Share a laugh with your fellow Jellies! What made you giggle today?

Finding Ketchup Troll’s history.

This post had me in tears this morning I was laughing so hard.

I giggled at @KatawaGrey’s reaction to this video I posted.

Well, I was telling my friend that I had intended to start a diet today, but I actually forgot and ate leftover refried beans for dinner. She asked if that was really so awful, and I said it might not have been if it weren’t for the sour cream and Shetland that I ate with them. (My phone auto-corrected “shells” to Shetland without me noticing.)
Gives new meaning to “I’m so hungry, I could eat a horse.” Eh?

Smelly Goat Tragedy! Smelly Goat Tragedy! I love Smelly Goat Tragedy! How versatile a phrase, I’ve already thought of ways to use it in sentences, and situations to which I can apply it. Thank You, Seelix, for Smelly Goat Tragedy!

Schadenfreude. It was one of those days!

Thank you, @JilltheTooth, for loving it so much!

It reminds me of something that happened a couple of years ago. I have a friend who works for Telus (a Canadian cell/cable/internet company). Telus is known for its commercials, which usually feature adorable animals and popular songs from years past. One of their ads featured jumping (but not smelly) goats, and the store was giving away reusable shopping bags with the goats on. A bunch of us were at this friend’s house, and he had a few goat bags lying around. I asked him for one, telling him how much I loved the goats and wanted a goat bag. That resulted in another friend calling me Goatbag for a few months. ;)

My friend was telling me about how he was texting his brother in Spanish and told him that ” I am positive you are a turd” translated. Then he showed me how it translated back into English. It said “I am positive that is the shit.”

(NSFW?)
Haha. First, my friend Kate was telling us about how starting tomorrow her dad is going to go to school with her, and sit in the back of all her classes. O.o Then she pointed out the window, to the hallway (Which is really just outside, because my school is just 12 portables) and said “There he is, talking to Susan.” then my friend Brittney said “He’s kind of hot.”
... He wasn’t. He was old, and all the hair from his head seemed to have migrated to his chest.

Then later, someone said someone was going to dress up as Batman. Then I said “Then I would have to rape him.” It got really quiet, and everyone just stared at me. O.o Then they all laughed. “I’m being serious. Batman is hot. I would hit that. In the Bat Cave. In the Bat Mobile, with Robbin present…”
They think I’m crazy now. :D

@AshLeigh Sis, I don’t really blame you for wanting to rape Batman. In fact, we could have a threesome.

@MilkyWay, isn’t that like incest? O.o Oh well, I don’t care. Lets do it. Haha.

@AshLeigh Um… yeah. Let’s just pretend we’re not sisters. For Batman.

I already did. This made me laugh. You have to be a techie to get it though.

Alright. Anything for Batman. ;)

My roomie got a jar of homemade jam for Christmas from a member of her family. It’s this dark orange looking jam thing. She hasn’t had any, the jar is left unsealed in our fridge. When I saw it I was like, Jesus Christ, what the hell is in that jar?? I mean it really looks freaky. Neither of us want to try it, and we’ve been making jokes about it ever since the holidays. Like, when eating dinner or wtv and engaging in the after work/school obligatory convos, one of us will say something retarded like, so, that jam not abusing you too much, is it?

But last weekend, I’m just sitting in my bedroom, fucking around online when…I hear a loud and hoarse voice; EEEEAAAAT MEEEE!! I startle and turn to my bedroom door… and all I see is my roomate’s arm holding the jar of jam, wiggling it around.

I still can’t stop laughing lol. I mean she got it out of the fridge and everything just to be funny. We had such a huge laughing fit.

I almost feel sorry for this jam. We should probably at least taste it already.

Go to this google maps link, and click on the woman: http://maps.google.com.br/maps?q=Rua+Flor-de-tipuana&ll=19.870837%2C-43.989161&spn=0.005842%2C0.010568&safe=active&hnear=R.+Flor+de+Tipuana++Santa+Terezinha%2C+Belo+Horizonte+-+Minas+Gerais%2C+31340–040&gl=br&t=m&vpsrc=0&layer=c&cbll=-19.870353%2C-43.989455&panoid=nR2WeCl4vUMSVgoTZNgBMg&cbp=12%2C300.07%2C%2C0%2C5.13&z=17

Had a really weird nightmare this morning. I was dreaming an advance race was coming to destroy earth because they thought us all savages. My husband had an space ship that was small and transfered me to a barren planet. I was afraid for the rest of my family and I did not want him to go. While he was gone I couldn’t bear the thought of living all alone on this dead planet without him. The planet was being bombarded with sonic sounds that destroyed anything moving. I could see it all happening. I wanted one more chance to tell him I loved him. Then they (the aliens) saw what my husband was doing and couldn’t believe he would risk his life to save mine so they left the human race alone because they saw the possibility that human could be heros and kind and put others above themselves. He saved our world.
I remember barely waking up and realizing he was safe and sound and that he was headed to work and I muttered to him good bye and that I loved him.

When he got back from work he said he wish I would turn off my own alarm clock. I had set it and he said he couldn’t believe it ran for a half hour and I didn’t budge. He finally turned it off.
So there is the sonic boom that was destroying my world and he saved us all by turning it off on his way to work. LMAO when I figured it out.

What made me laugh? Part of a script my students wrote and were acting out. It might be funnier to be there, but here it is:

CLAUDIA I’m Djali? A goat. A GOAT? I am a goat?! An executioner and a goat?!

PIXIE At least you’ll be on stage the whole time and won’t have a lot of lines. Less work.

CLAUDIA I have a lot of lines! What are they? Baa! My lines are what? Baa!

PIXIE It’s okay, don’t worry-

CLAUDIA BAA!!!! How dare she, how dare she! Baa! Put her on stage dancing and people will puke!

PIXIE Seriously… you are the captain of the cheerleading squad. Dancing’s what’s most important to you. I know. I’m sorry…

CLAUDIA (growling) Baaa! (beat) I might as well go buy a Baa fur coat-

PIXIE It’s really okay—Someone took it! My jacket! I think Esme took it! (runs out)

Converting to Norse Religion

“Basically Norse Religion is all about kicking asses and dying valorously in combat by bleeding to death on the battlefield after some jerk cut your arms off and stole your favorite hat. Anything else is for chumps.”

Having some problems with my new wood cook stove pipe clearances and insurance acceptability. My friend who knows about these things called on my behalf directly to the manufacturer to obtain a note of approval to satisfy insurance standards. After sometine he got off the phone making this declaration: “Ain’t no way you’re getting that on Amish letterhead!”

Having heard a great rumpus last night, I finally bestirred myself to go and investigate.

Milo was going three rounds with what turned out to be a Q-tip

@Blackberry – I don’t get it. Methinks your link got messed up somewhere along the way.

@gailcalled – Cats love Q-tips!

@Seelix: Milo seems to love my recent Xmas gifts.

Mug

Cushion

@Seelix Yeah, oh well. I have something else, instead.