Would you rather love, or be loved?

To paraphrase Groucho Marx on the topic:

I could never be with a woman who had such low standards as to be attracted to me.

I think that Groucho said “I would never join a club that would have me as a member,” so you see where that came from.

All I can say is that it’s a good thing that I more or less enjoy my own cooking, because it looks like I’ll be eating a lot of that from now on. The woman that I do love and have loved for years seems not to care for me all that much beyond an arm’s length friendship, and she’s spoiled me for anyone else. I can’t get her out of my thoughts.

All in all, and although it sucks ‘now’, it was better to have loved and lost, as Tennyson said. And I’m not altogether without hope.

Ah… what was the question again?

”...what was the question again?

Was Groucho a fine philosopher?

The finest of all.

Why are there so many questions on here relating to sacrifice?
I want both, there, that was so simple.

Astroglide lacks emotions.

I too want both. To love and be loved is a wonderful thing. I’m too selfish for unrequited love and too caring to use someone who loves me but I feel nothing in return.

I either want both or neither.
Being loved by someone I don’t love would be annoying. Loving someone who doesn’t love me back would be lonely.

It should not be one sided. I want to love someone who loves me a lot.

’‘Love is always bestowed as a gift – freely, willingly and without expectation. We don’t love to be loved; we love to love.’’ Leo Buscaglia

What’s the point of loving if you aren’t loved back? And what good is being loved if you don’t love?

Yeah, both or neither. Preferably both.

Elephants love everybody. And who doesn’t love them back, except maybe the guy who has to walk behind them in a parade with a shovel?

I’ve had enough of loving; it would be nice to have it reciprocated at the same intensity for once.

That would be nice indeed @zenvelo; you pretty much took the words out of my mouth.

In the grand scheme of things I think you have both or neither with another.
If the other party is not reciprocating then I think you have infatuation/crush going on.

I enjoy being loved. I’m a little emotionally turned ‘off’ for loving too much, too much hurt in the past, although I still try.

I have a yearning to be loved. But I am full of love myself so I like loving.

Both are wonderful—I would go so far as to say “necessary.” I have tended to view myself more on the giving than the receiving side; but I’ve rethought that as I’ve aged. It’s a very selfish view, at worst; a very deflating view, in all cases.

When I love, I give it everything: my heart, my energy, my imagination, my permanence. It would be lovely to get that in equal measure, but the act of loving is a gift in itself.

I’ve been hurt by unrequited love (who hasn’t); and I’m certain that I have unwittingly hurt others.

I’ve experienced both, but I wouldn’t want one without the other. As the old song (Nature Boy) says, ”“The greatest thing you’ll ever learnIs just to love and be loved in return”.

Neither is much good without the other.

Both need to exist in a person’s life, or it would not really be love. We all want to be loved, but we need to dish it out on at least equal terms. In fact this is the central tenet of Theosophy and many other nonconventional religions/philosophies, to love others more than you love your self.

My last relationship i was adored, but I didn’t feel the same. Like others have said, I found it annoying and claustrophobic. Now, I love more than words can say, I’m not 100% sure if I’m loved back. I love loving him though. If I had to pick, I would rather love than be loved.

It’s very uncomfortable to be loved by someone you don’t love back. Makes you feel guilty. But loving someone who doesn’t feel the same about makes you feel belittled.
No doubt about it. I has to be both or nothing.

I love many things that never knew or cared or asked to be loved. A sunny day, may seem trite until 9 months of bitter dark cold.

The trees, they give me peace calm and strength respite and vision.

So on. So while not ideal I am comfortable loving someone who does not return the affection, knowing there is a balance somewhere.

Sure I think someone might love me or their percieved image of me. I think it can be annoying or guilty or inconvenient. But it is also flattering on a base level. Beyond that it can be comforting, sweet, or secure, sometimes creepy. But rarely is it boring. It is something. And that is the best part. Static is abrasive a void that needs to be filled I would much rather fill it with love then hate.. But since the myth goes that they are close cousins… eh..

Neither. Fuck it. I’m hardcore.

But I mean seriously, why not both? I was in love once, and that guy was in love with me. Lasted three years, but those were three awesome years. Unforgettable. We’re not together anymore, but I mean we’re still friends. That says a lot, doesn’t it? I think so, anyways. Love is best when it’s shared, least as far as I can tell. And as much of a pessimist as I am, I do not believe this to be a fairy tale, since I experienced it. Many have, and do.