What will you bring to the Fluther foodfight?

Water. It’s just so refreshing.

I’m filling the Aquazooka turbo charged squirt guns with prune juice, open wide!

Since three days my girlfriend is making fruit smoothies or just juice because that is seemingly healthy yuck….
I’ll bring a liter of the stuff.
Guess that is sticky!

I’m going to whip out my sausage

Ummmm….. I’m going to assume you mean “breakfast sausage”. :P

Be nice or I’ll fill the squirt guns with goose juice from the uncleaned pools. lol

Why is this making me feel a little sexy?

Pineapple upside-down cake!
On second thought, I don’t want to waste that.
Tomato soup! With olive oil in it! I’m flipping big ladles of it! It’s red that won’t come out, viscous and slimy! You’ll never get it off you!
So there!

Squid ink . . . mwahhhhhhh

Beer!

Jello shots! Squiggly, colorful, sticky, and afterward, body shots!

I’m throwing cans of ravioli at people.

Well, maybe not…a little violent. Daddy would you like some sausage?!

’‘rapes everyone with a big ol hotdog’’

You know this is all fine and dandy, us little amateurs having an epic food fight…but as soon as @Kardamom gets in this thread, we are all so dead.

@Dog ’‘purposely gets in the way’’

Peanut M&M’s. They are deadly when aimed at the correct area and zinged at someone. And of course there is the 5 second rule that if they only sit on the floor for five seconds, you can still eat them.

@Dog Thanks for bringing beer, but can we drink it instead of throwing it? It would be an awful waste…. :P

@WillWorkForChocolate Aye. Wise words.

I once ate a piece of chocolate cake I dropped on the floor and ate it on the floor because I was too lazy to pick it up. It was worth it.

@Michael_Huntington…dude.

The floor was clean!

<throws a chocolate cake in Michael’s face>

I’ve eaten stuff off the floor before. BUT I PICKED IT UP FIRST. XD

^She has her standards!

That reminds me of this Beavis and Butthead thing…

Butthead Hey Beavis. Once, when you went to the bathroom, I horked a loogie in your Coke, and you drank it.

Beavis No I didn’t Butthead!

Butthead Shyeah. You drank it.

Beavis Oh yeah? Well once when you went to the bathroom, I took a dump on your cracker, and you ate it.

Butthead I took the turd off and finished the cracker. What’s the problem?

XD

I’ll bring some motherf$#*#@$ TOFU.

Okay, I’m about to start throwing tonight’s leftover spaghetti! Duck unless you want tomato face!

How bout balloons filled with chocolate or whip cream.

Sling shots and brussel sprouts…;)

You should have looked first. I left grapes on your chair.

@blueiiznh

Haha slingshots with Brussels sprouts, man, those would hurt!

Creamed Corn.

@Neizvestnaya

Ewwww! Creamed corn has got to be the grossest food ever!

Sour grapes

Banana peels…!

@Hawaii_Jake I’m picturing some crazy slapstick moments now!

Chocolate pudding. And a baby pool.

I just want to know where the food fight is so I can run in the other direction.

slap ya all with a raw side of beef… nahhh that would be a waste… whack ya over the head with my Dad’s bottle of 35 year old gin.

Pea shooter with cat food kibble

Slipping and sliding in all this slop, someone is gonna get HURT! I haven’t drunk enough beer to enjoy this. I’m going home. Just be careful out there.

Breast milk!

I’m thinking a large funnelator and pumpkins or pineapples.

Wine, cheese, crackers, safety glasses, 2 raincoats and 2 lawn chairs.
I prefer to sit on the sidelines and watch the action while enjoying the company of any female who cares to join me.

And some bottled water and soap for cleaning up.

@Jeruba Ha, the joke’s on you. I saw your grapes and secretly slipped them into every pair of your shoes.

@Jellie ROFLMAO to breast milk..

Kippers, to slap you all with.

Donald Duck Orange juice, my fav. ;-)

Phasers on stun.

I have in my arsenal a selection of cake decorating pastry bags.

In one of the bags is Cilantro Hummus

In one of the bags is Lemon Aioli

In one of the bags is Spicy Cajun Barbecue Sauce

In one of the bags is Tex Mex Black Bean Dip

In one of the bags is Roasted Parsnip Puree

In one of the bags is Potato Cheese Soup

In one of the bags is Maple Bourbon Cream Cheese Spread

In one of the bags is Alfredo Cream Sauce with Sundried Tomatoes

And the last bag contains Eggnog Brandy Pudding

Jellies, select your weapon and commence squirting! Phhhhhtttttt!!!

“Commence squirting” Okay..it’s taking a HUGE amount of self restraint to not go with the “flow” of that comment. lol

I pick the Tex Mex Black Bean soup..very similar to the consistency of goose poo. hahaha

I thought @Kardamom response was another one of those spams we have been getting lately. I almost flagged it. LOL.

@Kardamom i first read that as commence squirting! Oh, nevermind, you did type that.

@WillWorkForChocolate, oh, thank goodness those weren’t slugs. Now I just need to find me a toe-licker.

I’d tell you what I melted into your chocolate pudding, but I’m too busy ducking @Kardamom‘s arsenal. She never does things halfway, does she? I’m on the parsnips.

Calling in an orbital bombardment of kimchi.

@Jeruba No, she never does. Perhaps we should team up with some nasty, sticky, foul-smelling concoction to slide between her sheets. We could also smear it on all her doorknobs…

But all that stuff she’s bombarding us with is so good. I think I’d rather just hunker down with a large bowl and spoon and catch what she’s firing. I’m not much of a warrior anyway.

This is true… In that case, I call dibs on the Eggnog Brandy Pudding.

Dude, today at lunch, I bought a chicken salad sandwich. When I opened it, this nasty smell of rot and death assaulted me. It was really horrid, that thing was way expired long before Vlad the Impaler was born. This thread cheers me up about that.

Also I knew @Kardamom would lay waste. She’s like a whole regiment of drakkars, but instead of raping and pillaging, these Vikings sail to your house and cook you stuff.

I think we can spare all the food made in airplanes and hospitals and also the potatoes in my school. That stuff bounces. We shall also lay waste to McDonald’s. BEGIN!

Oh God..I’ll bring the yellow Air China sausages I was served last year on my way to Taiwan. Gag! I was so freaking hungry, I only ate my soggy Mango and muffin. No yellow sausages.

You went to Taiwan? What’s it like over there?

@Symbeline

It was awesome. Good food, crazy giant city Taipei is, night markets everywhere, awesome beaches, and, best of all, it was Chinese New Year and you could buy the most outrageous fireworks! It was nonstop firecrackers for 2 weeks.

The fried duck heads were a turn off along with squid on a stick. lol

Squid on a stick? Eewww.

A mix of lima beans, beets, celery, and a few others I’m trying not to remember. It wouldn’t bother me one bit to dispose of that swill quickly. I can’t stand them. And, personally, I believe anything that is delicious and wonderful should not be used in a food fight. It makes the situation more vicious to bring what you don’t like.

@Mantralantis If we’re bringing things we don’t like, I’ll add lima beans, brussel sprouts, cauliflower and cabbage to my list!

I’m pulling out the single nastiest dish I know and hiding it in your wardrobe, fermented skate/sting ray.

Eewww! I’ll just call someone else in to deal with it…

@WillWorkForChocolate have fun buying a new wardrobe, the smell never comes out. :D