How do we have really good days in the face of adversity?

I am so grateful for so many things and so clear about no longer needing to brood, but cannot explain exactly how I arrived at this state of grace.

Having been a serious worrier for decades, I can now look back and see just how well that worked. This is muzzy, I realize, but I can now choose my attitude.

See PM

@gailcalled Iam reading May Sarton’s journals now and she seems to have arrived at a similar place to you in her 60s and 70s. I am not there yet.

I did get some wonderfully supportive notes from my son which helps but not really lifted up yet.

Maybe because even when we’re at our lowest, something in us knows it will pass and that the good things in our life will overwhelm the bad.

I don’t know. Do we have good days in the face of adversity?

I find that the good days come when I’ve made progress vis a vis the adversity. Doing anything to move towards my goals makes me feel better. Even giving up. Sometimes there’s nothing like admitting you’ve met your match to make you feel such relief. The odd thing is, that when you feel that relief, it often gives you the power you need to overcome the adversity.

I’m a great believer in giving up. It’s worked well for me in my life. This idea that I must do this or I must do that or I’m a failure unworthy of life really gets in my way a lot. Finally giving up, and then discovering the world doesn’t end, and indeed I am much relieved at no longer having to fight often fills me with buoyancy. That buoyancy is often sufficient to float me over the barrier in my way.

Count your blessings!!! It works for me, and I’ve dealt with my mom’s cancer, my husbands poor health, my dog dying and my car breaking down. It can always be worse.

Sometimes it helps to see how bad it really can be, and realize how privileged we really are. I look at pictures from the refugee camps in the middle East, or the starving people of Africa. I cry and thank my lucky stars.

Keep taking one step in front of the other with the optimistic belief things will get better. So far it’s worked. I think trying to live in the moment and avoiding catastrophising helps too.

By concentrating on the small things and the beauties of nature.

While I was very bitter for a very long time about the time I’ve “lost” and the pain I’ve been through, these days I see things in a more positive light. I LOVE my life here at college and I never would have appreciated it so much without having the shitty times to compare to. My full, exciting life now is just so different from that year I spent sitting at home recovering from my surgeries.

I still have adversity, but everything except the most dire of problems seems like small beans now. I guess you could say I have developed perspective.