Should there be a better way to decide who hosts a 10k, 20k, etc. milestone celebration?

I am never in time or I would like to do it sometimes.

Last year I felt terrible for the jelly whose accomplishment, and I do believe these milestones are just that, was ignored. I also realize some jellies would rather just opt out of having a party altogether.

Great question @filmfann. I’ve wondered if there was some sort of unspoken protocol about this. I sort of assumed that only people in the Mansion could initiate parties, for instance, but maybe I’m wrong. I’d gladly throw a party for a jelly whom I knew (so that I could get the theme right) but I would be more hesitant to do so for someone I don’t feel I know very well.

If there is a protocol, it is a poorly understood one, from my point of view. New jellies have no idea what parties or mansions are, nor do they know why other jellies’ tentacles might be ruffled by having the wrong person throw a party, or having a party thrown in the wrong way. They just know that there’s a celebration of a landmark, and that that’s a fun thing. I think anyone should be able to do it at any time… and why do we even care if there is more than one?

If I notice a jelly I know well getting close to the milestones, I go looking for another jelly that they are close with and then we conspire to have that jelly host the party. I’ll push them over the edge when that jelly is ready with the question. Not exactly how things are supposed to be, but I think it’s more special if a special jelly hosts the party. I’ve checked with the mods and they are okay with it if I don’t abuse it. I’ve seen some real nice parties come about this way.

The only thing I can think of is that if someone is watching another’s lurve total because they want to give a party they can alert @augustlan that they would like to do it (first come first served) and people can check with @auggie if such a request is in place before throwing the party? They can then send that person a message if it hasn’t happened when the lurve meter ticks over to see if they still plan to give a party. The danger is, people may not log in and then the person is partyless until it’s resolved.

So I suspect what we are doing is the best option. @bookish1 there is no protocol. If you see someone has clicked over, you can throw the party. If two parties go up, we (mods) delete the last to go up.

The other thing is the person close to having a party could alert a favourite jelly and ask them to hold their party. That’s happened before too and it makes sense.

I have definitely ruffled feathers by throwing too many parties, but I don’t want anyone left out.
@Bellatrix I tried to find other jellies in Chat, but of course no one goes there.

Why would anyone mind if you host one or 20 parties? That doesn’t make any sense to me. What am I missing? Because of the lurve you get?

@bkcunningham there was even a question about “Why is this person hosting so many parties?”

I appreciated all three of my “party hosts” & had no clue they were going to ask them, came as a pleasant surprise on each occasion. Waiting with mild anticipation to see who gets the gig if & when I eventually get to 40K, who knows, maybe they’re not even a member yet.

Honestly, I don’t care who hosts a party. I don’t really notice. I’ve tried to host a few parties, but I’ve almost always been too late. I’ve asked duplicate questions enough times to realize that you have to do that game where you get the question ready and then go push the person over the top and then immediately host the question. I have a hard time believing anyone would not have their party because people here seem so anxious to host. But maybe you should wait a day, @filmfann, before hosting, so that other people get a chance. At least wait a few hours.

@wundayatta I agree, but as I said, I have seen people waiting 2 days with no recognition, but I won’t throw a party for a while now. Let’s hope someone else notices others achievements.

I didn’t realize there was an issue with who hosts the celebrations. There should be an easy solution though. Perhaps there could be a rotation of volunteers who are interested in hosting the parties. You could have a signup and a monthly cutoff date.

Would devising a new way to host parties change the original plan for the site? I’ve seen discussion where things can’t be changed from the intent of Ben and Andrew for the forum. Would this count?

@filmfann PM them.

I have been to all three of your parties this weekend @filmfann and didn’t even notice you threw all of them. I just look to see who the party is for. I think it is silly if people get upset over who hosts a party. I for one appreciate that you noticed because sometimes I don’t even look over to the side and see who has reached 10k, 20k, etc.

@filmfann “there was even a question about “Why is this person hosting so many parties?””

Was this today? I don’t see it in Meta. Jeepers, I don’t understand why anyone would do that.

@filmfann You could be social chairman for, say, 6 months and then get someone else to take over for the next 6 months. I agree something needs to be done. I feel regret if someone has passed the 10K by a month or more and there’s been no party. It feels too high-schoolish if it appears there are cliques that control these things and some people are left out.

Or it could be that the last person to be honored with a party gets to host the next party. If they don’t host the party within a described amount of time, it is a free for all.

I think the system works fine.

Anybody reaches a milestone and nobody “notices”, maybe nobody cares.

Anybody bitches and moans about you hosting “too many parties”, tell them to relax, have a Coke, get a life and go fuck themselves.

@filmfann Are you speaking about this question that I asked 2 years ago? just wanted to throw that out there in case someone got the wrong idea about why I asked that question (because apparently from what I’m reading here some do have the wrong idea).

There really isn’t any way to have a set system, so it’s always just first-come, first-served. Except for in that odd case that @jonsblond references, no one has ever minded. It’s a fun time, no matter who hosts! :)

@filmfann, like @augustlan stated, it’s a fun time, no mater who hosts the party. I was glad you were around to host the dutchess’ party. It was a good 10-minutes and no one had thrown a party (which I thought was unusal). Little ol’ me was in the middle of composing a party theme when you saved my the day. Thanks!;-)

We should choose by Dueling pistols while in a balloon.

I’m glad you noticed @filmfann and organised a party for our lovely jellies. As far as I’m concerned whoever notices and does it is fine. I don’t think we can appoint people to this role and it would spoil the spontaneity of the whole thing.

I never liked the idea of points and ‘parties’ for points. I may have commented on the first few back when it was new, and I think I thanked those who posted when I hit 10k back in the day; but otherwise, I don’t participate because I’d just as soon we didn’t do it.

I like that it’s first-come-first-served. I could be wrong, but I’d be shocked if anyone was ever completely overlooked.

I’ve only manged to host two in four-plus years. Last one was for @MRSHINYSHOES.

I think some people have favorites and they want them to host the party. But if the favorite doesn’t get there in time, they’re out of luck. I think that some people make their own luck. I’ve heard from people who tell me they are sitting their waiting for the event to happen. I’ve noticed that on my events, somehow my lurve totals manage to speed up in the last few hours. It’s very peculiar.

Some people get excited by these things. We have no other allowable way to recognize each other’s contributions, so we use this. The law of unintended consequences, I guess.

Eh I denno.

It’s like when you’re in school, and on Valentine’s, everybody gets a card from a student, except you. So then you just get one from the teacher. this never happened to me

On the other hand, getting fuck all sucks. Gimme somethin’, asswipe!

OK I’m still stuck on the pushing people over the edge.

First there is graphic imagery this statement illicts. Second, jellies withhold lurve for the sole purpose of being able to push them over?

Do you have a lurve meter for all the lurve you hand out? At which milestone do you use the lurve?

This takes jellying to a completely different level for me.

Maybe I am on the outskirts and don’t know the depths of fluthering but as long as the party thrower knows enough to give you a fabuluous theme what is the issue?

@Adirondackwannabe So that’s what happened, eh? I was wondering why someone lurved two old questions of mine to get me over the line. Mystery solved :)

If anyone complains about who is throwing the party, they are really ungrateful and rude! I never notice scores so I am hopeless but @filmfann you are very observant and I think that is nice. Don’t let anyone deter you, keep up the good work.

I did it (or tried to do it) once and my question posted, about 3 people responded and then it disappeared and I saw that someone else posted hosting that same jelly’s party right after. I got a pm from a mod that said that the two questions (mine and the other hoster) were written at the same time and the other person’s was first, which made zero sense because mine was posted first when the other person’s was not posted at all. After that, I decided never to try and just leave the hosting to others.

@wildpotato Yeah. If we max out on the GA’s we can give GQ’s up to about 10 I think.

Seriously, those people need to get lives.

That is so sweet of you @filmfann I wondered who held whose party. I cant wait for mine!! I have a feeling I know who will throw it. But ooh will have to wait and see!!!

Thanks @filmfann):

I’ve run into the same problem…ready to throw a party but someone beats me to it. I also don’t want to be presumptive.

I’ve been involved in friendly duels for the race to throw a party. It’s a rush like getting in the last bid on an ebay item.
I think it’s always nice to have true fluther-friends throw the bash but…

If somebody’s milestone is getting missed, that’s a different story. Everyone should be recognized here and if you see the milestone in the feed with no corresponding meta-fete, go ahead and host one! The worst that can happen is you are a duplicate and will be deleted but the person will still have their due.

I never found Will Work for Chocolate’s 20K party!

@Dutchess_III I was in on that bid. Hell, that girl started here just before I did and her controversial stances shot her up the charts!

Ya…she’s a show off! But I wanted to be there!