, anything written is much more likely to be done.

“Feelings of anxiety, irritation, tearfulness, and restlessness are common in the week or two after pregnancy. These feelings are often called the postpartum or “baby blues.” These symptoms almost always go away soon, without the need for treatment.”

From the NIH

Not to worry unless you develop Post-partum depression. You can read about that at the same source, but it is not likely that you have that so don’t worry.

@wundayatta No, I just made the personal choice not to breast feed. I have my reasons.

It is common and eventually will pass.

Enjoy your new born and you’ll forget about it really soon.

I would say some level of feeling a little blue to outright depression is more the norm than not having any emotional/psychological impact. So you are perfectly normal. The advice to seek professional help is wise. It does no harm to alert your doctor/nursing staff of how you are feeling so they can monitor how you are going. Feel no shame if you do need some form of medication to get through the next few months.

On a more practical note, don’t be too hard on yourself at this time. Many women try to be superwoman and have a perfect baby, house, get back in shape. Be kind to yourself. You and your baby are the priority right now. If the baby sleeps, you sleep. Get plenty of rest. Eat healthy food. Go for a walk with the little one if you can. Exercise (moderate!) can help you to feel better. If the house doesn’t look perfect, so be it. As long as you all have healthy food and something clean to wear and the bathroom and kitchen are okay, don’t stress. Don’t be afraid to ask your husband or your mum or sister/sister in law to help if you are feeling stressed.

Be sure though, this will pass.

I remember feeling somewhat bluesy for a few days, not immediately following birth but maybe in the second week, I had a strong feeling of wanting someone to look after me, I was married at the time and receiving lots of support from my partner, the feelings were totally unrelated to the reality of my situation but they passed in a few days I am happy to say, I hope the same will be true for you.

When I was still delivering babies, here’s what I would tell women who were heading home from the hospital or birthcenter:

There are major hormonal changes going on in the first few weeks, plus sleep deprivation. Most women experience at least a couple days of feeling very emotional, overwhelmed and might find themselves crying over things that normally wouldn’t get to them. That’s normal and OK.

BUT. If weeks are going by and you’re still crying most of the time, or if you can’t sleep at night because you’re worrying about yourself or the baby, or you’re having thoughts of hurting yourself or the baby, it’s beyond what you and your family should try to manage on your own. You should call us, because there are things we can do that will help. And if it’s feeling like an emergency to you, it’s OK to call in the middle of the night.

Great advice @MagsRags perfectly said.

@ItalianPrincess1217, hope you will give us an update on how you are feeling?

My wife didn’t. And the crackers for her morning sickness hadn’t work either.

@Bellatrix I’m feeling much better. The sadness only lasted a few days. I had a lot of support from my mother for those few crappy days. She offered to spend the nights with the baby and I that we would be alone because my s/o works nights. That seemed to help the most.

@ItalianPrincess1217 Great to hear!

Wonderful, wonderful to hear and a great time for bonding strongly with your own mother.