Is there a way to remove sexual desire?

Um, why don’t you pay attention to the women you find attractive, and determine what they find attractive in a man. You can work on yourself, as those women you find attractive are working on themselves. They do not accidentally become the ideal. You are confused that the ideal does not find you attractive when you decide to spend zero effort in improving yourself.

@Imadethisupwithnoforethought

I have a general idea of what they find attractive but even if I spent a long time changing (or trying to) change my physical appearance, the intellectual connection would probably not be there.

It would be nice if my brain was a big arduino or something that I could reprogram

There is also only so much you can do to change yourself within the limits of your genetics, and based on most of the other members of my family, there’s not a lot I could do.

@XOIIO I spent two hours in the gym today, read up on the physics of N-Loops in time dilation scenarios, and browsed through some Dostoevsky books I have not got around to reading. I am halfway through a six pack and don’t feel that tired.

It does sound tempting sometimes, doesn’t it? :-/ I’ve heard about saltpeter, but I think it might be a myth…

@bookish1 Well, I do have the stuff to make potassium nitrate sitting around XD

Oy, first things first: please stop with the “woe is me” attitude, us ladies find that rather unappealing. Now, since there’s no proven way to achieve what you’re asking for in your question as far as I know, my next advice is to work on yourself as @Imadethisupwithnoforethought said above. However, don’t do it with the goal of attracting a mate. Instead, do it for yourself, and you’ll be surprised at how wonderful you’ll feel and how that’ll inevitably draw people to you. People who take care of themselves are happier and happy people are more appealing, regardless of their physical attributes. You can’t change your genetics, but you can surely find a work-around, as many people have. Go to the gym, treat yourself to something that makes you happy every so often, wear clothes that you like, work on your confidence, etc. I’ve found that the secret to a happy life is to either work on your flaws if they make you so unhappy or, if they can’t be fixed, learn to accept and live with them. Moping around is not going to help you in any way, shape, or form.

“If a man makes a sort of jelly with the juices of the fruit cassia fistula and eugenic jambolina and mixes the powder of the plants soma, veronia anthelminica, eclipta prostata, lohopajuihirka, and applies this mixture to the yoni of a woman with whom he is about to have intercourse, he will instantly cease to love her.” For a good time, you could read God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater by Kurt Vonnegut.

Also, saltpeter.

If you are looking for a project, PM me. I’m working on something big and could use your help.

@rexacoracofalipitorius Well whaddaya know, I have those ingredients in my cubbord!

“I am bored out of my freeing mind right now, I was asleep all day, going to be up all night”

I’m surprised your question isn’t more concerned with removing the desire to pursue that lifestyle. I’m no expert, but experience tells me that if you don’t work nights, then your schedule is a sign of depression.

May I recommend sunshine, and walking around the block for fifteen minutes every morning… and evening, combined with fresh fruit and vegetable diet. Otherwise I fear your future posts will become more dour by the day. If you must stay up at night, then consider trading some of the time spent on the internet for sitting under a tree and looking up at the stars. You may find the answers you seek just by doing that.

Fellow gangly nerd here that isn’t classically attractive. I know where you are coming from and it is rough. I have never asked a woman out. I am not pretty enough to pull that off. I have never actually tried but I am pretty sure it wouldn’t work.

But I am pretty funny so I have that going for me. So I get action from friends with pity and girls I meet at dorky shit like Ruby and Linux meetups. See if you have anything like Freegeek where you live and volunteer there. I got tons of ass when I worked there.

@johnpowell Sadly I live in Canada, and in Saskatoon for that matter, and there is nothing like that around here which is sad, I wish I lived in an area with a local hackerspace or maker shed or whatever, but there’s nothing here :/

Have you considered trying to start something there? Try to get donated parts when people upgrade their computers and give them to poor people that don’t have computers.

It is something to do. And you might meet some people along the way that are open to intercourse.

@XOIIO
Upon reading your question, I first thought you were desperate to remove your desires.
But the writing implies that you are more focused on your self-esteem than your desire itself.
In fact I wish to remove my desires too, partly because of the same reason, and partly because the desire itself is just way too annoying to live with…..
I think your age-seemingly college student- is when one goes through up-and-downs in confidence.. You will start feeling normal in no time.. And I guarantee you, you will be able to
find women you like, that like you also.

By the way what is it like to live in Saskatoon? Is the population that small? I wish to live there.. I like countrysides. I live in Korea, by the way, which is too many people in one place.

@dumitus I’m actually 19, no college or anything yet.

It’s kinda small I guess. can’t remember the population, but definitely smaller than korea, its a nice place to live, we got lots of parks and stuff, a nice river path, all that crap

Picture Barbara’s bush…all desire immediately extinguished, unless you’re into large hedges.

There is a way to shut off desire – and I’ve spoken to at least 4 men who had it done! It works so well it’s like flipping a logic bit on your arduino. You don’t want to do it.

The guys all have advanced prostate cancer, PCa, that cannot be treated surgically and has metastasized to other areas of the body. Prostate cancer basically feeds on testosterone, T. They get a special treatment that stops the production of T to starve the PCa. It’s a form of chemical castration. The injection lowers their T levels to near zero which also completely eliminates their sexual desire. Some of the guys complain of hot flashes, man boobs, and joke about their new found enjoyment of daytime TV and inability to pass up a shoe sale.
Sadly they are short timers but manage to handle the situation with a grace beyond my comprehension.

Are you reasonably good with an arduino? Can you program? Someone might be looking for that skill.

You’re 19, not going to college, and sleeping all day. Do you have a job outside of the home? If not, how exactly do you think you’re going to meet women? And, if you have no job, you definitely won’t be landing any women. Unattractive men and “nerdy” men get pretty girls all the time – because they try. So, try!

You should know that complaining about only being attracted to women with the “ideal body,” whatever that is, will probably get you no sympathy from the ladies. I’d also caution against using terms like “getting a lot of ass,” as a fellow jelly did here. Referring to women as “ass” will get you nowhere.

@LuckyGuy What a buzz kill.

@livelaughlove21 You’d think it would be a buzz kill to talk with them but actually it is a lot of fun!
The guys are some of the funniest I’ve ever met. I don’t know how they do it. They figure every day is a bonus and get the most out of every one. They do more in a day than I do in a week. Certainly they have more fun.

@livelaughlove21 Well, I had a job but was let go recently and am looking. As far as sleeping all day, I just get into that pattern when I have nothing to do. I really should just move to Australia since I always end up sleeping during the day here, that might help lol

@XOIIO Why are you not in college? Dude that’s the single best thing you could do right now to meet women. Sitting around at home isn’t going to a damn thing but make you feel lonely and depressed.

I know you’re not a virgin – I remember reading your post-coital thread a few years ago. How did you meet that girl? School, right? Get your ass in college instead of trying to find ways to kill your dick.

Try some new and time-consuming skills; many women love men who can cook.

Like How to poach the perfect egg,

Swap knees with me for a week; you will be too uncomfortable to think about sex or much of anything else other than how to walk up and down stairs wiithout Advil.

Consider doing something for someone else. I bet that there are hundreds of people in Saskatoon who could use some help from a young guy with a strong back.

http://www.volunteersaskatoon.com/search_postings.php

@gailcalled gave you a great resource! I revisited this Q because I was going to suggest volunteering someplace. She beat me to it.

Over the years I’ve discovered that you meet the nicest folks when volunteering.

While I don’t agree that your reason for attending college should be to meet girls, that is a nice bonus. Plus, an education would make it easier to find good employment, and you can be more productive during the day. Keeping yourself busy is a great way to overcome depression. Fake it until you make it.

Additonally, life isn’t all about getting girls. You need to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else. Having a partner doesn’t make all of your problems go away. In fact, it often creates bigger problems.

Also there is Meetup Saskatoon .

There is maker space in my town. All of the participants 30? 40? are Y chromosome holders.

Shoot honey, all of us have felt unattractive at some point in our lives. As I’ve stated many times, a lot of good women are looking for good men, looks aren’t always that important to those of us who aren’t 100% superficial. I promise.

Be confident, be funny, and be yourself. I personally have a ‘thing’ for nerdles and brainiacs (saying that with love) and I know a lot of women that do as well.

Don’t forget, all of us gal folks are hot for the boys on The Big Bang Theory! And the current 2 Sherlock Holimes, as well as the old and new Star Trek fellas. Smart and funny are huuuuuuge turn-ons for a lot of females.

We also like ‘em chubby and bald and nerdy, and short and older, and with big honkers, examples being Patrick Stewart, Alan Rickman, Ben Kingsley, Eugene Levy, Jason Alexander, Jon Cryer, Billy Connolly, Billy Gardell, Steve Carel, John Lennon, Ringo Starr, Jon Stewart, Leonard Nimoy, Zachary Quinto, Tim McGee and Ducky from NCIS, shall I continue???

@Kardamom
Yes I think males have more chances of being attractive with their male qualities such as sense of humor, ability-whether to make money or in a certain area-, whereas females seem to be stuck between prettiness and non-prettiness in physical apperance, where they have not many options left for them.. which is pretty inequal…. Of course not every man only craves for physical beauty in women but it’s true that that’s the first thing that comes into our cursed sight..