Why not more then friends?

Welcome to fluther. It’s always tough to cross that line. You’re putting yourself out there too. You have to open yourself up to the idea of getting hurt. But believe me, if it works with the right person the pluses way outways the negatives.

Two separate questions here.

1) If you are feeling desire, then that is what you are feeling.

2) This is trickier. Try some very subtle small steps. It seems difficult because you cannot go back if it turns out you are misguided.

No I am not feeling desire. We are friends because there was no initial attraction. Just appreciation.

I have put out tiny feelers. Awkwardness and or humorous retorts. I think we are past the point we could be more then friends. We both know too much about each others sex life and dating habits.

Also nothing will come about organically between us.

It is odd but we are both very careful to maintain physical distance between each other.

If you are not feeling desire and know that nothing with come about organically(?) between you two (if I understand what you mean), then why do you want to explore more than friendship? Doesn’t that translate into physical intimacy?

I don’t know why I want to. I just have entertained the idea from time to time and dismissed it.

This oddity has me more then confused. Frustrated may be somewhat appropriate, as I have now started comparing potential or my current mate to my friend and the others consistently fall short. Yet when I try to fantasize about him I fail miserably. He isn’t, not attractive. Many would consider him attractive. I am completely flummoxed and have no idea how to progress.

Then just be content to examine your fantasies.

@Red_Turtle You need to resolve why you aren’t happy with your current mate. That’s priority one before you do anything. I didn’t realize you were with someone.

Are you content to examine your fantasies gailcalled?

We are talking about you and not me, remember.

We aren’t serious andironackwannabe, just a passing thing, I am ready to move on. But will let things play out as they normally do. I am and will always be faithful in the meantime.

Gailcalled: True, but would you give me advice you would not take yourself?

Okay, let me chew on that for a bit.
And you came close on the spelling. :)

@Red Turtle: If you hang around Fluther for a while, you will see that I never give advice that I would not apply to myself.

@Red_Turtle Don’t spit into the wind, or tug on Superman’s cape, or mess with Gail.

AdironDackwannabe. Your handle put me in mind of a Cathy comic strip.

Gailcalled I do appreciate you answering me. It is not an answer that will work for me as I have tried it and am unimpressed by the results.

P.S. Did I offend a pillar of the community on my first question?

Nice to see new people on fluther. I like Cathy. For you question, You have to decide what it’s worth. And don’t settle. Open yourself up to anything but never settle for less than great.

@Red_Turtle go a head, respond.

Thank you for the welcome. I like Cathy too.

I have never settled long term so we are in agreement. Whether or not I have unrealistic expectations is another question entirely. LOL

I’m a guy but that comic touches me. We all have our challenges in life. Expectations are a bitch.