When faced with difficult decisions/situations, where do you get the courage from?
Asked by
MilkyWay (
13911)
March 5th, 2012
When you are faced with something that is really, genuinely a difficult situation, or choice, or plan of action, from where do you get the courage to come to a decision and take action?
I’m not talking about general, but from personal accounts. Where do you get the courage to go ahead?
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23 Answers
I remind myself of all of the things I have faced and conquered in my past.
The less popular answer for Fluther: My Faith.
Well, I have made so many split decisions, involving life and death, that it would be difficult to name them all.
One incident: armed robber had just robbed a gas station and fled the scene. I pulled into a parking area and was talking to my wife on my cellphone. In my rearview mirror, I saw the suspect vehicle and suspect, out of his truck, and talking on a pay phone. The license plate number on the truck was the same as leaving the robbery. I told my wife to hold on a minute and put the openline cellphone on top of my police car. Gun drawn, I advised the suspect to fall to the ground. He did not. His right hand was in his bluejean pocket. I knew he was armed, so instead of shooting the suspect, I ran toward him. He was so shocked to see this manuever, that he tried to get inside his truck to leave. I grabbed his left arm and slung him down on the ground. I placed the handcuffs on him. The stolen money and his weapon were recovered in his right front bluejeans pocket. Would he have shot me? Good question. I did not give him to think about it.
My wife heard the whole takedown on her cellphone and was scared to death.
Where did my strength come from?
Guardian Angels.
I make pro and con lists. Then I ask my daughter, my son, my friends, my attorney. Then I come to a conclusion. And think I made up my own mind,
Eventually a choice has to be made, anyway. I might as well just make one.
I don’t know but I may have such a major decision to make in the next few months, and I have no idea where I’m going to get the courage from.
Easy, I get my courage from the fact that life can’t rewind. Every decision I make regardless of it’s a good or bad one becomes cemented in my past, I can’t worry about the NEXT choice. I can easily think back and remind myself of some of the stupidest choices I made in life, and I remember how happy I was to make those stupid choices. I get excited when I think about making a big decision, means I’m moving forward.
I suppose most of my decision-making ability comes from my time in the military. Many times I had to make very critical decisions with a very narrow window in which to make them, with lives literally in the balance.
Making decisions often requires a combination of knowledge and experience that only comes with practice. Start out by making small decisions based on knowledge, and gradually acquire the experience necessary for the big decisions.
I make do without courage. I find that the need to do what needs to be done is generally enough. I further find that there is no law saying you have to live life a certain way. The trick is learning to accept and be happy with what does happen in your life. You can beat yourself up if you want, but in the end, too much of that is not helpful. And it is real easy to beat yourself up too much. Back off. The courage is there. You’ll see that when the thing you were worrying about is past.
I take solace in the fact that every other decision I have made in my life has lead me here, and it ain’t so bad! So I make a decision and know that even if it wasn’t the best decision, it’s not a disastrous one.
From knowing that some day I’ll be dead, and nothing won’t matter for me anymore, so why not just go ahead now and see what happens. It’s like a bit of a comforting spring.
Or that if I fail in what I attempt, decide on and then what I’m doing doesn’t go as I plan it, it won’t really matter much, because shit will go on and adaptations shall be made. At least in my experience. I’m kind of a defeatist. I mean stuff for me though. Life is evil, and one’s choices can easily fuck another person up permanently, I just hope I never do that to someone.
I get my courage from the conviction not to lose.
I get my spunk from my father….....erm, ahh, awwwwkwwwarrrd!
I don’t know that I really have any courage to find, actually. I just kind of do what needs to be done. Survival seems to be my main goal in situations like these.
If I’m having a very hard time making a decision, I do the pros and cons thing, listen to advice from others, take into account what my gut says vs what my brain says and make the best decision I can.
@Symbeline Never give up was his motto, you can always come from behind son…bless dear daddy.
I want to have kids someday so that’s a motivation that keeps me going, cheesy and cliche, but true.
Every time I feel down and think about suicide, or if I get to a very tough suicidal point, I think about all the people that need me… All the people that I can help out. It’s true we need to help ourselves just as much as we need to help people.
No matter what, the bad never outweighs the good, in my life. No matter how horrible things are going I think about the time I was in love, had my family with me, or great friends I share laughter with…... No darkness is powerful and dark enough to shadow the good bright times..
I would see no point in giving up and killing myself, to hurt everyone who loved me, and not ever meet my children…. So when I feel down, anything I do is to have kid’s someday. My motivation for work, for helping people, for staying away from drugs, from staying away from bad people…....... Well for myself, and my future children that have yet to be born…..
@MilkyWay You do ask some interesting questions. I have no idea where I get it from. I’ll have to think on it a bit. I think I can look carefully at something and know what the best solution is, even if it’s not the easiest choice.Then you just have to put your head down and make the right choice. Reading my mother the riot act 4 days after she had open heart surgery was a bitch, but it had to be done. She wasn’t eating and she wasn’t fighting. I felt like shit, but it worked.
I’ve faced a lot of difficult decisions and situations in the past couple years—I’ll have to make another difficult decision really soon. I tend to intellectualize things first so I can detach from the emotional impact of my decision while weighing the pros and cons. In the end, I still consider the emotions surrounding my decision.
Often it does come down to—it doesn’t matter if I decide to go right or left, as long as I get off the road or I’ll get squashed; it must be decided—move in a direction or die.
Since every decision will get made, either by itself or by me, I prefer it be an active choice, not by default.
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