What is the word I am looking for here? (details inside)
Asked by
rojo (
24179
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March 23rd, 2012
You have just gotten through having a spirited discussion with your wife/girlfriend/S.O. about something that you want to do (or not do) and that she does not want to do (or do).
The last thing she said was “FINE”.
You have a sneaking suspicion from the way she said it through gritted teeth that things are not really fine and that “fine” was not what she actually wanted to say.
So, what was the word or phrase that was going through her head when she said “FINE” and turned her back on you?
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36 Answers
You’ll pay for this later.
“Okay, I’ll give in to you this time, whiner, but it’ll not be a very pleasant day out, you know that, and the consequences are known to you too.”
Or: “This fine means I have fined you.”
This is a rhetorical device described as
Ironic
Caustic
Acerbic
Inauthentic
Venomous
Vitriolic
Biting
It’s another 4 letter word, starting with F and ending with You behind it.
She is not happy with you.
The meaning of “fine” in this context is: you’re still wrong, but I’m tired of trying to argue the point, and I can’t stand to look at you anymore. We’ll get back to this later.
Ohhhh yes . . . that is the “fine” that is the fine point of a nib; the cutting edge of the knife; the “fine” that says I am so over you but not over this that it leaves me in a state of “fine.”
Cutoffed…......no sugar tonight.
It means, “okay, have it your way – a**hole!”
It means it’s not worth continuing to talk about it… you’ll have to learn the hard way.
Oh come on. Not everyone who leaves a conversation with the word “fine” means I’m leaving. There are certain things that, when my husband and I discuss them, the conversation leaves on a “fine” because we’ve reached a place of nonagreement. (I know that really isn’t a word, but it’s the closest I can come to what it is.) We agree to disagree. It’s not a relationship killer. It is what it is.
@annewilliams5 Depends on if you say “fine” in a calm, sweet voice, or if you say “FINE!” as @rojo indicated. I don’t think “FINE!” is a response that indicates agreeing to disagree.
@annewilliams5 I agree. I do think said in that gritted teeth way it does mean, “I’m not happy” but I don’t think it means “I am out the door.”
Well, I do have to agree with that, @janbb . I think the response from @erichw1504 is extreme.
I took @erichw1504 ‘s response as a humorous one and it’s just for fun guys.
I am loving the responses.
I will say that a bunch of us had a lot of fun on a raft trip after this discussion. It is like “dude” you can use it in so many situations.
” Fine” in women speak means ” Fine, but yes, you’re gonna pay for this concession.” lolol
The answer fine – when I give it – usually means I’m (F)earful, (I)nsecure, (N)eurotic and/or (E)motional. Whenever I hear someone else say it – especially as the last word in a conversation almost always is a bad sign.
@ro_in_motion haha, I like that breakdown. My favorite along those lines is to never…
J.A.D.E.
Justify, argue, defend or explain. ;-)
It’s long since been established that when women say this, usually accompanied by a steely glare & ending with them “flouncing off”, that they will get sweet revenge in so many ways for reluctantly agreeing on, well, whatever it may be.
And men never say “Fine!” or something equivalent?
Whenever I say, “ok fine” , which is fairly often, it means, “we disagree on this but I’m too busy to discuss it further with you.” There are no threats involved at all.
“I feel so many negative ways about where this discussion has gone, that I will concede to end it until I catch up with the emotions I am feeling.”
In other words, almost like an emotional pause. The distress she feels will still inhabit her tone and actions until she is able to talk it out and be heard, probably by someone different, unless the listener is wise enough to probe gently.
It does not in any way, under any circumstances, mean that she agrees with you or with anything she is saying.
EDITED: The ONE word? Hmmmm….“PAUSE!!!”
They say “fine!”, but they think “FIN”.
@janbb I can’t answer for everyone but I don’t. So, what is the masculine equivalent of FINE? Stony silence? A glare and a beer?
In the context of the question, I think it means she is right and you need to shut up…and/or as @Adirondackwannabe put it so eloquently “F… You” :P
I think you have to take into account how the word is said.
It might very well mean “F… You”.
It could also mean “I don’t have the time or/and energy to discuss this further” (for now).
It could mean “you are a dickhead and there is no point arguing further” (for now).
It always means you have reached an impasse (for now) and it is never a positive thing.
I should say I am too bloody minded, stubborn and direct to use ‘Fine’ very often. I would much rather duke it out (figuratively speaking) with my husband if whatever we are discussing really matters to me.
@noraasnave I’m impressed! An enlightened Marine. I didn’t know that was a potential. ;-)
I think it means, “That’s enough for now. I need time to gather my thoughts and more ammunition for this argument!”
You really don’t get it, and this is f*cked! And I am ususually the one who has to go along to get along, and you almost always get your way, even if it scr*ws me over.
Just taking a stab in the dark here
It’s saying “I’m done with this, you are in f*ckville now!”
And anything you say after “Fine” gets the response “Did you say something? I was busy ignoring you.”
@Coloma a compliment on fluther? I am stunned and….appreciative! Yes, there are Marines that can survive outside of the Marine Corps. I am the only one I know that is Majoring in Philosophy.
In truth, I have never really fit in well in the Marine Corps. I was always too observant…too respectful of all ranks, and way too respectful of authority.
I am as surprised as anyone that I am going to retire after 20 years of faithful and honorable service!
I just realized that you are really saying that you liked my answer and thought it was insightful! I have my soul mate to thank for that, I have learned volumes on the female english language from her. Don’t worry she didn’t just reveal all the secrets, we all know that this is NOT how women work, but I have sought the deep answers and have figured out the little I have from observing and pursuing her.
The analogy I have found is:
Women are like the greatest treasure that one can never truly find. You pursue one your entire life…and find out they give you the treasure one little piece at a time.
^^ Gracious, swooning a little over here.
Means “Not any for you for a loooooooong time!!”
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