Who’s name is on the lease? That person will be legally responsible for making sure that the rent gets paid in full, and on time, even if the others are paying part of the rent. If the others fail to pay their portion, the legal blame will still fall upon the person who’s name is on the lease, so make sure that you put it in writing on your room mate agreement (signed by all of you) exactly how much each of you owe, who that money gets sent to, whether or not it needs to be paid with a check or if cash is acceptable, who is in charge of making the actual payment to the landlord (and keeping a record of how much was paid, by whom, and on what date). I watch a lot of Judge Judy and these things often don’t happen or they don’t get written down, at which time things turn into she said, she said, which doesn’t help much in a court of law.
Next, set up a list of chores and figure out some way to divide them up fairly. They can either all be set up on a rotating basis on a calendar, or they can be chosen by each of you (some people hate to vacuum, others are neat freaks and would prefer to do more of the routine cleaning, so it can be done correctly according to their standards, so figure out what kind of people you’re dealing with first, then make the list).
Figure out who, other than the roomates will be allowed to come into your home and who is allowed to spend the night (other friends, family members, dates, one night stands, pets, etc.) and where those potential guests will sleep (on the couch, in a guest room, in the room of the roomate who they belong to). Figure out some type of time table for how long certain people are allowed to stay in your home, whether it’s only up until midnight, or as long as a month, depending upon who the guest(s) are.
If you will be sharing a land line, figure out how that bill will be divided up and who will be responsible for actually paying it on time.
If you will be sharing a communal TV or stereo or other such items, make sure that the usage is doled out equitably (it doesn’t have to the same amount of time, but it needs to be agreeable to everyone ahead of time).
Figure out if each of you is willing or not, to let the others roam freely into their rooms (such as if someone is vacuuming or picking up laundry, or borrowing someone’s computer if they were allowed to do so).
Put together a communal items list and create a budget for those items: toilet paper, paper towels, tape, foil, ziplock bags, plastic wrap, tools, cleaning supplies and equipment, toilet plunger, shower curtain, dish soap, etc. Some of these items will be one time purchases such as a tool kit, scissors or a vacuum cleaner. Other items like toilet paper and paper towels will be regular purchases. Make a list, a budget and figure out who will be responsible for replacing items when they run out.
How will you use your refrigerator, freezer and pantry? Will everyone pitch in monetarily for food? Will each of you buy your own food? Will everybody be able to share the food, even if someone else paid for it? Will you have your own separate sections of the fridge, freezer and pantry? Should the room mates put their name on their own food? Who’s responsibility will it be to throw out rotten food? Will it be OK for each person to decide what’s rotten (even if it’s not their own food) and be able to throw it out? If some food is communal (like ketchup or milk or coffee) put together a budget for that and decide who is responsible for replacing the communal items (the person who used it up, or someone who is on grocery store duty?)
Will there be a grocery store duty? If so, will that duty get divided up or will a specific person or persons be responsible for making grocery store purchases. If food is delivered to the house, will the pizza or Chinese food payment be divided up or will someone take care of that payment?
How clean is clean? There needs to be some type of standards for how clean (and how often things actually get cleaned, picked up, or just straightened). Know that neatniks will be the only ones who care about this, but they will be the ones who are maddened the most and will most likely be the ones who do most of the work. Slobs don’t care about the filth, the clutter or the mess, but they don’t like being told to clean up the mess by the neatniks. So figure out how clean is clean, and who will be responsible for cleaning up what areas.
In the kitchen: Please don’t leave jelly or crumbs on the counter. Please don’t leave dirty dishes in the sink. Please empty the dishwasher when the dishes are done. Put stuff where it goes. Put stuff away, don’t leave it sitting around. If you drink the last of the milk, buy a new carton on the same day or alert someone on shopping duty that you are out of milk. Put a shopping list on a white board, chalk board or notepad that everyone can easily see, and write down the items that need to be replaced.
In the bathroom, don’t leave dirty clothes or wet towels on the floor. Wipe down the counter and the sink so there isn’t hair, makeup, snot, water or vomit left for someone else to clean up. Have a regular bathroom cleaning duty chore in which the toilet, sink and tub get scrubbed and the hair is vacuumed up of the floor and the floor is mopped and the mirrors and faucets are cleaned. Ask before you borrow someone’s shampoo. If you use the last of the toilet paper, replace the roll IMMEDIATELY (I can’t emphasize this rule enough). Don’t let your supply of toilet paper run out before you buy new rolls. If you see that the supply is running low, right it down on the shopping list in the kitchen. Make sure you have a little trash can in your bathroom for when someone needs to replace a feminine product or blow their nose (ever been to someone’s house where they didn’t have that little trash can? Oh the horror, the horror!) Also, make sure there is a toilet plunger in your bathroom and that everyone knows how to use it. If there are shared medicines such as aspirin, Pepto Bismol, feminine hygiene products, band aids, make those items part of your “communal items” budget and figure out who is responsible for paying for and re-stocking those items. Keep a roll of paper towels in the cabinet under the sink, this makes it easier to keep things clean and dry in the first place.
Who is responsible for doing laundry. Will each person only do her own or will there be a laundry chore duty assigned to someone, or will laundry be done by everyone on a rotating basis. If there are pay washers and dryers on site, who will be responsible for paying to use the machines? If laundry has to be done offsite, who will be responsible for making sure it gets done?
Cooking. Will cooking be part of the chore assignments or will one person be the chosen cook while the others clean up afterward, or will everyone be responsible for their own meals? If there is a cooking chore assignment, there needs to be a food budget as well.
Figure out how much noise is too much noise, and how late certain noises (such as TV, music, sexual escapades, yakking on the phone) can go on.
Make sure that if there are any problems with your house/apartment, that those issues are documented with photos and written correspondence (or a record of phone calls made, or e-mails/texts sent) to the landlord immediately. Again, I’m channeling Judge Judy.
Figure out ahead of time what will happen if one of the room mates needs to “break the lease” or move out (or is asked to move out) who then is responsible for what, money wise and lease name wise, unpaid rent etc.
Will you allow smoking, drinking, illegal drug use in your apartment? What about other people who come into your home? Is it OK for them to do any of these things at all, or just outside on the patio, or not at all?
Figure out which of you is allowed to use items brought into the home, initially, by a specific person. Who does the vacuum belong to? How about the dishes, the pots and pans, the glasses, the kitchen utensils etc. Will those items be considered communal and can be used by each of you? If the person who owns the item leaves, will the item go with that person or stay in the apartment? If an item that belongs to one person gets damaged by one of the other 3, who will be responsible for replacing or repairing that item? Will it be paid for the the owner, the person who broke the item, or part of a group repair budget?
To make things easier for all of you, have some type of a message board where each of you will leave your current contact information. If you are going to class or work or over to your cousin’s house, be polite and let the others know where you are and when you expect to be back (with pertinent phone numbers and addresses if necessary). It’s not fun when some out of town relative calls about an emergency and you don’t know where that room mate is or when they’ll be back. This is not about control, it’s about politeness and convenience and peace of mind.
By the way, you should see the size of the Fluther Mansion Room Mate Agreement
Now watch this Room Mate Agreement clip.
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