Actually, my point is not so much about gender as it is about expectations. Conventional wisdom has it that males aged 16–24 tend to be oafish and callow, and on the whole, they are. Conventional wisdom about females aged 14–17 is that they are airheads—think of John Updike’s short story A & P, in which the protagonist says,
You never know for sure how girls’ minds work (do you really think it’s a mind in there or just a little buzz like a bee in a glass jar?)
I used to more or less agree with that view, but my recent admittedly limited interactions with girls this age lead me to believe they’ve got more going on upstairs than conventional wisdom gives them credit for.
As for women in their early 20’s, conventional wisdom seems to give them a pass. In a way, it’s worse than excusing males with “boys will be boys”, because at least that view admits that there is something that needs excusing. Women in their 20’s can get away with anything except breaking the arbitrary rules they impose on each other, and nobody bats an eye.
Case in point (here’s a specific example for you, @nikipedia): I went out for a drink last night. The place was pretty busy for a Tuesday. I found myself sitting next to three attractive young women at the bar (one was conventionally pretty, the other two were hot in ways only connoisseurs like myself appreciate). So anyway, the “pretty” one taps me on the shoulder and suggests I buy the three of them shots. No how do you do, no introduction, just exercising her God-given right to demand free drinks from older guys because she’s young and cute, I guess. But I am not feeling inclined to be anybody’s patsy that night, so I refuse, and suggest she buy me a shot instead. Then I turn to her friends and ask if they are softball players. (They had the build for it—fine big strapping country gals visiting their skinny city cousin, from the look of them. Damn, maybe I should’ve bought the drinks. One chance in a thousand is better than nothing, considering the payoff. Having principles can be a real pain sometimes.) But the pretty one butts in and announces, “No! You can’t talk to us if you don’t buy us drinks. I’m gonna be a bitch about this. The bitch wall is down!”, and illustrates this with a downward motion of her arm, like the descending gate at her favorite store at the mall at closing time. She insists that her friends follow her lead on this, and they do, though to be fair, they seem embarrassed, and one of them mutters “Sorry” as I left, which I do after telling the pretty one that her behavior displayed a lack of self-respect.