When going through a rough period in your life, did you dive into some sort of activity to help cope?

Oh absolutely. Being a usually-active college student stuck at home for a year and a half while I got my surgeries could have been a total nightmare without my hobbies.

During that time I took up: jewelry-making, glass-fusing, needlefelting, bird-watching, exercising (what I could)

I stayed distracted and that’s the only thing that kept me sane.

Sure, I tried learning some Cherokee, I wrote poetry and journaled, and just worked on me.

Unfortunately no. I am a bit of a loner, well, a lot really. I cant put myself in social situations, because i can’t cope with groups. I can’t make friends. The worst time in my life so far, i drowned my sorrows and ended up in hospital, alone, upset.

We be good to see other peoples answers, just in case. Good question.

Excercise. The universal attitude improver. The best stress reducer. The answer to just about everything.

I did. When I saw how badly I was sinking, I pledged myself to do three completely new things, and do them by myself, not waiting or asking for company. It took a real push because what I felt most like doing was isolating and wallowing. Somewhere in my head I knew I really wanted to be healthier, and I decided to put my confidence in my own initiative this time instead of going around in circles with a therapist

•  I joined the Scottish society on the strength of my great-granny’s nationality, started going to meetings, and put in some volunteer time. I’m not a very sociable or group-oriented person, and that cost me some real effort.
•  I chose and bought and planted flowers in our yard for the first time, doing all the prep work and planning and tending. I was new at it and not very good, but it was excellent therapy.
•  I signed up for and took a series of language classes. That opened up some new territory as well.

I joined a singles walking group two days after my spouse split and that saved me.

Yes. I am at the gym. I am working on myself. One day I will come out being a better person. I have a vision of who I want to be. Most days I am sure it is unachievable, other days I think, DAMN! It’s really working. I’m hoping I’ll be as good as new one day. Results are so fricken slow and I am impatient most days. I should probably work on that too. Err.. :/

Yes, that was how I got hooked on Fluther. I was out in Seattle visiting my Mom in the hospital and later taking care of her at home, and I needed a distraction from all the stress!

I’m painting.

A lot.

Just bought an easel, too.

I feel the same way about House Cleaning as @josie does about “Exercise”.

”The universal attitude improver. The best stress reducer. The answer to just about everything.”

@cookieman Me, too!!

@cookieman You are welcome at my house anytime!

I might retreat to my cave for a little while and watch TV, listen to music and feel sorry for myself for a little while, usually I’m strong enough to get back on the mouse wheel and start to work on improving things. I agree exercise helps me but I usually have to lift my mood enough to be motivated to take such action.

Drinking. I became a professional. ~

I immersed myself in the JFK assassination. What a complex web of theories and evidence! It took my mind from the horrors of my life at that time.

After two lumpectomies and during the following chemo and radiation, I was given my first computer and found it a wonderful distraction. In those days, I could call tech. support for free and talk to some nice guy in Santa Fe for a long time.

I also tried to teach myself classical Greek, with less success. My brother chose the textbook, which turned out to be the size of a small door. I learned the alphabet and the accents; then started on the verb, “to teach.” After staggering through the present tense, I distracted myself by counting the verb endings and prefix changes, including dozens of the imperative.

There were well over 300 forms to memorize for that one verb alone. So that was that. Ya sou.

I run, write, make music, and roller blade.

I got a puppy, there. That fixed it.

I’m being challenged right now more than I can ever remember with a crippling medical condition. I have to wait 2 more months before a surgical attempt to correct my problem will be attempted. I work full time but just about every spare minute for the last two weeks I’ve been preparing an 810 square foot area around our house for paving stones. Excavating 8 inches of dirt with pick, shovel, sifter and two wheel barrels is hard manual labor but great therapy. After 8 plus hours of that I’m far too exhausted to feel sorry for myself. HA!

@gondwanalon “Excavating 8 inches of dirt with pick, shovel, sifter and two wheel barrels is hard manual labor but great therapy. After 8 plus hours of that I’m far too exhausted to feel sorry for myself.”
what

the

hell?

wheelbarrows?

What I do is sink into more of the stuff that I like. Reading, horror movies or video games. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. But mostly, in my case, it’s a matter of eventually having to stand up to my shit instead of trying to avoid it. Not saying this is the case for anybody else here, talking about me.
My hobbies and passions are good for coping yes, and when I’m really mad or upset I like going for hour long walks. Helps to make crappy emotions more tolerable when you’re done. But in my mind I’m all like, yeah after that, I’ll be better, which isn’t true. However, indeed, it helps to cope. Kinda like bouncing on a weak spring and all.
Drinking is another thing I did, although I wouldn’t call that coping. It makes things worse, although it takes a while to realize this, and then when you do realize and don’t stop cuz you don’t give a shit and like the escape, it makes everything even worse, again. So fuck drinking, although I have to admit, it’s often in the back of my mind as the perfect solution. lol I mean how long will the urges stick around? Do I have to have stopped drinking for 100 years or what? yeah, standing up to one’s demons and all that damn crap But fuck demons.

Oh yes, several times. As a child, I drew a lot and would train my dog(s) to do tricks. As a teen, I went through drug abuse. I still drew sketches and started writing poetry. I played guitar and piano (not knowing how but going by ear, I still do). I also danced for, usually, up to 5 hours a night. I started cycling a lot in my early adulthood. As an adult, I’ve done all the same except for the drug abuse. After I got really sick, which lasted around 7–8 years, I couldn’t do much for physical stuff. I got into video gaming and mmporg. I still draw and play around with my guitar and electric keyboard. I like to work on wood projects. Now, that I’m getting better (health-wise), I’m starting to exercise. I quit smoking so exercise really helps with that at times. I’m hoping to get my bicycle tuned back up in the next while. Oh, I’ve also always cleaned when stressed. I will clean for hours on end.

There are so many little things that helped me cope but those are the biggest ones.

@gondwanalon, I’m sorry to hear about your situation. I really hope everything works out. Don’t push yourself so hard, friend.

For me, getting my dog. I had him for a good 16 years.

I came out to my family about being molested, was going through a depression and my grandpa died all at the same time. First time that I experienced death of someone close to me.

Anyhow, my partner got him for me. Pets can really help you get out of a funk rather quickly.

@Jeruba Wheelbarrows smeelbarrows, check out my Gorilla Cart (an early picture of a very small area of my project).

@woodcutter I’m just a guy who loves to do hard manual labor. I never get to do anything physical in my profession.

@gondwanalon, your gorilla cart is very cool. I was just asking if “wheelbarrows” was what you meant because I wasn’t sure.

Without knowing what your medical situation is, I think all that physical activity sounds like a really healthy response, as long as you don’t hurt yourself. I’m sorry for your troubles and hope for a successful treatment.

Barrels versus barrows. That is what she’s asking. You misspelled wheelbarrow.

@bkcunningham and @Jeruba Thank you for pointing out my mistake. I’ll try not to let it happen again. I’ve always been sloppy with writing and yet proper spelling and grammar is important to me.

FYI: My health problem is atrial fibrillation. My cardiologist said that it is OK to do about anything as long as I don’t let my heart rate get above 200 bpm. I can’t complain but I do suffer from feeling miserable and exhausted. My project is helping me to keep my sanity. HA!

^^^Sorry about your atrial fib. My mother had an ablation (zap) done when she was ninety and lived for six more years.

However, I do not have any heart problems and wouldn’t dream of letting my heart rate get anywhere near 200 bpm.

@gailcalled People can live with a-fib for many decades as long as the heart is otherwise strong and healthy. My heart is so strong that it laughs at a-fib and has been going in and out of a-fib since 2001 (mostly in normal rhythm). I’ve had 8 to 10 cardioversions (I lost count) and one radio frequency catheter ablation (June 2010) that kept my heart beating normally for 2½ years. The Wolf Minimaze Procedure is my last chance to once again walk among the living. It will take place in Indianapolis on July 9th. That’s seems like an eternity of waiting to me. I’ve got to think up some more projects to work on pretty quick before I go into brain fibrillation. HA!

Cautionary story. I wish I had some words of comfort, unless, of course, you want to come east and rebuild my dry stone walls for me in the pastures and woods. They used to contain the cows, but the cows have come home (and not to my house), so that is only a memory now.

Rebuilding dry stone walls sounds like great fun. Before my current state of health, I built a over 100 yard long 3 to 5 foot tall retaining wall around our house out of “one-man” stones (many of the stones were larger that one-man size). It felt like I was building the pyramids. Friends and family can’t believe that I did it all myself. But I did love the process of building the wall. I honestly found such joy in the hard labor.

^^^ Your heart may be dickey, but there seems to be nothing wrong with your lower back. How did you cart one-man stones around?

Here’s something for you to drool over.

Oh I do love that wall. It is so beautiful!

How did I move 3 large piles of one-man rocks? I did it slowly totally while totally destroying one wheelbarrow. I also built a sled that I pulled the stones like ancient Egyptian slaves did or did in the movies. The really big rocks I would roll and or rock into position. Many of the stones required thought, planning, time and a lot of effort to get them into the right spot. Fun stuff.

FYI: On my current project I’m just doing the grunt site preparation for paving stones for fun and to save money. I’m having professional pavers do the installation. That has to be done correctly for structural integrity, looks and drainage and those are skills that I don’t have.