I know that when you get worried about someone, the worry can feed on itself. It gets worse and worse as you gnaw over things in your mind and you make up story after story to explain what is going on.
In my experience, it isn’t very long before the stories you make up are far worse than reality. In my experience, we end up driving ourselves crazy over what we worry about.
The solution is to make yourself stop doing this. Stop making up stories about what he might be thinking. Recognize that you are doing this and then tell yourself that you don’t know what he is thinking and you are only going to make it worse if you act based on something you only think he is thinking.
The only thing you can do is wait until you can talk to him and find out what is really going on in his head. You have to stop reading tea leaves. You have to stop making up his thoughts. You have to accept that you don’t know and won’t know until you talk to him.
You shouldn’t feel bad about doing this. Most of us do it, even as we get into our fifties and sixties. The lesson I’m trying to teach you is hard to learn. I still make this mistake when my emotions get tied up with someone and I don’t have any way of finding out what is going on.
But it helps, I find, if I can manage to make myself wait, and if I can tell myself not to believe anything I made up to explain this. I tell myself to wait. Waiting is the hardest. Very very hard. But there really is no choice. You can either wait and drive yourself crazy, or you can wait and refuse to drive yourself crazy. Or you can get so anxious and desperate that you try to force yourself on him, and that is pretty much guaranteed to make things worse.
So. Patience. Tell your mind it’s ok to freak out, but it’s probably nothing. And even if it is something, you’ll deal with it when you find out. You can do nothing until you find out, and if you try to make things happen sooner, the outcome will certainly be bad.
Patience. I know that’s not what you want, but it’s what there is.