Is the new norm not to thank people for wedding or shower gifts?

No, not that I have noticed anyway. We’ve also sent gifts for weddings and babies this year and have received Thank-You’s pretty promptly.

I recall last year one wedding party was about 3mos behind on their Thank-You’s. The only reason we were concerned was due to us sending the gifts and wanting to know if they had been received or not.

I agree with you @chyna, not sending any kind of appreciation via any outlet is definitely rude.

I don’t think it’s normal. You might want to check to make sure they received it.

I think it is normal, but certainly not proper. I wish such notes were back in style.

@wundayatta I do know through a second party that they received it. In one instance it was my nephew and it was a significant amount of money, cash, and my brother asked him. He said he had received it and would send a thank you. This was last October. In another instance it was a check and was cashed.

Hmmm. @chyna Could you tell your brother you still haven’t received the thank you? Are they still within the year limitation? I think you have a year from the wedding to give a gift and a year to say thank you.

I don’t think it is necessarily the new norm but rather many young people today are not taught proper ettiquete or both couples are so busy working to make ends meet, that it gets over looked.

@wundayatta My brother has brought it up several times with him. It totally bothers my brother. Heck, he didn’t get one either.

I think it is not uncommon for young people to not realize the importance of it, assuming they are young, even 50 years ago. Parents made sure these things happened a lot of the time. Young people today almost never write a handwritten note to someone for any reason, so even less likely they will send a thank you. I still receive thank you cards the majority of the time for gifts I have sent though. For me personally I don’t care if it is hand written or email or a phone call. As someone mentioned above, I just want to know they received it, an added bonus is if from their response I can tell they really like the gift.

I don’t think a thank you card is necessary for a gift given in person and opened at the time of the gift, and already thanked at the time of opening. It is still etiquette to send one probably, but I find it unnecessary. Since showers usually have all the gifts opened during the shower, I know she received it and thanked me. Wedding gifts are not open during the event, so some sort of card or acknowledgement should be sent. Just my opinion.

I think that is unheard of.

I don’t think it’s normal but it doesn’t bother me as long as I know the gift was received.

Say cheers norm.

When I got married, I made sure that I read up on my wedding etiquette, to make sure I didn’t commit some personal slight by not sending thank you cards in a timely manner. If common courtesy and etiquette are no longer in fashion, then I don’t know what to say about that, other than it makes me sad that our little niceties are disappearing from society.

I would never mention to the person that I didn’t receive a thank you note. If I have to ask for it, it means nothing. But I would make a mental note that the person wasn’t even gracious enough to thank me, and any future gifts would be given (and purchased!) with that in mind.

Common courtesy seems to be generally off the table. I no longer expect it, so am pleasantly surprised occasionally.

So the States have finally caught up with (down with?) the rudeness of the Middle East? I always liked that in North America a card, or at least a call, was in order.

It pisses me off and is pure laziness and poor manners.

I don’t know; I typically receive a thank you note for giving gifts at bridal/baby showers. I’m wondering though, is it the norm to not send thank yous for kids’ birthday parties anymore? Because I rarely see those.

I don’t think so but I have seen more and more invites, followups and thank you’s by email and e-cards. At first I thought it was strange but not anymore.

Typically, I get thank you notes for baby gifts, weddings and showers. However, birthdays and Christmas seem to garner nothing. I have ONE nephew whose wife would take the time to write a thank you note. I have a grand-nephew who graduated from high school this year. I am interested to see if I get a thank you for the check that I sent.

Uh no, I hope this doesn’t become the norm. However, it is the general rule that you have up to a year fro a wedding to send a thank you. not sure about a baby shower, but some people just weren’t raised to know these things. That’s not an excuse, just how it is. My Mother drilled into my head proper manners of thank you cards, never go to someone’s house empty handed, etc.

I’ll send my MIL to you so you can redirect her to the uncouth people in question. She can harangue and guilt anyone into sending a thank you card.

I like getting a thank you but I’m not really upset if I don’t.

Are @tedibear and @rarebear related?

In my daughter’s pre-school class, about half the kids (under the wing of their parents, of course) send thank you notes. I have to say, last year we didn’t, this year we did, for the gifts she received for her birthday party.

@zensky Not that I’m aware of. But I think that rarerdenver and rarebear are related.

Are missdenver and @raredenver related?

Zensky and zenvelo?

No, we’re just lovers.