NSFW - Would a man with performance problems break up a relationship?

I’d say it depends on the man. Frankly, I’d find that a little shallow and short-sighted.

First of all, there’s a lot more to a good relationship than just sex (or more specifically, penetration). It’d be silly to throw away an entire relationship over one component of it.

Secondly, there are oodles of solutions for erectile problems as well as other alternatives to penetration.

So, there could be other deeper problems and not just that then????

@ZEPHYRA yes, quite likely. Commonly, confidence problems. Or well, this could be a pretext. I can’t say without further info. But I agree with @cprevite .

Yes – I think so sometimes.

Certain medications could cause those type of problems also. I’d try to figure out the cause before I threw it all away.

No. IMO, that is an excuse. Search for another reason.

I don’t think it would be a conscious decision: “Let’s see, I have this problem, so therefore I’m going to break up with my SO.”

But he may falsely ascribe his sexual problems to his SO, for one thing. He may not understand that she may be the person most responsible for keeping him alive. He may also be frustrated at the problems and wear that frustration on his sleeve in a way that makes him impossible to live with.

People do all sorts of things for all sorts of reasons, which aren’t always obvious even to them, much less to the outside observer. (In fact, sometimes it is only obvious to outside observers. Other times, what is “clearly obvious” to outside observers is dead wrong.)

I think some men might do that.
They might feel so embarassed by it, the mere presence of the woman might cause him shame.
He might blame the woman. “If you were sexier, I wouldn’t have this problem.”
If the relationship was mostly based on sex, and the sex is gone, he might ditch the bitch.

The best way for a woman to handle an unexpected break-up with someone having this trouble, is to say loudly “So, you’re gay now?”

Sure, especially if he thinks it’s the partner he’s not responding to on some level. Lots of people would rather move on and hope the issue clears up rather than face what they feel is some failure, embarrassment or lack of control.

He might, if he also had self-esteem issues and lack of self-confidence. Or if he’s blaming himself or his partner for the problem.

It is totally possible. I am not even a man and I have a performance problem. It can really eat away at one’s self-confidence, especially if someone is being super understanding and accommodating. It seems easier to avoid relationships than to be in one where the problem seems magnified because it’s so focused on. It’s embarrassing and it can hurt… a lot. In a society where it seems like it’s so easy for everyone else to have sex without any problems, it can even cause shame.

I can see the strain this could put on a relationship but I don’t see why it couldn’t be worked on by both people in the relationship. It depends upon a myriad of factors and is not an either or situation by any means. If there’s openness, communication and honesty, then I believe it’s something a couple can most definitely come through.

It depends on the individual. Perhaps he feels so shamed by his problems he doesn’t know how to deal with them. Of course it would be better to talk to his partner and for them to work things out, but people don’t always do or feel what seems logical to everyone else. As @filmfann suggested too, he might have the sort of personality where he blames his partner for his problems. How old is this person?

Talking to a partner about issues like that can actually make things more awkward…

I mean if he doesn’t give a crap, sure. If someone cares more about denial than love, screw them anyway. Oh wait, you couldn’t. All the better.