What are some marriage rituals, details, or ideas that seem to repeat in many cultures?

I think many, many cultures employ the exchanging of rings, or some sort of token.

1. It’s a social event in that you get married in front of friends and family. Therefore, as all eyes are on you, you want to look your best, whatever that might entail. I.e. dress, suit, hair, make-up, shiny accessories.
2. It’s a sharing event. I’m guessing something is either given or received in most ceremonies around the world. In the west, we give the married couple a gift, and I know in Japan the married couple receive money. Usually quite a substantial amount, but for that they are expected to put on a pretty good show, food and drink, and give back about a third of the present in a return gift. (I don’t think you’re expected to profit from a Japanese wedding)
3. It’s a happy event, and an important event. A celebration, a party, a coming together of two families, a union of two people.

Domestic violence.

Nearly every culture celebrate the union in some form or fashion with family and friends. Food, drinking and dancing. Brides all over the world usually wear elaborate fashions when they get married.

Kissing is part of most marriage traditions. I think it is interesting that in the Sudan, the bride and groom kiss the knees of their parents in a ceremony called sungkem.

This website might help come up with some similarities, @KatawaGrey. http://www.worldweddingtraditions.com/

I love the concept of your novels.

Celebrations by friends after the ceremony to tease the bride and groom. I’m thinking of shivaree, mariachi bands, hooting and hollering.
Wearing special costumes of some kind.
Feasting
Special color schemes.
Exchange of treasure of symbols of treasure.
Dancing.

KatawaGrey I love the idea for your book series. I think the whole idea of human as we know it and humanoid as distinct from it could open up a very interesting set of ideas. It makes me think of how humanity could truly be defined. The first thing that popped into my head when I read your question was flowers. Flowers are a part of wedding culture around the world, so common that we take it for granted. But what do flowers mean to humans? Why are we so enamored of them? Of course they are beautiful but could it be something more? One of the things I always remembered from my one class in anthropology in college was that there are Neanderthal burials which have been unearthed which show evidence that the bodies were buried with flowers. To think of how ancient that custom is was astounding to me. They take this to mean that Neanderthals believed in an afterlife.

I found this interesting article that purports to say that Africans don’t have a cultural history of appreciating flowers in art, etc.
http://igcs.binghamton.edu/igcs_site/mazpub/TheFloralGap.pdf
It has some interesting historical references so I have included it but I have to say, that I know it cannot be totally accurate. I know this because I have a book that is called Natural Fashion Tribal Decoration from Africa by Hans Silvester. This is a really cool video showing some of the pictures in the book. After watching this you cannot say that Africa does not have a cultural appreciation for flowers! I think it has a universal human meaning.
Les Tribus D’Omo .

Wow, thanks guys! For the most part, these are wonderful answers! I’m not gonna lie, I was worried that a lot of people would just come on and tell me to google it or give ridiculous answers, but so far, only one ridiculous answer!

@WillWorkForChocolate: I can’t believe I didn’t think of that. That makes so much sense. It’s such a small thing, but is still so significant.

@Rheto_Ric: One of the main wedding aspects about this species is that the weddings are communal and celebrations can last for weeks where couples can basically come up to an officiant, get married, and then go party down.

@bkcunningham: I didn’t know that such a website existed! Thank you so much!

@Sunny2: That is an excellent list. Once again, I didn’t even think of color schemes and costumes which would be so obvious.

@Earthgirl: I really love that you brought up flowers. I’ve just come up with a few new ideas based on that suggestion. The biggest difference between these people and humans is that they are nocturnal and exposure to the sun can cause severe damage and even death.

You guys all seriously rock. The ideas are seriously whirring away in my head.

KatawaGrey That sounds interesting. Maybe if you incorporate flowers into the story they could be night-blooming like moonflowers or other imaginary ones that you could just make up. It also might be interesting to have a special variety of flower that only blooms once every 5 years of something like that. The bloom year could be a special time when the community gathers and celebrates. It could be a traditional lucky year to get married in and have a special name.