Hugo Chavez (pbuh) has perished. Will you spare a few seconds to mourn this great man and hero of the poor?

Here is a summary of this Great Man’s life, courtesy of Encyclopedia Dramatica.

Hugo Chávez was formerly the President of Venezuela, hero and famous IRL troll. He was elected president of Venezuela forever since 1998 and on. According to Conservapedia he was a repressive dictator, so you can ignore this statement.

Also, he was a suspected member of the Ultraviolet News Network. He actually drank two dozen cups of hydrogen peroxide a day and has a bad cocaine habit given by Evo Morales in exchange of the oil, medical resources that he gifts to Bolivia.

Chávez was born in Florida to Josefina Chavez and Samuel Prescott Bush. Samuel Bush was a railroad executive and an asswipe who never acknowledged responsibility for lil Hugo’s birth. So Chávez had to flee the country since his older brother Prescott Bush put a price on his head. Thus, Chavez took revenge on our beloved ex-president, W.

“I’m going to fill the pages of the history, by myself because Mr. Bush, Washington, the CIA, the FBI, la KGB, and the NBA are trying to kill me.„

—Hugo Chavez, Speaking about USA

Actually, he was butthurt because his parents were lazy * expletive* who didn’t do * expletive * to earn any money, so he hated everybody with money, so his master plan is to put everybody in the same echonomic level he was when he was young: Extreme Poverty

Relationship with Fidel Castro
“Hmmm… your chest is hard, Chavito!”

Chavez declared Cuban President Fidel Castro as his BFF and their relationship has been much discussed. Castro has helped Chavez build a powerful army of chupacabras. According to Ann Coulter, they’re two gayboys, but that frigid * expletive * says that about every liberal guy on this planet.

What is beyond doubt is that once Fidel would be six feet under, Chavez would take over as the leading critic of the U.S., and so Yankees will never get to live in a world without hate from poor, repressed banana republics.