Are you more comfortable being unique or being similar?
I think that sometimes people want to be unique and special. They want to do something special and become famous for what they have done. At other times or other people want to be the same. They don’t want to stand out. They just want to belong.
Compared to others, where do you think you stand? Do you want to be more unique or do you want to fit in more? Whatever you want, are you comfortable that way? If you change between the poles, how often are you closer to wanting to be unique and how much time do you prefer to be similar?
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I am unique. Nobody’s like me or does things like I do.
I don’t like the attention though. I prefer to be the one from the dark.
I am unique and different, and I enjoy being unique and different. And I like that everyone I know is unique, that’s why I love them and they love me.
Unique, different, avant garde. I prefer to be me and not follow the crowd.
It’s kind of boring being normal and “fitting in”. That also stifles creativity and forward out of the box thinking.
I also foster my daughter to be independent and unique.
I think sometimes I am too independent to fit in except a social group of people I enjoy being with, at work I do find it sometimes to fit in but I try to keep it professional, but sometimes they like to be in a group instead.
Uniquely similar. That is…..fitting in with many unique people! But life dictates differently. You have to fit in where you can, or be a hermit.
I’m both: I’m unique, just like everyone else.
I just want to be me. To validate in my own heart, life, mind experiences that it is okay to be me. An individual.
Tricky question! My ego gets uncomfortable when its claim to distinctiveness gets questioned. It wants to feel different. But to live in service to my ego’s insatiable thirst for distinction is really quite miserable, overall. Better to let my ego whimper over in it’s dank cave and embrace life in its magnificent ordinariness.
I’m comfortable with being me.
Compared to others, where do you think you stand?
I’ve never met anyone quite like myself, have been frequently told I’m pretty unique, nor do I often remind people of others so observationally I guess I’m on the “more unique” side of the scale.
Do you want to be more unique or do you want to fit in more?
Neither concerns me beyond the value of each in any given situation. I’d rather more people share my views so which ever bucket you feel those two things put me in.
Whatever you want, are you comfortable that way?
Quite. I can’t really imagine wanting to fit in or striving to separate myself.
If you change between the poles, how often are you closer to wanting to be unique and how much time do you prefer to be similar?
I’ve pretty much always been this way, even back in grade school. I never wanted to fit in because that crowd made my teeth hurt and I never saw the appeal or value in being purposely different just to say you were or feeling the need to advertise it.
To a dispassionate outsider, I’m pretty sure that the human species would seem to have quite a uniform aspect to it. We like to think we’re unique, because we focus on our small differences, but generally most people have the same desires and motivations. I’m quite happy being the roughly the same as everybody else, and I feel a bit sorry for people who delude themselves that they’re fundamentally unique. You’re not, get over yourselves…
When I was a child, I wanted to be more like everyone else, so they wouldn’t tease me so much. As a young adult, I tried to dress/act like other people, but somehow they could always tell there is something different about me, so I finally gave up trying.
I was a born leader…..a funtime born leader. I smile and laugh about 95% of the time.
When I was born, according to my mother, they threw away the mold.
You only live one day at a time, so make the most of each minute.
I don’t think anyone on Fluther is similar to anyone else…
We’re an original crowd, here. :)
Wundayatta My apologies in advance if I don’t quite answer your question.
I do tend to go off on tangents sometimes
I think the uniqueness of each person is very real. We are all human (well, at least most Jellies are) so we have many things in common. We may share this or that characteristic or quality whether speaking of physical or mental attributes, personality type etc. But just as every snowflake is more or less white and rounded and has crystals, the form and shape and combination within the basic structure is what makes it unique. Just as a 10 cooks can use the same recipe and each one does something just slightly different that affects the taste of the soup, we play out our genetic hand, the upbringing we are blessed or cursed (or somewhere in between) to haveā¦Life hands us defining moments and in and through these moments we create ourselves. We are in a constant process of defining and redefining ourselves.
I often feel like I don’t really belong. I don’t want to be different, I do want to be true to myself. It’s very hard for me to agree with someone just to be agreeable. I usually chosoe to be quiet if I disagree and nothing is served by my being disagreeable. If someone asks my opinion then, yes, I will give it. Then if they don’t like it, well, that’s their problem. I try to get along with people and I feel like that shouldn’t be too hard, but sometimes it is. So I feel like being unique can be bad as well as good. There is this standard of what is normal and admirable that has nothing to do with what is ethical. I am just as guilty of applying my standards of what is weird or abnormal as the next person. I may think something is weird, but if it’s not hurting anyone, I say live and let live. (I can still think it’s weird, but I just keep my opinion to myself) A lot of gossip and maliciousness stems from this societal judging .
I like people who are eccentric. Some of these eccentricities are better appreciated from a distance however!
Am I unique? Yes. I wish I could express what is unique about me more. I find that to be one of the primary tasks of life. Hopefully I have something to offer that only I can offer. At any rate I occupy my spot in the universe and hopefully I’m not just taking up space.
I don’t like standing out or getting attention. Not that kind anyways. I’m much more comfortable being unnoticed. I’ve had my Goth years, in a big city with a bunch of other Goths, so that doesn’t count, and I don’t find that Goths are particularly unique, anyways. So that rules that out, for me anyways. Being similar is fine. I’ll be different in my head, assuming that what happens in there isn’t similar to what goes on in other people’s heads. Chances are it is, but maybe I stray away a little…:D
Doesn’t mean I jump band wagons or wanna fit in. I just do what I want, and what I want to do just happens to be pretty normal, least so far as I can tell.
I always wanted to be unique. But the longer I live, the less unique I find myself. Just for example, one might think that mental illness is pretty unique. Turns out you couldn’t be farther from the truth. All the emotional shit you feel is exactly the same as hundreds of others, right in your neighborhood! How depressing!
Except, it actually turns out to be comforting to find people who are like you. They, at least, can understand. I’ve learned that I’d much rather be understood than unique. I am really, really tired of being lonely. And I’ve been lonely for so long.
I’ve recently discovered some old letters from when I was 17. Turns out that I sounded pretty much the same then as I sound now. Ain’t that a kick in the head? I must be pretty damn stupid to be taking something like 35 years to solve the same basic problem. But maybe I’m not unique in that. I hope not.
@wundayatta As far as that’s concerned, you’re probably safe. XD
Good point too, about having other people similar to you that you can share shit with and talk about stuff and all. Looking at it this way, being unique would probably suck ass balls.
I am a unique little snowflake, just like everyone else.
Quite alike with @wundayatta‘s last response.
When I feel high, confident, I like to be unique. When I am low, I tend to be similar.very selfish, indeed.
Well, I am learning from God how to stay, how to live, how to come out of loneliness, and how to become happy, perhaps, to be like Chikoo seed. It looks like this.
The chikoo seed, though remains inside the fruit, it doesn’t get adhered to it, it’s not sticky. It comes out easily, and without taking anything (fruit pulp, fibres, etc.) along with it. Likewise, it is said that, as we live in this world, come across many people, things, that touch our mind, we (our minds) should not stick to anything. We should be present physically in and around this world, but mentally, we should be with God. That’s one of many ways to happiness.and come out of loneliness.
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