How do I talk my husband into a new dog?
Ever since we had to let our poor old dog go last year, I’ve been wanting another dog and searching for the right one. I have found several sweet little dogs that need homes, but one in particular has really caught my eye and I desperately want him!
My husband doesn’t really want more animals since we already have two cats.
Any suggestions on how I can talk him into it?
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get rid of one cat :(? lol its a terrible suggestion but maybe it will work
@JoeyOhSoClever Oh, hell no! I’m a total cat person, and those two furballs are family! :)
Write I really really want a dog, and I think it would be good for the boys on a piece of paper, an put it in and envelope. Seal the envelope and write “This is something I really want badly” on the envelope and leave it out for him.
Explain why having a dog is different. Tell him you’ll do the walking and feeding. And tell him you can do what you want so STFU. But nicer. You know.
@WillWorkForChocolate, maybe he’s afraid of the pain and hurt happening again. Talk honestly with him about the loving contribution your old dog made to the family and although he can never be replaced, it is time to fill that hole with some puppy love.
That or you just withhold sex until he says get a new dog.
@WillWorkForChocolate thats true :). Well just let him know how much you want a dog and how it would mean so much if he would want to welcome the dog as well. If he knows how much it means to you he should have no problem saying yes right?
@tinyfaery LMAO! He’s currently out of town, so when he calls before bed tonight, I plan to say, “I’m rescuing a homeless poodle, mmkay?” He’s going to immediately say no, then my real work begins. He already knows he doesn’t have to do any of the “doggy maintenence” so that’s not an issue. It’s just the issue with having three animals in one house that bothers him. I’m thinking that begging and particular sexual favors will be involved.
BTW, here is a pic of the precious, tiny boy. Damn, I want this dog!
Aww, that face alone should win him over.
He’s a weiner if he doesn’t love that dog. He might give you crap at first, but he’ll come around
Aww the puppy looks lost and sad and he needs you to love him. If he doesn’t have to do any of the work and you can afford the vet bills, I think you should rescue him.
I think you know how to pull out all your feminine wiles to persuade him that this is a good idea. I would tell him how much you miss having a dog and especially when he is away working, you would feel so much more secure having a dog in the house. The dog is therefore a security measure as well as a member of the family. Is he going away more for work? That would help your cause.
Hahaha, I don’t think a 5 pound dog would offer much in the way of security.
Yep. He’s already saying no, and I’ve entered “pitiful begging wife” mode and emailed him the picture. Let the games begin.
Awwwwwww!
I know where Rockwall is.
It can bark. That will allow you to call the police or grab the baseball bat. That’s a security mechanism!
Have you asked him why he doesn’t want another dog? Is it the shedding, the barking, or medical cost or him getting attached or does he feel like he’s being disloyal to your previous dog? Maybe he’s waiting for all your animals to pass away so you are both free to travel without having to worry about pets left away at home.
If that face didn’t get him to soften up then there is something more.
@Pandora I think he was actually a little relieved when our sick dog was put to sleep, because it meant we were down to the two cats. He seriously loves animals, he just doesn’t like having them in the house.
@Yetanotheruser Either we’ve talked about you knowing the area before, or I’m having a weird feeling of deja vu.
Meanwhile, I’m typing with one hand after mutilating one of my fingers a few minutes ago. Sorry if I typo, lol.
NSFW. Blow jobs with swallowing 7 days a week twice on hump days for one month straight. Non-negotiable.
Of course if you are like me, then this won’t be able to apply because this will already apply as a freebie.
If explaining to your husband how you feel about my getting another dog and why this is so important to you, then your relationship may have problems greater than the issue about the dog.
Of course you must listen to his reasons why he would be unhappy to get another dog. I hope you can discuss this successfully and reach a decision with which you both can feel comfortable.
I’d bring the dog home before he gets back. You can make a deal to bring him back if your husband really balks, but I don’t think he will when he meets the dog. He’s a sweetheart. (And your husband will be too.)
Why even ask, the poor little thing needs love and you’ve got loads so bundle him up and bring him home…But..if you really want to get him onside this is what we did…my children introduced our dog,Teddy, to our dissenter, put together a slide show with compelling arguments and signed a contract of commitment of care for the dog as well as parting with $100 each. He didn’t stand a chance!
For the first time ever, I am in complete and total agreement with @tinyfaery !
This happened with us, only in reverse & I charmed the knickers off her to get my way, quite literally in fact. I won in the end, because i’m a persuasive sonbitch & quite the spoit brat if I don’t get my way…many of toys tossed from pram.
You are old enough to decide for yourself. Unless of course it chews his slippers!
Just bring it home…..9 years ago, after a final bout with our sweet, but destructive, black labs (They ate the entire back yard, including the swingset!!!,) I told my husband “NO MORE DOGS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!!!”
A couple of months go buy. He comes into my office at the shop, says, “I have something to show you.” Alarms went off in my head. They always go off when he says, “Everything is fine,” or “I know what I’m doing,” or “I have an idea,” or “I have something to show you.”
He took me out to the Suburban, opened the back door, and there, on the floorboard, was the most beautiful, sad, scared German Shepherd I’d ever seen. She was a year, maybe two. I was gone from that moment on.
Crap! Missed the edit window. Here is my dog the second day or so that we had her. She has nothing to do with the 27 amendments!
She was rather abused, btw. The guy who had her originally had purchased her to replace one of his viscous guard dogs….but she doesn’t have a viscous bone in her body, so he got all disgusted and was going to just “get rid” of her.
But I’ll tell….he never waited to put her to the test. That dog can flat beat Cujo’s pants off if it’s called for. I’ve seen it in her twice, once protecting “her” cat, and another time protecting all of us from two redneck neighbor’s dogs who tried to attack us. Dakota kicked BOTH their asses (and they weren’t little dogs) and sent them crying for home. Then she just laid down on the deck, heaved a sigh, put her head down like, ‘Well, that was fun. But I’m done now.”
And…I don’t know what all he taught her, but she sure learned some shit! Like, running toward me, at a dead run, then LEAPING in the air and planting all four feet in my chest…it sent me flying! She was all “Didn’t I do good??” all laughing and tongue hanging out. She was so confused those first few weeks. We were discouraging her from doing the “attack” moves she’d been praised for doing before, and was praised for doing the things the Other Guy didn’t like, like licking us!
She is. And she’s getting old. :( So sad, so sad.
Guys, I would love to just go adopt the dog and ask forgiveness later, but it all centers around a certain kind of marital trust and respect. It would be somewhat like me sabotaging my husband’s condoms because I’m desperate for one more baby and he’s not.
I’m trying to talk him into the dog, but if he stands firm with his “no” then I have to respect him on that.
@WillWorkForChocolate It is true. If he is going to be unhappy about the idea then trying to push the idea on him won’t work so @WillWorkForChocolate that’s why you now have to be @WillWorkForPuppy and do whatever you have to that makes your husband happy usually it is a big purchase that involves sex or money so be prepared for that :/ and make him fall in love with the puppy because you love the puppy and you love to please him, so you both get something in return.
@WillWorkForChocolate – I really don’t understand, he has the veto power over you? So if he really really wanted something that you didn’t, you would have veto power over him? I don’t like veto power. If I or my mate really really want something then we get it, that to me is the mutual respect.
@rooeytoo I get what you are saying but I also get what @WillWorkForChocolate is saying. Maybe in your relationship @rooetoo the respect level is a little different and tolerable from @WillWorkForChocolate.‘s
My sister and her husband have a relationship where if she wants something or he wants something they get it they do not ask eachother, I personally think from the outside their relationship is totally one sided and I often wonder why they are together because they never look like they work together as a team..do you get me?
The husband is a borderline hoarder and has clogged every inch of space inside and out of their brand new home with stuff he buys, while she just sits back and allows him to run her over, so she got a dog out of the deal because she said so and I am sorry but the poor dog has suffered living in what to me is an unstable, drama filled home and it is a pitbull of all the breeds to have :/ the dog is already showing signs of mistrust because their is no one in the home that it can depend on. Her kids and shes got 3 boys, can play both parents against eachother because they always play for seperate teams. They all disrespect eachother even the dog shows signs of it. At least this is what I see.
My relationship was different. My husband has passed away but when he was alive we had 10 years of happy married life and 19 years altogether, I never had this problem up until the last car that we bought when my husband was sick and I made the bad choice to make the decision without my husband one that I would find out later that he was not happy with and all it did was cause unwanted tension between us until the day he could no longer mentally think about it and then he died. My daughter is a very respectful girl and actually just left for a march break trip. I said to her, “don’t cause trouble” she looked at me, shes 17 and said “mom, when have you ever known me to cause trouble.” It’s true she has been the perfect kid.
The poor decision I made has haunted me until this day going over and over in my mind about the what ifs and should haves, of course that is the price one pays when tragedy befalls upon them.
Does this make any sense?
@nofurbelowsbatgirl – I understand what you are saying but no it doesn’t make sense to me. But that doesn’t mean it wasn’t right for you. And when people are sick, sometimes things bother them that wouldn’t under normal circumstances. It gave him something to be angry about instead of his condition or instead of hating the people around him because he was sick and they weren’t. People are too damned complicated for me. I guess in my case my husband knows that I will never be without critters. When I moved to Australia from USA to be with him, I brought my dog with me. Cost me a fortune, I could have flown a couple of times first class for what it cost to get that dog here. But I loved him and wouldn’t move without him and my mate understands that. He is pretty much the same. So we have 2 dogs and 2 birds and will never be without. So for me it is hard to understand a husband who doesn’t want a dog. Hell, I would find a new dog and a new husband too! ;-)
@rooeytoo No, it’s not like that. He’s not my dictator. If I want something like a new movie or a purse, I go get it. If he wants do do something else to his hobby car, he buys the parts for it. But a dog is different. A dog is a serious commitment, and having one would impact him, whether he takes part in its care or not. Say we’re out at his grandmother’s house and make a spontaneous decision to spend the night. If we had a dog waiting at home, we couldn’t do that. If I go out of town with a girlfriend and the dog gets sick, my husband would have to take care of him and clean up his messes.
I can’t just go against his wishes if he really doesn’t want to be “tied down” with another dog. It would be very selfish of me to force that on him.
I think he might be starting to cave… not positive but I’ve got my fingers crossed!
@rooeytoo that makes sense to me. But I dont mean it is about dictatorship. I mean it is about you and your partners idea of what a commitment is and if the two of you as a couple can handle that commitment together, or if like in my sisters relationship for example it is not really about working together but if she wants a dog she goes and gets it, if her husband wants 565 cans of tomatoe juice he goes and gets them, they dont ask eachother but it does affect the household, but like you that is their understanding. To me when I am on the outside looking in on my sisters relationship I suppose they are on a different type of “team” than I am and it works for them, but structurally, I need a different team. I need cooperation, team players and some management, after all my house is much like running a business.
I wanted more kids, my husband did’nt. I tried to talk him into it but he never caved, but in all other aspects he was a perfect man for me, I am not one for change, I would of been foolish to just pack up and leave and set sail for a mediocre man who would agree to impregnate me every 12 months like some kind of underground baby experiment, it would be like leaving a great paying job with great pay for less :/ thats just mho. :)
@WillWorkForChocolate Hope you get the puppy.
@nofurbelowsbatgirl – takes 2 to make a baby, only one to get a puppy!!! i.e. no comparison in my mind. :-)
He’s caving? Did you cry? Way to go!
This poor man. The world’s women ganging up on him to help change his mind. My husband is such a softie that it absolutely kills him if I cry. With the exception of sad films, ambulances and soppy songs or news stories about awful things, I rarely cry so if I do he knows I am seriously upset.
No, I didn’t cry, I just keep telling him how happy it would make me and how perfect this dog is for us:
Only 5 pounds, so he’ll travel easily with us
Already housetrained
Already neutered
Already good with cats
Only 5 adorable tiny pounds! Did I mention that already?
@Bellatrix Oh and we know you ladies use tears to slay us, we just don’t have a defense.
@Adirondackwannabe actually some might but I don’t. I can’t think of anything I want so much that I would need to be so manipulative. It feels abusive you know? I know it hurts him so why would I use it against him? I wouldn’t want him to behave that way towards me so I don’t do it to him. I agree with @WillWorkForChocolate, if it’s a joint commitment we make a joint decision. A dog is a huge commitment. Equivalent to having a child given you will probably have to care for it for 10 plus years. If @WillWorkForChocolate can persuade her husband in a fair way, he won’t feel duped and will be much more accepting of their new fur baby. I hope she can because I know she really, really wants this puppy!
@Bellatrix I was kidding. I don’t care for manipulative people. I know what you mean. Your hubby is a lucky guy.
I knew you weren’t serious but I think it’s an important point. Manipulating or bullying him into giving in may have negative long term consequences and thank you @Adirondackwannabe.
@Bellatrix I sometimes let the mouth go without engaging the brain. And you’re welcome.:)
Yeah, I don’t think that guilting him into getting a dog would be the answer. My mom was guilted into letting my sister get a dog and for 3 years now all my mom does is complain about the dog. It’s one thing to get an annoyed parent another thing to get an annoyed spouse for several years. You can get over the disappointment of not having a dog but can you trust that he will not feel resentful everyday he sees the dog. Maybe even hate it. My mom is the same way. She loves animals, she just doesn’t like living with them. For a little while its ok with her but not 365 days a year.
That can cause real problems in your marriage because he may feel you care more about what you want than how he feels. Before you think, well he is doing the same. Consider that you do still have two cats. Maybe revisit the idea once the cats are gone. He may be willing to compromise once there are less animals in the home.
@Bellatrix and @Pandora that is along the lines of what I was trying to say to @rooeytoo in my long comments. It usually happens. I have a problem over explaining myself to a point that it can become complicated sometimes :/
I blame all my personality quirks on the anti psychotic meds. lol.
Well, he took too damn long to start giving in, and little Bones’ adoption will be finalized tomorrow morning with another family. I’m sort of evil and hoping it falls through so I can snatch him up.
:( maybe it wasn’t meant to be.
Awww, at least Bones has a new family. It gives you time to try to convince your husband a dog would be a great addition to your family. Can you have a day-trip to the pound?
@Bellatrix I’m looking on petfinder.com to see what I can find. I’m fairly picky about any animal I adopt, but I do want a rescue/pound pup instead of a puppy mill dog.
Is there a pound near you? I’m just thinking if you can convince him to go along with you, and he has a heart, it might help change his mind. If I took my husband to the pound I’m pretty sure I would have a yard full of dogs.
There is a nearby pound, but they only have huge dogs, and we can’t have those in the house. There are several nearby rescues, though, that have little ones for us to meet.
Well, you have a foot in the door now, though.
He’s definitely caving, he just said he wants me to wait until we move in a couple months. I’m so frigging impatient!
:-) Well that’s a yes! You can have a dog when you move. YAY!
Score! Wait…was this right after Good Sex? Cause he could change his mind again…
I think you should just be paitent and wait.
So…
Do we have a new dog or not?
Not yet. Waiting til we get moved.
Update: We’re not moved yet, but my husband fell in love with a rescue dog at Petsmart today. We are now the proud humans of a sweet German Shepherd mix, named Tank!
It’s quite funny that we adopted a huge dog, since we had agreed we’d eventually get a small dog, like under 12 pounds. Ummmm….. HUGE difference, here!
Congratulations! How old is he?
He’s only one. And I’ll get pics up in a few.
Great, I am so pleased for you. I couldn’t live without my dogs!
He is a handsome boy! I love the one floppy ear, gives him great character. And he has eyes like my dog, looks like there is someone home in there! I would take him to obedience school even if he is obedient. It is a good bonding exercise for you and the dog and extra training never hurts! Congrats again, looks like the husband is completely convinced now too!
LOL, both of his ears are fairly floppy when he’s relaxed; that one ear popping up seems to be his alert look. He heard another dog bark right before I took that picture.
Oh, and you guys should have seen my husband shopping for his stuff! He picked out huge chew bones, a brush, his food bowls… and Tank picked out his own bed and “lovey.” It was funny! He sniffed around and laid down in the bed he wanted, and grabbed his own “lovey” (stuffed animal toy) off a shelf.
Looks like @Tank did the choosing! Congo rats from yet another doggie luvver!
@Yetanotheruser It was pretty perfect, the way things played out. It was the first time my husband agreed to look at dogs and see if any “caught his eye,” didn’t like any at the first place we looked, then at the second place here’s this beautiful dog that I’ve never before seen on any rescue site, and my husband can’t quit staring at him…
I still think it’s funny that we’d discussed getting a tiny female, and ended up with a jumbo male, but we’re both in love with this dog!
Cool. Many happy years ahead!
Awwww….. exactly the baby dog I would have picked! He looks like he will be a ‘bestie’ forever.
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