Taking your turn at chauffeuring the kids on dates, what priceless one-liners have you heard coming from the back seat?

Ten GQ’s but not one answer. I’m sorry, Jeruba :/

I don’t have an answer either. I never chauffeured my son, and the few time I did my daughter they didn’t talk the whole time. Sweet question.

I’m not a parent, but I do remember the chauffeur days, from 14–15.
Their moms always talked to me more than they did…

I felt invisible; it was fascinating. There were no specific one-liners but a huge amount of information being transmitted, amidst giggles and shrieks.

Like @gailcalled I can’t remember specifics, but I felt like they forgot I was in the car with them. They talked about things that they never would had if I had asked them to. I kept my mouth shut and listened. It was fascinating.

This question made me laugh out loud.
And seeing how many GQs it got has made me laugh even louder.

Wow, ^^ me too! When I got back here today, it was up to 18. A lot of people must be curious! Too bad we haven’t gathered more specific recollections.

Well, I have one. When my son was about 14 and on his first or second outing with a certain girl, and kind of snuggling up to her as close as he could without attracting too much notice in the rear-view mirror, I heard him make this conversational overture:

“So—what’s your favorite adhesive?”

@Jeruba, did you catch her reply? You can learn a lot about a woman based on the type of glue she prefers. I have a thing for women who use Mod Podge. Girls who prefer glue guns have gotten me in trouble.

Alas, alas, no. I think it might have taken her a little time to process what the question suggested about my son, a divergent thinker right from the start.

It’s also possible and even probable that he said that for my entertainment, testing my powers of self-restraint. One of my rules as a parent has always been: “If it’s funny, I’m allowed to laugh.”

In my family there was no dating before people were driving. Kids could do things in groups, but no one dated before 16.

Yeah….same thing with my dad. Said I couldn’t go on a car date until I was old enough to drive the car and get away.

I chauffeured my daughter and her boyfriend once, when they were 15. It was a “real” date to Gambino’s. I instructed the young man on the finer points of treating a woman. He opened the car door for her. My daughter said he pulled her seat out at the table for her (I wasn’t there for the actual date.) I think it was a good learning experience for them both.

But I don’t remember them saying anything in particular.

I never drove my children for “dates either.” They didn’t date until they were 16.

I never drove my kids on dates either, just group events.

My ex has driven one of my girls to a few dates, but I think the boy’s parents drove him to the location, too. The most he got to spy on was a peck on the cheek, when he was picking her up after a date.

I never drove my son on any dates, but it was always a blast driving him and his friends around to parties or sporting events. Sadly, I don’t remember too many of the funny moments, but I know there were many.

Well, when my son was 15, 16, he had some very close friends who were pretty much a part of the family. Still are. One of the guys lived a straight shot down our street, but about 2 miles further. They all needed to go to their house. I had a Ford Taurus, and not enough room for the gangly teens. Well, my son, Chris and his friend Jauvey (Mom was an illegal, and very illiterate and uneducated,) started agitating to ride in the trunk! I said, “Hail no!” But…they talked me into it. So I shut them in the trunk. I turned on elevator music loud (the speakers are in the trunk!) At one point I kind of rocked the car back and forth and yelled, “We’re crossing the Rio Grande now, Jauvey!” The other guys in the car were yelling stuff back at them too. During a lull we suddenly heard, from the trunk, my son yelling, “No Jauvey! No! Don’t touch me!!” We all died! When we let them out I asked Jauvey what he had done and he says, “Nutheeng!!!” and punched Chris! :) That’s the closest I can come to answering your question.