Why would a man who has it all get drunk each morning?

No one has a perfect life, even people that seem to have it all have their own problems. Obviously, we wouldn’t know why he drinks in the morning. How could we?

He’s an alcoholic. What’s the mystery?

Many people have a “hole” in them that they try to fill with things, but the only thing that works for a moment is booze. Being successful with a model family is a form of denial for alcoholics, because they tell themselves (and everyone else) “how can I be an alcoholic if I have all of these things?”

So, there is a good chance he is an alcoholic, bu I doubt he will ever change until something shows him what his drinking is doing. For successful alcoholics, this is usually a problem with relationships.

He may just be a very heavy drinker. It all depends on if his life is unmanageable. If his family life is good, and his kids are close and happy and well adjusted, he just likes to drink a lot and is not an alcoholic.

Oh, come on, @zenvelo. Don’t you be in denial for this guy, too. A guy who “gets drunk each morning” is an alcoholic. Period.

I agree with @zenvelo that he’s probably trying to fill a void. Great riches are wonderful, but they can’t fill emotional or psychological needs. Maybe he’s lonely. You can be surrounded by a great many people and still be lonesome, if the relationships aren’t deep.

@CWOTUS You may consider him an alcoholic, and so might I, but if it has not negatively affected his life, he may not be. On what basis do you diagnose that he is an alcoholic?

Because he’s drinking to get drunk every morning. He doesn’t have to lose his family, his house, his car or even his job. If he drinks that much then he’s an alcoholic, even though he may be a high-functioning alcoholic. There are all kinds of high-functioning alcoholics and drug addicts in all kinds of professions, athletics, the ministry, everything. Someone who drinks that much (and that early) every day is an alcoholic.

Having nice things, a nice life, nice cars, a nice wife, and nice kids doesn’t mean anything to alcoholism or addiction.

He is unhappy in some area of his life, whether he is aware of it or not, and is drinking to cover the pain of something. No mystery.

Most of the alcoholics I know/have known have had it all.

Why do they drink? There are so many reasons. Addiction is not clear cut.
It could be that he has psychological issues and prefers to repress them.
It could be that he’s genetically predisposed.
There is new evidence to suggest certain nutrient deficiencies create addictive behaviors.

The list goes on. It could be one or all of these reasons all mixed together.

You don’t know anything about his inner demons. He may also have a genetic pre-disposition to being alcoholic.

His wife is Really becoming depressed about this, esp since she has stopped drinking. One of his three sons , 33, is drinking so much that his young wife and baby keep packing up and going to her parents’ house out of town. Genes at work?

Or the son was raised in a similar “repress your emotions” pattern of thought. Again, it comes down to nurture vs. nature. IMO, it’s rarely one thing.

My best advice to the wife is to get herself into therapy. She is most likely an enabler. She’ll have to help herself if she is looking to at all be helpful to her son or her husband.

@Aster So your late information shows the surface attraction of the family is not reality. His wife is either an alcoholic herself or a codependent or most likely both. Suggest both counseling and Al-Anon for her. The same thing goes for the daughter -in-law.

The women need to recognize they need to take care of themselves.

This could be the beginning of the end of the father’s drinking, if he loses his family. This will not be a short process, it could take years, or he might never quit. But the fun part, the party, is beginning to end.

You have answered your own question, when you told us about his wife and now his son. Its the alcohol gene at work in both parents.

They have too much. The alcohol is just a crutch for both of them to lean on.

This is a really bad situation for alcoholics that have too much money to buy booze with.

I agree with most comments, except to say he doesn’t need a present-day problem to make him an alcoholic. Alcoholism is an addiction, and like most addictions it can creep up on you until it’s an obvious problem and a hinderance. Maybe he turned to drink in his earlier years to get over a problem, but that’s not a given either, imho.