What are some useless features on everyday objects or any object in general?

In my opinion:
Elevator Door Close button
Ice maker/dispenser in refrigerator. It takes up tons of space an put a hole in the door that always leaks. Use Ice cube trays.
Pencils with Hard lead
¾ of the functions on my phone.

tits on a bull.

A mouse pad. The top of my desk works just fine.

Any function on a cellphone that is not related to, you know, telephony.

@LuckyGuy Actual the close button on the elevator is the most used. That is because people are in a hurry and want to have control. Some close buttons are not connected however.
Pajama tops for me at least.

car alarms

breasts on a man.

Braille on drive up ATM’s.

Tachometers on cars with automatic transmissions.

@LuckyGuy I always use the EDCB when I’m in a hurry and don’t wish to wait for other people even if they are running towards the elevator (Rude!!! Shame on me.)
@Brian1946 I can’t live w/o this
@elbanditoroso Try saying that to the men that love…
@Tropical_Willie PJ tops, who needs them! LOL

This may be stretching the premise of the Q a bit but…

The “man on the street” interview feature of newscasts. What is that supposed to tell us?

@thorninmud – It is supposed to tell us that the “news” organization has given up even pretending to do investigative journalism of any kind. They could just show photos of cute kittens and accomplish the same thing.

My understanding is that (at least in the US) the button does nothing. There is a weight sensor that detects when change stops. That allows the door to stay open when people are going in and out, and then close as soon as the transfer stops. Very efficient.
@Yeahright Try the experiment. My guess is the button makes no difference. Pushing it just makes you feel better. (I guess it does do something then.)

Useless as:
The FBI warning on a DVD, CD, or Video detailing that piracy is illegal.
The brand name labels on anything made in china – Coach, YSL, Fendi, Rolex, etc.
The trigger lock on new revolvers.

The pedestrian crossing button on at least some traffic lights, which show a walk/don’t walk sign, but do not cause the light to change any sooner.

@LostInParadise that’s for blind people, I think

What I hate is worse than useless, it is downright infuriating. Appliances and furniture items with curves, indentations, and other dirt catching crevasses that cannot be cleaned. What is wrong with straight, flat cleanable surfaces?

@cazzie, lol.

@LostInParadise I puzzled over this for a long time too. Then I watched and some lights do not automatically have a walk sign with the green light. Pushing the button will make one appear for the walkers. It doesn’t ever make the light change faster, as far as I can see.

@YARNLADY I sooo agree!! Those grooves on the front of the dishwasher, or the part on the stove that is meant to be a ‘design feature’ and it does nothing but collect dirt you need a surgical instrument to remove. grrrr.

The sign next to an access road near a runway that reads: “Watch for low flying aircraft”.

The ‘serving suggestion’ that is offered on the label of processed foods. Example

The warning on the back of a packet of salted peanuts that reads: “Warning: May contain traces of nuts”.

@downtide.. that reminds me of seeing a package of rat poison that said ‘may contain nuts’. Really?

Here is whole page of funny warning labels. http://www.rinkworks.com/said/warnings.shtml

The “Baby on board” signs people hang on their cars. How’s that supposed to work? Is this a factor people weigh in deciding whether or not to have an accident?

Silica gel packets-“Do not eat”

Tits on a bull dike.

Half the buttons on my remote control.

I actually use both the popcorn button on the microwave and my car horn pretty regularly, so I don’t consider them useless.

@thorninmud The ‘baby on board’ signs are supposed to alert rescue personnel to search for a baby in the event of an accident.

Useless to me: many of the keys on my keyboard (as I have no clue what they do!) and a lot of the functions of my phone. It’s not even a smart phone, either.

I’ve never used the Scroll Lock or the Pause/Break keys on my board.