Are you likely to stray or be faithful in this situation?

Siblings don’t act the same way. In many cases, they act as total opposites.

If she is worried, then it is an indication that she is looking for excuses not to be close with you. This is just a rationalization.

Dump her now. She is already looking for a way out.

I’m female, and I was talking about a work colleague, as mentioned in the description.

I think if she is concerned, they need to have a conversation about it.

When people see cheating and the repercussions, often they are virulently opposed to it. I can only imagine the pain he felt at his brother and his lover’s betrayals.

@Headhurts – sorry, your gender was not evident to me.

@KNOWITALL She has spoken to him about it and he said he knows how it feels, so he wouldn’t do it. I tend to agree with him. It makes me glad I have no siblings.

@elbanditoroso It’s not about me anyway though.

I’m confused. Because someone cheated ON HIM he is likely to cheat on her? That doesn’t make any sense to me.

Umm, yeah. I’m with @Judi on this one.

@Headhurts Good. My husband saw his mom and dad cheat and the havoc it created, the divorce, the re-marriages, etc…we promised each other before we married that that’s the one thing we would never do to each other, even if we had to be painfully honest.

I wonder if it has affected the boyfriend’s posessiveness or jealousy at this point, things like that though.

@KNOWITALL I’m not sure to be honest. I don’t really mix with the others at work. I just was listening to her today. Think they have been together a few month. They were having the ex talk and he told her this. She’s scared that because of what his brother did, it would make him want to hurt in the same way.

@Headhurts Maybe just tell her to keep dating and keep her eyes open for any warning signs.

There is always a chance that some one will cheat on someone else, but you can’t know it until you get to know them.

IMO being related is not an indicator of action/inaction.

I have a brother and a sister and we all have our own personality and peccadillos. Just because my brother is rather fond of tequila doesn’t mean my sister is. He has addiction problems, neither she nor I do. She loves softball, both of us brothers detest it. One of us has been married twice and the others only once.

Another way to look at it is how upset it made him and hopefully, knowing how painful it is, he is the kind of person that would not wish to inflict that on another.

@rojo Thank you.

I don’t think it’s a positive or a negative that his ex went off with his brother. He might think “wow, how screwed that she and he did that” or he may think “oh good, relationships are so impermanent, I’ll get a bit on the side while I have a new girlfriend.”

Work colleague is A.

His new girlfriend is B.

A’s ex is C.

A’s brother is D.

C is now dating D.

A has disowned D.

have I got this right so far?

If so, who is now worried about who cheating with whom?

@gailcalled C is worried about D cheating. lol

Are you sure? It sounded (as much as I could parse the text) as though B were worried about A.

@gailcalled Arghhh, of course. B is worried about A cheating because of the relationship with C and D.

Work colleague is A
New boyfriend is B
B’s ex is C
B’s brother is D
C is now with D
A is worried B will leave her for “X” because C left B for D.

or D stole C if you prefer and because B & D are brothers what one does the other is likely to try.

I was confused reading that! @rojo is right though.

I’d be more likely to be faithful. I’d be more likely to be faithful regardless of what anyone else had done or was doing. It’s all about the individual.

It wouldn’t MAKE him do anything.

No, that makes no sense.

My brother is a cheater…he has cheated in almost all of his relationships. My sister and I? Never.

His actions don’t really indicate whether he’d be faithful or not. I would be reluctant to step into that situation with disowned brothers and sneaky wives. There is way too my drama in that situation and I see heartache in your future. I suggest laying off the marriage question for a couple years to see how the drama pans out. I frankly would wait about 5 years. I know that seems like a long time but a year married with all of that drama will seem like an eternity.

Someone who has been hurt by a cheating SO would be less likely to cheat on his SO, I would think. Actually each person is different, so you can’t judge by someone else. I agree with @Ron_C about too much drama.

It makes no sense. How will cheating on his current gf get back at his ex or brother? If his brither and father are cheaters with no scruples, then I think he might have a higher risk of being like them, but even so, it is not a definite.

I think they should focus on their relationship without worrying about all this other stuff that has happened in the past with other people. Is he loving, thoughtful, honest, supportive, that is what she shiuld worry about, not some fear that he might cheat for some irrational reason.

I’ll add that what I wonder is if this woman you work does this like that? Someone cheats on her so she goes out and cheats on someone else? Someone steals frim her and she steals from someone else? Many people I know who are suspicious of people like that are projecting.

Assuming he is being honest with her, I wouldn’t worry about that part, I’d be more concerned if there was a reason why she chose to cheat on him, was she just a bitch or was it in retaliation to something he had done to her…

@cheebdragon i think she just found his brother more appealing. He said he loved her, and I know it has hurt him a lot as he has lost a woman he loved and also his brother.

Then I doubt he would want to hurt someone else the same way. I wouldn’t worry about it, just make sure it’s not a rebound relationship and maybe be prepared for any trust issues they gave him.

@cheebdragon lots of people hate being hurt, but don’t hesitate to turn around and hurt others.