Is there an appropriate way to word this emailed invitation?
My sister is having a baby in May and since she has a two year-old she is not interested in having a shower. I asked if she would like to celebrate this baby with a girls night out to dinner and she liked the idea. Most of the women attending are family and I am totally comfortable telling them that I would like everyone to pay for their own meal, and I will cover the mother-to-be and provide some kind of special dessert. Honestly, unless we get pizza from Little Caesar’s I cannot afford to buy everyone dinner. There are two women I don’t know very well and I want to convey this information to them without sounding like a total cheapskate. Any ideas for appropriate wording for the invitation?
Observing members:
0
Composing members:
0
8 Answers
I would call each woman and explain to them individually what you have told us. See how they respond.
Then you can issue the written invitation to everyone in a straightforward manner.
How about “You are invited to a Dutch Treat Girls’ Night Out in honor of…” ? ” I will provide dessert.”
I think most people know that with today’s economy, it would cost a fortune to take everyone out to dinner and I think all will understand you can’t pay for everyone’s dinner.
I agree with @gailcalled about calling first and then following up with an email.
“In following up with our phone conversation, we have decided to have a girls night out for SIL on April 3, 2013 at La Chateau Food at 6 p.m.to celebrate the newborn coming her way. Just a reminder that you are on your own for dinner, but I’ll be providing the desert. Please RSVP by April 1.”
Oops, meant sister not SIL.
Taking off on what @gailcalled suggested, call several of the potential invitees and ask them if they’ll participate in a little test (in my business, we call this “focus testing”). Tell them you’d like to email them 3 versions of an invitation and get their feedback. Send them within a day or two of your call. At best, one of the invitations will get a unanimous vote and you can send that to everybody. More likely, you’ll get suggestions for improving them.
While you would think it would be clear that you can’t pay for everyone’s meal, you are right to be specific. Some years ago I suggested my family (including brothers and sisters) go to a restaurant to celebrate my then very young son’s birthday. I had meant for us all to pay for our own meals and we provided cake. The people attending knew we were young parents with a mortgage but some left us holding a very large bill. So, yes, be very clear.
A phone call would be nice but if not I like @janbb‘s idea.
I’m a little confused… why does she not want a shower since she has a 2-year-old?
Is she saying that she doesn’t want gifts because she already has everything she needs?
If that’s the case, then you might explain that each person paying for the meal is in lieu of gifts?
@Bellatrix ouch! Kind of makes the point, doesn’t it. Thanks for sharing.
Answer this question 
Composing members:
0
