Heard the Latest Neutrino Joke?

I already read that on the Internet two days from now. :-)

Either that’s so lame I don’t get it, or it really jsut isnt a joke at all.

Ahh, after some thoguth I had a bit of a lol, not bad.

Two atoms walk into a bar, one says “I think I lost an electron”. The other says “Are you sure?” The other replies “Yes, I’m positive!”

Can’t get much lamer than that, yours is clever at least.

Here’s my go-to joke.

It had to do with DesCartes being asked if he wanted fries with his hamburger.  “I think not,” he said, and instantly vanished.

@gailcalled Aren’t you putting Descartes before the horse?

@janbb Damn you penguins are quick on the draw… AMAZING mind you have jan!

@janb; I amb, she said, in metered verse.

Or do I mean Don’t mess with Mr. Inbetween?

This is the best I could find…

Why did the chicken cross the road according to William J. Broad:

“The crux is that the vast majority of the poultry in the
universe seems to be missing.”

I must be slow tonight. Who is William J. Bond? And why is this funny?

And this one too…

Why did Einstein cross the road?

To get away from Niels Bohr. But when he got to the other side Bohr was
there also.

For a real sweet time, call C6H12O6.

Clones are people, two!

Chemistry professors never die, they just smell that way.

@gailcalled He has to do with meat, specifically poultry production practices and agriculture.

It is in reference to a book of his called “Technology and culture.”

It’s funny because of the reference to the book in comparison to the fact that it is the chicken crossing the road scenerio. Which couldn’t really be any more specific to probably anyone other than Frank Perdue?

Gravity brings me down.

Black holes suck!

@GabrielsLamb: It must be the flu. I still don’t get it. And the Einstein one makes better sense if you use Max Plank (discoverer of quantum theory) rather than Bohr, whose theory of the energy in the electron orbits were simpler and later disproven.

@gailcalled * Trust me it is one of the nerdiest things I have ever heard.

I found this in another forum:

A neutron walks into a bar and asks: “Hey, how much for a beer?”
The bartender says, “For you, no charge.”
Two protons are sitting in the corner, watching. One turns to the other and says, “Hey, that neutron got a free beer!”
The other replies, “Are you positive?”
A neutrino enters the bar and joins the other particles, looking very down in the mouth.
“What’s up with you?” asks the neutron.
The neutrino sighs and says, “I’ve just been kicked out of church.”
Shocked the others demand, “What for?”
“Apparently,” replies the neutrino, “I’m not supposed to have mass.”
Two grumpy quarks walk into the bar.
One says to the bartender, “I’ll have a double bourbon, straight, and my bitch here’ll have his usual Miller Lite!” and slaps the other quark hard on the ass.
The neutron leans over to the protons and whispers, “No need to guess who’s the top and who’s the bottom.”
Three hot electrons and a shiny photon enters the bar.
The bartender says, “Stuff this, I’m getting the manager! Hey, Pauli, we got a problem!”
Suddenly this huge Italian appears and tells all the particles to leave. When they start complaining, he yells “This is ‘Pauli’s Bar’ and I’m Pauli! If I say ‘no particles’, then it’s no particles! Get out, you’re all barred!”
Grumbling, all the particles leave the bar. Except the photon, who walks straight past Pauli and orders a drink!
“Hey!” says the bartender, “What about him?”
Pauli glances over to the photon, “Nah! That don’t apply to him!”

If Neutrino was the name of the Dutch railways it would be late.

Neutrino!
Knock knock
Who’s there?

A neutrino boyfriend: interacts weakly and is finished before you get started.

@flutherother Ha! That’s hilarous. All the above are great fun, but that’s an original from you, I’m guessing.