What do you say to someone who has a marble made in China lodged in their head?

“Have you lost your marbles?”

Lucky to have this in “social”,

Is something loose in the noggin?

One way not to lose your marbles, dad! After you stop laughing, of course!

What are you doing after the show?

Did the doctor use forceps or a simple, “abra cadabra” to remove it?

Any magician worth the rabbit in their hat should be able to get a chinese marble out of their ear. I mean seriously!

How about:
1) WTF were you thinking?
2) Is there anything else in there worth salvaging?
3) Hand over the rest of them right now!
4) You should have used ones made in the US!
5) Did they need to check the other orifices while they are doing this one?
6) Now you know why I did not follow in your footsteps.
7) Did these come from my Chinese Checker Board?

BTW, I think it is great that your Dad is a magician!

Maybe ask him some questions while only move your lips no sound.

Off-topic; Is a plastic marble different than a glass or agate marble? Less majestic, less worthy of pity, less useful as a souvenir in a display case?

@gailcalled Is a marble not by definition made of marble?

Read details, dear heart. I guess that he means a little round plastic bead.

..he put a little plastic marble that he had ordered from China…in his ear.

@gailcalled Aha, a plastic marble…......
Let me make a fool of myself a second time and say that that sounds oxymoronic to me.

Too true. Damn your Engish.

@gailcalled Yippie!!!!
Thanks.

Whatever I said I would say silently, simply mouthing the words, and eventually (after he asked me to speak up several times) I would appear to be shouting at him… and not making a sound.

That’s great! You made that marble totally disappear! What’s your next trick?

How about “Abracadabra!” (accompanied by your best cheesy sarcastic grin)

You could tell him the joke about the monkey and the pool ball…

A man had a monkey that he took into a bar. He claimed that the monkey would eat anything that it would put into its mouth. A few people took the bet, and offered things such as grapes, beer nuts and even cigarette butts. The monkey would pick up the object, stick it into his ass, then take it out and swallow it.

Most of the patrons were amused by this behavior, but they were all repulsed by what the monkey did first. One of them asked the owner, “Why does your monkey put the object in his ass before he eats it? That’s disgusting!”

The owner replied, “He had an unfortunate encounter with a pool ball that someone offered him three weeks ago. He was able to fit the ball in his mouth and even swallow it, but three days later he was in agony, and after he passed the ball he couldn’t walk for a week and a half.”

I don’t know how this applies to your dad, but maybe you can find a parallel somewhere.

How about:

“What did they do to remove it, blow in your other ear?”

I love your dad! How cool.

What were you thinking? When you were a kid, did you put a straw up your nose and have it come out your mouth? Ears don’t work that way.

Wow man, what the hell? I’d ask if they were okay, and if everything went well. I don’t think I’d be able to not laugh a little though.