How do you demonstrate love?

I don’t think that you can see it on the outside in the early stages of a relationship. I remember the insecurities of those days.

But things will be going extremely well, you will feel in tune with the loved one, the sun will shine brighter and the birds will sing louder and everything will be more intense. Also, everything else in life will pretty much fall away in importance.

GQ! As for signs to look for – that is hard to say for any individual, as we all respond differently to stimuli. For myself, I usually see a change from “I” to “Us” in my thought processes. First signs of love involve contentment and planning future arrangements together (the crazy monkey sex is part of the infatuation stage). I’d say once it tapers off to a familiarity and a comfort is when I know it’s the real deal for me. Looking ahead and not seeing giant warning signs? That’s a definite staple as well.

In regards to demonstration, I definitely get out the “nice voice” when talking with my partner. It’s weird to imagine our relationship without those voices. In addition, I usually give more once I’m in love, whether it be giving of time or money or deeds.

I give him all the juice from the canned wild organic salmon and don’t mind eating the rather dry remaining flesh.

I’m in love and how I show it is by:

Telling my loved one how beautiful he is
Telling him how impressed I am by him when he does impressive things
Reach out to hold his hand when we are together
Like just being in the room with him
Want to make him happy
Ask him for his opinion
Feel sad when he is sad
I am visibly happy when I see him after not seeng him all day
Call for him when I want him to watch something on TV that I think he will enjoy
Ask him to participate with me in a new interest or hobby
Assuming he will be with me now and tomorrow

I feel loved by him because he does the same.

Demonstrations of affection depend on the “Love Language” of the person speaking. The five main categories are;
1 Acts of service
2 Physical affection
3 Quality time
4 Gifts
5 Words of affirmation.
If you pay attention to your lover, you will see what his “language” is, and be better able to speak it. THis will make him feel loved, and in turn more willing to speak the language which makes you feel loved.
Yaaay for you! I hope it goes really well!
(I would cite my reference, but all I can remember is the possible name of the book; “Languages of love”... maybe)

@Trillian has a good point. It depends a lot on the person..my husband’s ex-wife only felt loved when she was given nice gifts like jewelry. Whereas I don’t like jewelry at all – for me it’s primarily acts of service that make me feel loved..

For me & my hubby how we show love is normally thoughtful actions.

Examples:
He noticed my iced tea pitcher in the fridge was nearly empty so he brewed me a new batch. This makes me feel very loved.

While he’s away on trip I take extra care to vacuum 2 or 3 times because it matters to him (he’s kinda uptight about cat/dog hair on the floor) and so when he gets home it won’t stress him out.

I make sure to track & promptly renew all his car magazine subscriptions because he LOVES those magazines. He feels loved that I know what he loves and take care to make sure they keep coming uninterrupted.

And finally, my hubby really likes it if I just wander up to him and kiss him “for no reason” in the middle of the day. This makes him feel singled out and loved – and like I’m thinking of him all the time.

Is love something you demonstrate? I think that if you are looking from the outside, you can say this or that demonstrates love, but from the inside, love is something you feel about someone else, and it motivates you to do things that other people might say demonstrate your love.

Some things are kind of overt. You kiss your love. You say, “I love you.” You might give them gifts. You might do things for them. You take them places or do things with them that are so they might be happy. You might try to serve them, however they want to be served. You might make love to them.

Many, many actions are filled with love. For me, most things having to do with my children stem from my love for them. Trying to teach my wife to cook is an act of love (and forebearance). Listening to my wife’s household concerns every day is an act of love. Mowing the lawn. Cleaning the dishes. Killing mice and rats and other pests. Dealing with dead things. All acts of love for me. Because some of these things she always does and when I do them I show I recognize she needs help, and other things she can not do because of her psychological makeup, so I do them for her.

But I never thing “oh, this is a demonstration of love” when I do these things. I just do them because we have a relationship and I just want to do what I can to make it work out better.

Some of these things she gets, and others she doesn’t. I’m not sure she understands that getting rid of dead rats is an act of love. But it is, for me. She likes to be told “I love you.” She likes to be hugged. So I make sure I do these things no matter how I feel because I want her to understand, as often as possible, that I love her.

“Love” for me is a meeting of the minds, followed by the slow addition of other parts. ;-)
Sooo, if a person is really sparking my delight, if they are bright, funny and easy going, quirky, offbeat, not rigid except when it counts, overly anal…well….all things considered my rational brain will still philosophize about the meaning of “love” anyway. lololol

My actions will speak louder than my words and when I am in love I will hostess and “entertain” you like crazy. I will spare no effort to make our time together exceptionally decadent and pampering. But only for so long, you’ll still have to go home and give me my space. haha

Simply by being there when needed with my mouth shut and my heart and ears open.

@wundayatta Heh..well, I guess I am the perfect woman, I love to hostess and entertain and I am also not squeamish. My ex husband ran like a little girl from anything gross like dead rodents. lol
Last night my cat was starting to crunch a gopher in my living room and I simply picked it up by the nape of it’s half gnawed off little head and tossed it off my deck. haha
I do not like the little “thud” sound the bodies make so I run for the house before I hear the thud though. :-D

I like a lot of @Trillian comments. Willing acts of service and self sacrifice, words of affirmation, physical affection, appreciation of idiosyncracies… These, in my opinion, are encouraging signs to give and to receive.

He says or does something wonderful or quirky or cute or with intensity or wittily or cornily and I’ll think, and then say, God, I love you so fucking much. And I can’t take my eyes off him. Outwardly, this all comes across as goofy grinning and staring.

I can feel it when it’s awkward, and we just stare. Then he looks away, and laughs like it’s funny. He later told me he laughs because it’s “cute”

I’ve never really thought of how I try to demonstrate my love for someone. Everyone can tell, and I have no idea that I’m being so obvious.

Everyone is different in certain ways and we all have our little quirks.
I know someone loves me when they can smile at my little idiosyncrasies, not only smile, but actually give me a feeling that those idiosyncrasies are just part of my ineffable charm.

I know someone loves me when they go out of their way to do something for me that they know I hate doing or that is difficult for me, especially if I have already told them that I will take care of it. Some people call this codependency, It isn’t always, but I know it can be.

I know someone loves me when their face lights up when I enter the room.
Wordless glances can tell me a lot.

I feel loved when I can make someone laugh, when they understand my sense of humor.

I feel loved when I am the first person they seek out to share their good news, and bad.

When I fall in love I always feel so inspired and full of life! It makes me feel very creative.
I also feel very giving. I want to give something personal to my lover, especially something that I have made, or a poem that I’ve written.
I feel like I am seeing the world through new eyes. Even things that I have seen a million times or done a million times take on a new light. I wonder what he will think of it, what he would say about it, how he would experience it, and that gives it a new excitement. It’s common, I suppose. When a person falls in love they want to share all of their special places and special people with their love.

I feel loved and give love through attention—conversations, impromptu text-photos of things around me, little notes left around the house, etc. I also need, really need, to feel wanted for who I am, safe and respected, or I will withdraw and eventually lose interest—so any indication of being tolerated or looked at with contempt will make me turn tail. I also love innuendoes and subtle flirting.

The 5 Love Languages also says that people give what they want—and that’s true for me. I give what I want. GQ and good luck on your budding romance!! Enjoy! :)

How I knew I was in love was experiencing an internal feeling of awe. Overwhelming awe. How I demonstrate love is mostly through touch and acts of service. Holding hands, laying my hand on his hip while falling asleep, rubbing his legs and feet after a long day, making him an outstanding sandwich, rubbing his back while he falls asleep, buying things I know he likes at the grocery store. Words, too, though… telling him “You’re my favorite”, leaving a little note in his shoe, telling him I love him more than all the stars in the sky. Little, everyday things.

Good luck with your new relationship, Jake. You deserve all the love the world has to give. <3

A desire to give endless support is, for me, the initial sign that I really love that person.

Obviously followed up by giving them that support.

Another kudos to @Trillian for referencing the languages of love. Me, I’m an acts of service and physical affection person which matches well with my husband who is much the same.

I think love isn’t really strictly definable, and definitely depends on the people involved as well as their situation. I like to look at examples in my life, such as the relationship between my parents. This may seem silly, but think of a pet dog’s relationship with their owner. They are loyal, attentive, affectionate, accepting, and completely themselves. Does that sound anything like what you are experiencing?
The way I demonstrate love is being selfless. I give when I don’t have enough for myself and will be whoever they need me to be. Love is about building one another up, even when there is no need for it.