What's the worst you've ever stuck your foot in your mouth?

About 10 years ago when I worked in a high end gift shop in my tourist community.
I was just about to close shop at 5 o’clock and was busily getting the store ready for closing when a couple walked in.
I was thinking to myself ” Oh fuck..more customers” haha and…. drum roll….,
blurted out, and how are you FUCKS today? 0-O
Talk about a Freudian slip!

The husband burst out laughing,the wife was not amused!

Last year I was working as a front desk intern at a very well-known family-oriented theme park resort (wink, wink) and I happened to be working the late shift one night when this guest came up to me at the desk requesting a new room. He seemed kind of upset and, in my capacity as a front desk agent, I asked him in my utmost concerned voice “Is everything ok, sir?” He brushed me off with a curt yes and I should’ve left it at that (and normally I would’ve because it’s not in my nature to pry), but since it was during the peak holiday season and we didn’t have a whole lot of rooms available, I was required to ask him because I had to have a good reason for giving him the additional room. So I asked him if there was something wrong with his current room and if there was anything I could to fix whatever issue he was having with it, to which he replied “Can you fix my wife?” He was a stern and imposing guy and his tone clearly said “this is none of your business.” I was so mortified and embarrassed and I wished the ground would just swallow me up right there and then. Needless to say, there wasn’t much talking involved after that and I worked whatever “magic” I had to make sure I found him a room lol

@jordym84 Haha…I would have started cracking jokes and taken my chances.
I have an uncanny knack for being able to crack the most hardened faces and soften the most grumpy of people, most of the time anyway. :-D

@Dutchess_III Awww….but you did nothing wrong, how could you know?
I am striving for “Granny Clampett ” in my old age…I plan on being a feisty and shockingly brazen old woman. lol

@Coloma I wish I had that knack with strangers lol In my group of friends I’m the witty one, always cracking jokes and taking every chance I can get to make them laugh, but when it comes to strangers I’m very …what’s the word I’m looking for?... “formal,” especially at work, and I swear my brain freezes and I forget the English language when the opportunity to make a joke presents itself haha

@jordym84 Hah…well…I’m not always sure if the responses I get are based on some sort of breakthrough of humor, or….the fact that I have stunned somebody with my brazen approach.
Maybe the reason they smile and laugh is because they are stunned out of their grumpy stupor. lol

Of course I couldn’t have known but still…...

@Coloma Hahahaha well at least it does the trick lol

I can barely bare to type this, but the other day, I was in a bank queue.

There was a woman there with her toddler, about two. Plus she was about 8 months pregnant. The toddler was running about playing, and being naughty. We were both smiling at her, and I said, gosh and another on the way and she said no.

Ugh I just cringe. Never again. Even if the waters break in front of me I will just say, “You need the toilet?”

@Shippy “Even if the waters break in front of me I will just say, ‘You need the toilet?’” – that is priceless!!!!! hahahahaha

@jordym84 Well, you gotta be sure you know!

@Shippy Two of my female cousins looked 12 months pregnant after they gave birth, so never assume that anyone is preggers. Ouch!

Actually, I have a couple of male relatives who _also look pregnant._

@Kardamom Omg! loll

I think we ALL fall into that trap one time in our lives, @Shippy!! One time is enough to break us forever! I did it once.

I am a lifelong comic book fan, but haven’t been to a comic book convention is about twenty years.

Finally, last Summer, I went to one with the intention of meeting some of the artists. I was all excited to see a table for Mike Weringo, one of my favorite artists. So I went straight up to the man at the table and said, “It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr. Weringo. I really enjoy your work”. To which the man replied, “I’m his brother, Mike died a few years back”.

He was less than thrilled with my gaff and I slinked away figuring it’ll be another twenty years before I return.

Please, don’t beat yourself up over it. I’ve done it so many times it has caused me to be overly cautious. For example, there was a woman in my hometown who was a pillar of the community. I would see her around at different events every few months. I hadn’t seen her in some time and in she walked one afternoon into my office.

She was so skinny she looked like death warmed over. I was afraid to say anything. I just knew in my heart she was sick. We talked and conversed about our families and the weather and she finally said, “BK, aren’t you going to ask me how my new diet is going?”

@bkcunningham sorry…that made me LOL!!! And it’s a bitch when you can’t tell the truth!