Does unsolicited advice tick you off?

Yes. A lot of people tried to tell me things about my mom’s health issues that had no clue as to the doctor visits and consultations I had already been through. I know they were trying to help, but even as I told them the things I already knew, they tried to tell me things I should do. They were not doctors or nurses, just people that had already had their own health issues that did not even resemble my moms’ health issues.

Yeah it’s like…you know…yeah…

Yep. It used to do, before I grew a pair (of ovaries).

There’s something now, that repels unwanted advice… or I’ve gotten really good at tuning it out.

People do this because I homeschool all. the. time.

My son is now getting to an age where it irks him. He politely answers the snide remarks with wonderful things he’s learned or the social plans he has for the week.

People also do this because of my son’s diagnosis. Usually once I rattle off all of the specialists we’ve seen and the therapy we’ve sought, they back off. We have a few that haven’t…but luckily I rarely have to deal with them.

Not at all. I often learn something useful that I hadn’t known. If they go on and on without listening for a response from me, it can be irritating; but a quick ‘Have you tried . . .?’ or ‘Did you know that . . .?’ is welcome. The comment may also remind me of something I’d forgotten.

My much older brother loves to give unsolicited advice. It took me years to figure out that he is a problem solver. He’s good at it. He just doesn’t get that some people are quite capable of solving their own problems. Because of him, I’ve learned when people share their woes to ask them if they just need to vent or if they are seeking solutions. If it is the former, I just sit back and listen.

@Sunny2 Way to go! Thanks for reminding me of my personal goals. Not even being sarcastic, not at all.
Goal: Stop being cynical and start seeing the real intentions.

Not at all. Are people overbearing sometimes? Yes. But if someone interjects with genuine advice, I will consider that advice as them trying to help me out because I know when I’m being stubborn or wrong.

The difference between someone being helpful or not depends on the situation. I’ve received a lot of advice that has helped me a lot, but seemed rude at the moment. Even though the person was rude about it, I knew they were right. It’s not always about sugarcoating things and coddling to make you feel better. Advice is advice, if it’s good.

Usually not. Sometimes when my dad does it it really bothers me.

Only when it disagrees with my preconceived opinions. ;-)

Some other good answers – How do you respond to unsolicited advice?

It use to when I was younger but I noticed it usually came after I was ranting about something. So now I simply tell people that I just need to rant a little and am not looking for advice but simply need a sympathetic ear and the advice doesn’t follow. And some people I don’t rant at all with because I know they will have something to say.
I probably give the most unsolicited advice but its usually when I hear people say the most idiotic things and expect you to agree as if I suddenly must’ve suffered a severe brain injury.

Otherwise, I find most people will complain about the same thing over and over as if looking for advice and then get bent out of shape if someone tries to offer a solution.
Some advice is simply given out of love and concern as in the example you gave before. Especially if someone thinks there may be a medical problem that requires a professional opinion..

@chyna Holy crap you know my boss lol. He did the same thing when my father was sick, throwing out all these things when he knew nothing about the entire situation.

Depending on my mood in general is how I deal with the situations when people do this. I hear them, but ultimately I make my own decisions regardless of what anyone else thinks. What I do not like is when they talk to me like I haven’t thought things through. Anyone who knows me even a little bit knows I am a very analytical person, so for me to say “I’m going to do X” means I have put a good amount of thought into the decision.

I don’t mind people giving me advice if I haven’t asked for it, but often if I haven’t asked for it, it can be a little imposing, and there have been plenty of times where they really didn’t know what they were talking about. I wasn’t rude about rejecting it, though.

Yes, and actually my 24 yr. old daughter is the worst. lol
It’s some twisted role reversal and I am only fifty f——ing two, not 82! haha
I have to gently and not so gently remind her that I know what I’m doing. I chalk it up to the know it all-ness of youth.

” Mom, I think you should buy a new car, house, do this, do that…..” OMG!
Other than her opinionated input it’s all good.

Not at all. I love it when people can help me with their ideas.

I’m annoyed by it when it’s in a casual setting. E.G. I was playing soccer this morning (and none of us are any good at soccer) and there is one guy who is average at soccer who kept wanting to give me pointers.. which is all well and good… but none of us will ever be real futbol players or anything. We were just playing for fun. You know… now that I spell all this out I can’t find a reason to be annoyed by it… yet I was.

Depends who is giving it and their intent. Sometimes, even if I didn’t ask for it, it can be helpful and warranted. At other times it is just know-all people who feel they have to tell everyone else how to live their lives.

I am probably as guilty as the next person of giving unsolicited advice at times too. I don’t really care if people go .. meh… though. Take it or leave it is fine with me.

I like to call that verbal diarrhea shat from the mouths of patronising scrotum breathed pissants.
As you can see, i’m quite the diplomat :¬)

@chyna Oh sheesh, you’re not kidding! I know several people who try to give me medical advice all the time. I end up having to tell them, “You know I grew up with a nurse, right? And you know how many medical texts and all sorts of related literature I’ve read, right? You do not know more about this than I do, so trust me I got this.” LOL!

I’m with @Bellatrix on this one. I don’t mind being given advice, it’s always good to know. But the intent behind it, at least that which I can perceive and goddammit I’m not bright, but I didn’t just fall off the poutine truck, can piss me off. Like people giving advice for the mere purpose of showing off how much they know, or because they wanna tell you how to live or because they just disagree with how you’re currently going about things, and want you to follow their lead. In short, advice given without the genuine desire to help and serves some egoistical purpose altogether can kiss my damn ass.

Unsolicited advice pisses me off to no end. I’m a very self-sufficient person, and I honestly don’t need or want help most of the time. But, when I do need help, I can admit it; I always ask questions when I need help and ask for advice when I want/need it. So when somebody gives me advice or help that I didn’t ask for, I get almost immediately annoyed.

I think I react so strongly when this happens because of my dad. He tends to think that he knows everything about everything and I couldn’t possibly have common sense or any intelligence or world experience whatsoever. So he gives me “help” and “advice” on literally every freaking thing. Just last night, I was feeling sick, so I told him I didn’t want to eat right then. He proceeded to run through the entire contents of our fridge and pantry, though I interrupted him more than once to say “I know you’re just trying to help, but it has nothing to do with the food, my stomach is just upset,” which he completely ignored. He’s done that ever since I can remember, so I guess I’ve just come to react very negatively to that kind of thing.

On the one hand it is just somebody caring and wanting to help, and that sentiment is sweet. On the other hand, the implication is that the person thinks they somehow know your situation better than you do yourself, or just thinks they have better judgement than you, which is irritating.

Only if it’s bad advice or obvious (implying that you are a moron) advice.

@Symbeline Mmmmm…poutine.