Will you dump your SO if you found out that he/she can't give you a baby?

I would never do that. I don’t go into anything less than 100 percent.

I’m way too young to want kids anyway. Of course not.

No. I don’t want a baby, so that’s an easy answer. I also don’t have a s/o, so… But say I did, and my s/o wasn’t able to, but assuming that he also wants a baby…there’s other options. Adoption, perhaps. There certainly is no shortage of kids needing a home and parents.
But no, I wouldn’t dump a lover because of that.

There are lots of ways to get a baby.

A lot harder to find someone you love, that loves you, with the right timing, location and life situation to make you both want to spend a good portion of your lives together.

You can figure the baby thing out, the rest has confounded people for a long long time.

Did the person lie to you? That would be of great concern to me if they did.

As to the baby – it would depend why he could not father a child. As has been said, there are other options such as adoption/IVF and I would want to investigate those if it was a medical issue. If it was a personal choice issue – why should he have to have a baby because I want one if he really doesn’t want to? I would have to evaluate what was most important to me.

When my wife and I were dating, we both talked about how much we both wanted kids.
My wife got pregnant during the honeymoon. I was very excited.
2 months later, she miscarried. She then told me she had miscarried with her first husband as well. I became very worried that she wouldn’t be able to go to term with a child.
I remember being quite depressed, but I don’t remember ever thinking about abandoning ship.
She did get pregnant twice more, and both were premies, but I have a son and a daughter.

Well, I would hope you love this s/0 more than just to be a sperm donor.

If you love this person, you can always adopt.

Throwing this person to the wolves is pretty low, just because they cannot give you a child.

There is more to loving someone, than just a roll in the hay.

Honestly, I’d say no. I’m too young to have experience on this, but there’s surrogacy, adoption, etc. It can be worked out, but only if you want it to.

I agree with @Bellatrix: if there was deception involved, that would be a problem for reasons independent of the whole baby issue; if she had just waited until we were past the preliminary stages of our relationship to divulge the problem, that would seem to be her right. As others have noted, there are other ways to have a child together; and “I’m infertile” just doesn’t seem like first date material to me.

In the scenerio you present, they know it is important to me, they know they are infertile, and they never tell me? Probably I would dump them for the lie.

I wound up to be infertile, and my husband and I are still together. It is a dissappointmemt to both of us, but not one was being deceptive.

I was not dumped. I offered, once I found out I couldn’t, but that was mostly because I was depressed and felt kind of worthless. She didn’t take me up on the offer. Eventually, we were able to have gen-kids, due to advances in technology.

You never know what might happen, I guess. Unable to make a baby today, and in a few years, you can do it.

But this is a journey each person must take on their own. You may try fertility treatments and then donor sperm or eggs and eventually start considering adoption. Maybe one person can’t accept anything other than a gen-child. Or maybe is unwilling to let their spouse have a gen-child, if they can’t. I.e., would only accept adoption and not donor genetic material.

At that point, it’s an issue that could lead to the dissolution of the relationship. But I think you really need to work all these possibilities before you get to the point of saying that the opportunity to have a gen-child is world leaving this relationship.

I wouldn’t leave someone for that. If I love them, then that’s all there is. There’s always adoption, or as @wundayatta said, advances in technology have made it possible.

I’m about to get hitched. We’ve been together almost 5 years and I’ve made it 100% clear from the beginning that having children is a non-negotiable. If he ends up being infertile, it wouldn’t be a deal breaker. However, if he told me this far in that he’s known he can’t have children and didn’t tell me I would have to re-evaluate everything. It would be about the major lie by omission, not the infertility.

It depends on how things went. For example, before my husband and I started dating officially and were getting to know each other, we both said we wanted to have children. That would’ve been the time for him to be honest and tell me that he knew he could not have children but hopes to adopt. Waiting for me to fall in love and then tell me would be very manipulative. So I would probably dump him. Not because he can’t knock me up but because I would feel I couldn’t trust him. Especially since I told him how much I would love to have kids some day. I was always completely honest with the guys, I dated. I told them all that I would be and hated mind games. I would’ve seen this as a mind game.
Now if he didn’t know and later we find out that he was sterile than that would not have been a problem. Or if he told me from the beginning than I would also not have a problem. It would hurt a little that I could not have a child that is half of each of us, but I always felt if I couldn’t, than I would have no problem with adopting.
Another reason to drop the other person for me would be if he knew I wanted kids and was fixed and refused to get unfixed. Then, that would tell me he never wanted kids and again was lying and trying to manipulate me.

Score! Now we don’t have to worry about protection as much.

Thank ya’ll for the answers.
@Bellatrix , yeah, that’s the point. He lied. He knows from the beginning he couldn’t have a baby. And he didn’t tell her about it. And now they’re married. I’m actually referring to a friend of mine (the wife) in this situation.
I don’t know what to tell her.
She may be forgive him but she might often wonder what else he’s hiding from her. And that’s going to be really hard.

Maybe some other jellies can pitch in here with more knowledge, but I believe people rarely know whether or not they can have children until they’ve tried and then eventually get tested to see what is keeping them from having children.

Even then I think it’s less likely to be absolute and general thinking says “there’s always a chance”. From talking to people, doctors rarely give you concrete answers, because they just don’t know.

It’s also extremely personal, with more far reaching implications than just the ability to have children.

I guess, in short, I’m just trying to say it may not be as clear cut as “he knew”. From the combined experience of myself and the few people I’m close enough to discuss the “fun” of having kids with, one of the most frustrating things is the lack of answers.

It basically comes down to a series of “try this and see what happens” followed by tests and another set of things to try after that. It’s usually only after years of trying that doctors recommend even starting tests.

If someone I had met and fallen in love with, would be knowingly deceiving me by withholding that information, then I would seriously doubt that she would be Ms Right.

If someone would not be wanting children, but I would, then I would most likely break up.

if someone would share my wish for children, but for whatever reason we wouldn’t be able to get them, then we will ride that ride together. Maybe adopt, or look for other ways.

It would be upsetting/sad, but no I would not.

My current g/f was adopted. Her parents tried for years and couldn’t conceive and finally adopted her. They seem very happy, so why wouldn’t that work?

I’m pretty sure there thousands of kids that don’t have parents that would love some.

I’m with @Bellatrix, not being able to have children wouldn’t be a deal breaker for me but lying about it – even a lie by omission just might be.

Nope. I married her because I love her, not because I love the children she might have had. Fortunately, neither of us can have children now. Besides, I already have five. How many do I need, for crying out loud? LOL!

@CaptainHarley I’d say at least six.

heyo

LMAO!

NOT!!!! : P

I don’t want children, so no, I wouldn’t leave the person over that. It would be a non-issue.

He can’t give me a baby and that is fine by me. No way am I dumping him because of that.

If he had kept this secret from me well into our relationship then, despite the fact that I don’t want children, I would be concerned about the fact that he had kept it from me. It would make me wonder what else he was hiding.

Another vote for what @Bellatrix and others have said. Not being able to have children wouldn’t be a deal-breaker. Though lying about it probably would be.