NSFW: Do you think that availability of explicit material online has an effect on dating expectations?
I’ve seen it all. So has everybody.
I think that exposure to all that is out there has made me more comfortable in asking for what I desire, but it hasn’t made me a raging maniac who is only after one thing!
Talking with a guy tonight. He said, “I kind of wish they’d put clohes back on.” and we came up with the idea of a website: Kardashians in Carhartts
So, you? Do you expect a p0rn story, or has it changed at all?
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One amusing thing it has done is made men very uncomfortable with their penises, supposedly.
Yay! I love drunk Blue!
But really, you’ve seen it all?? Wow. That’s impressive. I still manage to be surprised, impressed, pleased, and horrified by the things that are out there. Do I just accidentally visit weirder sites than you or something?
Do I expect a porn story? Depends on which porno. But sort of, and not really. I expect there to be a lot more times where we’re about to have sex, but then one of us says something stupid, so sex is now Off, and we will be watching some of the poorer episodes of Family Guy. And there’s probably a lot more cat hair around, and a lot less variety in sex toys. But there’s usually a good amount of fucking, which is not dissimilar from porn, so…
No @Aethelflaed, you’re right. I haven’t seen it all. Just when you think you’ve found the very pit of fetishism… somebody comes along and devotes a site to “that” with bunny costumes.
@Blueroses It’s really not the fetishes, you know? It’s the stuff that isn’t labeled. The stuff that should be TW’d, the “forced seductions”, the moments of “wooooah, that’s not what this fetish is. My god, do they even have a name for that? Either way, put that shit in your description so I know what I’m getting myself into, ffs!”.
I think such material has a desensitizing aspect. It’s horrible.
They should put some clothes back on, keep them on, and then learn how to excite each other intellectually and emotionally again.
@digitalimpression Yes, viewing p0rn does desensitize you while you look at that. The question is, do you separate that from your realistic expectations?
@Blueroses There is no separation necessary. Believe it or not, I don’t watch the stuff. Yes, I have in the past.. but after quite a few life lessons I’ve learned that my wife deserves the attention.. not my monitor. My relationship is much healthier without that crap. It’s all realistic.
I hope that answers your question.
What the hell does “desensitize” even mean in this context?
Even before pornography was made so readily accessible online to anyone with half a brain to get to it, it always kind of unnerved me at the expectations it creates in some people. Like some think that porn is what actual sex is like, and that they base their relationship experiences/anticipations around what is shown in porn. Of course, that doesn’t always happen, and I’d have to be very conceited and have very little faith in mankind to think everyone does it. But the truth of the matter is that the media and entertainment do have a very powerful grasp on the influence of people and what each gender should ’‘act like’’, and it sucks because a lot of that influence can destroy the realism of life and the experiences it has to offer.
I’m actually a big fan of porn, but to me it’s always been a fun thing I don’t take seriously outside of when I’m checking it out.
That said, dragons fucking cars.
Yup, Rule 34, making sure you can never sleep again, at least partially because you can’t stop laughing.
I wonder if rule 34 has its own rule 34 somewhere.
Ah, when Rule 34 gets together with Rule 34, and they go forth and multiply and get little baby Яule 1156.
Oh absolutely. I am always dismayed that there are no sexy dark elves out there.
@ragingloli I think you’re looking in the wrong places.
Ehhhhhh…. I mean maybe for some people it has, or younger people.
Personally, I don’t expect pornographic stories to play out with my SO or a date or what have you. Sometimes it’s nice to “role play” or have kinky sex, but I have to imagine that would have been the case without porn having been seen at some point too. There may be some moves or what have you that I’ve seen in porn that I’m interested in trying, but the reality of actual love making/sex is that it isn’t very much like professionally done porn… and the only ones who don’t realize that are the people who aren’t having sex. I mean at various points in my life I watched quite a bit of porn, but when I started having girlfriends or what have you, you find a lot of the things they do to be frankly impractical for either party enjoying the act… and more built around facilitating good camera angles.
Could be why I strongly favor “amateur” porn that gets uploaded to the internet. Aside from the women looking way better in my opinion, it’s usually clear that there’s a romantic relation between the couple and the sex is more realistic to what my own real life experiences are.
I do not think porn is a desensitizing thing, when used responsibly. As with any hobby or what have you, when abused it can become problematic in many aspects of your life. If you spend 3 hours a day looking at porn, it’s probably going to be a problem in your real life sex life with your SO… But I don’t frankly see that as any different than spending too much time playing video games or talking on Facebook.
I wonder what hormones were in the milk the guys (actors) drank as a child that resulted in no body hair, looong equipment, and the lack of ability to reach orgasm. If all a woman has seen is the stuff on the internet she’d be sorely disappointed in me.
OTH she’d have no fear of fighting her gag reflex.
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