@carinstander I still think you are confusing what the meaning of muse actually is. Yes, a muse does inspire, but inspiration often does not come easy, and often does not come from a kind, gentle place. I’ve never heard of anyone tapping inspiration effortlessly. Some times it comes with no warning, other times it comes and goes randomly, sometimes people try to force it violently, and other times it comes only once in a lifetime. The muse herself (or in some cases himself) doesn’t play much of a part, except for randomly being the person who became the muse. Muses are recognized they aren’t made, nor can one make oneself into a muse.
Other creative people don’t even have muses at all, because their creativity stems from something else. People can play into it, but most creative people’s inspiration comes from all over the map.
Having a loving supportive spouse is helpful and wonderful, but the creativity usually doesn’t spring from that relationship per se. A helpful, calm, supportive spouse can help to keep a creative person from “running off the rails.” It’s also not true that all or even most creative people are out of control hyper-emotional people.
So even if you are the best friend and lover of a particular creative person, and you share everything, and you are mentally connected, it doesn’t mean that you will ever be his muse, or that he even needs a muse. Those concepts are simply two different things.
I hope that you would strive to be someone’s best life partner, the best that you can be rather than to strive to be a muse. A good life partner is loved and respected and cherished for being a good partner and a good person, a muse is only good for being inspirational for as long as the creative person finds her to be an inspiration. It could be for a day, a year or a lifetime, but that muse doesn’t need to be a good person, or a thoughtful person, or a kind person, or even a nice person to be a muse. Being a muse is a completely random state of being and not something you can choose to be or work hard at to maintain. And it’s extremely rare.
Being a good wife, or life partner, on the other hand is definitely something that you can be good at, and strive to be better at and that ultimately makes the creative spouse a better person. Might not make him a better artist, but it does make him a better person.