Does my son know I love him when I kiss him?
Asked by
pleiades (
6617)
February 3rd, 2013
He’s soon to be 10 months! And goddamn I’m on a roller coaster ride. Now, William is seemingly a momma’s boy, but when I kiss him and he’s on his way to sleep, does he feel loved?
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13 Answers
I’ve never been a parent, but I can’t imagine his not knowing at some level that any contact you make with him is a sign of love, affection and being there for him.
No he doesn’t know
Let’s be honest, he’s still in development. He feels the affection and love but he doesn’t know it consciously
He can’t even conceive of the concept of love yet, so how could he know you love him? Love is an abstract concept. People who are twenty don’t know what it is. How would a kid of 10 months know?
On the other hand, he feels your lips. He feels the physical warmth. Humans are programmed to respond to touch, and to recognize those they feel safe with. He feels safe with you. He feels your touch. Some would argue that’s what love is, anyway. On that level, he does know your love.
@burntbonez I disagree. People in their twenties may not have a grasp yet on romantic love, but feeling loved by family is a different matter altogether. I believe a 10 month old can experience and appreciate his mother’s love, even if he hasn’t the words or brain capacity to consciously acknowledge “this is my being loved”.
I think they know, because when we give a kiss it is meant as a good thing.
I watched this episode of psychologists doing research on babies and children and it involved puppets that were nice to eachother or mean to eachother and even in the eye movements of babies they could tell that babies knew who was being “nice” or had “mean” intentions so to speak.
The study I saw on tv had babies from 3 months and on, this explains it
Does he know? Does it matter? Babies need physical affection.
Yes – he knows he is secure and loved.
YES, he picks up the loving vibes!
He does. A baby is so sensitive to all that is going on around him :)). Plus kids are very forgiving!
PBS: Infant’s Emotional Milestones (And click on the image-link that says “ABC’s of Child Development” to see the physical, intellectual, and communicatory milestones as well.) Based on this checklist, I’d say he does and he has for at least a few months. (Birth-3 months, can be comforted by familiar adults, comforted by physical touch, can smile and show pleasure—understands and appreciates shows of affection.) Looked it up just to have some other source with a timeline to answer with. In the communication milestones, birth-3 months they already react to pitch, tone, intonation of voices. 3–6 months, exchange sounds, facial expressions, and gestures in a rudimentary conversation.
My gut response before checking a checklist was simply, of course he does. He hasn’t read Shakespeare yet, but no one is expecting him to have. He has an instinctual sense of love, and ten months experience with a family who loves him a great deal and shows this in various ways. One way is in kissing him goodnight, so this is one of the ways he understands love.
I hope you talk to him too and tell him he is loved.
He knows it is you, he is bonded with you, he is reassured in your presence. he would miss you if you were not present for his routine with you. He may be half asleep when you kiss him, but he can subconsciously smell your scent and know he is safe and secure because you are there.
He doesn’t have words yet, but if he could express himself, he would call it love.
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