Asking a classmate out?
Asked by
Evolving (
26
)
November 4th, 2011
So there is this girl in my class in medical school, this will be my class for the rest of the coming years with the exact same people, and I have been there for over a year now, so even though it’s a big class (about a 100 students) everyone knows everyone, at least to a certain extent, and everyone has everyone on their facebook. The extent of my relationship with her is just the every day smile and “hi”, and some minor facebook interactions, we also have many friends in common, but these are neither my best friends nor hers. I don’t know if she’s seeing anyone but it doesn’t look like it. She is extremely friendly, so it’s not difficult to strike up a conversation with her, and I believe I have already left a pretty good impression.
Ok now the reason that scares me of doing something about this seemingly simple situation is that we are going to be in the same class with the same people for years, and I don’t know if I can deal with a rejection in such a situation, I also fear the downfall of having such a relationship in first place.
My plan of action is to take our everyday relationship to a higher level, and then maybe sometime ask her out casually, either with some mutual friends or to some other place where I usually meet some of my non medical school friends, and from there I’ll see what to do. I just don’t want to end up in the friends zone, or embarrass myself.
I want your input on the subject. Thanks in advance and sorry for the long text.
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8 Answers
What about asking her out as a friend and see if something else devlops… Say would you like to grab lunch/dinner (what ever meal is around that time you get out) after class.
You mean ask her out alone as a friend? Without being with some other friends? Wouldn’t that be a little ‘pushy’ ?
Why not have a small get together for the holidays and make sure she is included in the invite? Take the opportunity to get to know everyone a little better. The worst that can happen is you’ll have fun and make some lifelong friends.
Don’t think too much, go for it!
Better ask some o her friends first is she is dating someone [even if she doesn’t seem to be dating she can be doing it] and if she said anything about you to them.
Anyway it might be awkward at first but it’s gonna be alright even if she’ll say no.
@Evolving I don’t think its pushy if you strike up a conversation with her first. Ask her opinion about something that is going on in class as a start to the conversation. If you are talking to her already, asking her if she wants to continue the discussion after class over coffee, dinner, lunch or something simple is just showing you are enjoying the conversation and want to continue it with her. If its going to happen then it will happen when you two are alone, even if its at the end and you are leaving each other. While alone I would look for clues she’s interested in you as well, like leaning in, or touching an arm, the typical things that show someone is into you.
I agree with @creative1 & @bobby78. Just ask her out to lunch or a coffee. It’s a pretty normal to ask a classmate to hang out on a break.
Keep it casual and you can each decide if you want to hang out again sometime.
Ok thanks everyone, especially creative1, this was helpful, I’ll give it a try :)
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