How do you feel about dying?

I just don’t want to die young.

I’ve been in an ongoing visit to this topic lately, as a close friend is still recovering from breast cancer treatment, We’re all in our fifties, so the topic is not some distant worry, but looking at coming up in the next 20 or 30 years, if we’re lucky.

And collectively we’ve all noticed that looking death in the eye has taken the fear and a lot of the power of death off the table. It is something we all go through, no escaping, so the lesson is to live life as best and as robustly as possible.

It’s entirely normal to be afraid of dying—it’s part of living—but not to be fixated on it. All that does is rush the clock. Personally, I don’t think I’m afraid of dying so much as lingering with a terrible injury or fatal disease. Elephants live to ripe old ages, but I’m not interested in breaking any world records for longevity like this Japanese gentleman.

I think there was a short period in my 20’s when I had a phobia about death. I had been in a few auto accidents and I would quietly freak every time I approached a hill in my car. I was convinced that on the other side there was a vehicle speeding toward me in my lane. Then my life became busier, I saw some death first hand and the phobia dissipated. I’ve found a freedom in not fearing death. Life is richer without fear, more exciting, one less obstacle. It will come, no worries. I would prefer to die in my sleep after a long healthy life. That would be nice. Or a hero’s death would be OK. My family would like that. But I don’t think about it much anymore. Death, until my time comes, is something that happens to other people.

I’m not scared of dying. I look it in the face all the time. Yesterday I woke up in my apartment seeing white spots and about to faint, and I just thought “holy fuck if I pass out I will die alone here” and went about the business of saving myself with glucose. Just another day.

I’m scared of hospitals and prolonged illness, though. Straw death, the Norsemen used to call it.

Personally I quite welcome the idea of a peaceful death even right now. I feel it is so much better than life’s daily struggle and the pain(both physical and metaphorical) we are constantly exposed to. While not old yet, I think I’ve pretty much realized what it’s all about here on earth, there is nothing more to see or experience that leaves me interested or excited. So, speaking for myself(NOT my beloved), I would like to drift off out of here! Sorry if I sound cynical, but I think there is much more to be afraid of while living than when dead.

The only thing that scares me about dying is dying when my daughter is still young. That thought crossed my mind last summer when I had to go through many medical tests and some of the tests showed a high possibility of lung cancer. I was set up with an oncologist and was sent a huge packet from the cancer center. Thank goodness it wasn’t cancer, but it was staring me in the face for several weeks.

The other thing I worry about is being thrown in a nursing home. My mom is in one right now and my dad spends his days with her because he’s worried she’s not getting the proper care when he’s not there. Plus, there’s this strange man who lives there and he likes to wonder into the rooms of others, and there’s another woman there who steals things from the other rooms when the patients aren’t in there. I hate nursing homes.

When I go I hope it’s quick and my daughter is old enough to take care of herself.

Hmmmmm, I’m going to be completely honest: I don’t feel too hot about it lol.

Hopefully I’m not young and hopefully it doesn’t hurt.

I’m not really afraid of how I’m going to die or the act of dying.

What scares me is the thought of what may come after it.

Frankly, I could use the rest….

Annoyed, but what can you do?
I want written on my headstone, “Awww & I was having so much fun!”

Obviously I’d prefer not to die anytime soon but I don’t have any problems accepting my mortality.

I’ve had quite a few near death experiences and one that I was 90% certain I wasn’t going to make it through the night. Coming to grips with and accepting your fate is a very powerful life changing experience.

I’m fine with it. In fact, I am very much looking forward to getting some answers over on the other side!

Having grown up in the country and lost most of my family at a young age, it’s nothing new. All I hope for is that when the time comes, it’s relatively quick (meaning no hospitals nor “heroic” measures).

Sounds kind of counter-intuitive since the older you get the closer you are to dying. but the older I get, the less I fear death. I am not welcoming it, but I know it is inevitable.

Sometimes I see people in situations that I think I would not want to be in; thinking is this really being alive. The thought of being incapacitated and confined to a chair or bed is more frightening than the thought of death.

Dying doesn’t bother me. I am not looking forward to pain being the last thing I experience, though.

I’m not too keen on the idea at the moment but there will come a right time for it I suppose. It would be nice to go out eventually with little pain while holding someone’s hand but that is probably impractical.

My father died from emphysema. It was a slow death but he never complained. In a way he was fortunate as he was the first of his generation to go. Being the last one alive when all your contemporaries have gone would be very bleak.

“I know my time will come soon enough, but I will not dwell on it. What is the purpose? We might as well dwell on the work of our teeth or on the mechanics of our walk. It is there, it will always be there, and I don’t intend to spend my glorious hours looking over my shoulder to see death’s icy face.”
― Alberto Manguel, Stevenson Under the Palm Trees

I don’t fear death, I see it as a natural part of living. I am only 54 this year but have been at peace forever with the inevitable. I believe we should die when…
.A. we have collected enough life experiences, and B. when our reproductive lives are done.

The natural order of life is to evaporate within a reasonable amount of time after your organisms reproductive life is spent. I do not agree with all this bullshit of living to be 120. How in the world are the majority of people going to be able to afford to live past 100 let alone the gross parasitic taxation on our natural resources? The idea of immortality and extreme longevity is a manifestation of neurotic ego.

Unhealthy, unrealistic and just plain insane IMO.
We are in process of dying from the moment we are born. We go through a growth and expansion phase and then, much after 40ish we embark on the return movement. lol
I do not wish to suffer, obviously, and really hope that I am one that just doesn’t feel well for a few weeks, goes to the doctor and they say ” you have 6 weeks to live.”

6 weeks is all I need to make my final arrangements, re-home my pets and get my little duckies, err, goosies in a row. haha
Gazillions of humans have gone before us, it is what it is and I don’t lose any sleep over it, infact, I am all for euthanasia when quality of life on a mental/emotional and physical level is compromised.
My worst fear is dying suddenly and leaving my cats homeless, otherwise…bring it on whenever, I am humble enough to not think I should somehow be exempt from the inevitable. haha

I can’t seem to leave this topic. Here’s a quote that sums it up nicely for me:

“Here lies W. C. Fields. I would rather be living in Philadelphia.”

This was an epitaph Fields proposed for himself in a 1925 article in Vanity Fair. It refers to his long standing jokes about Philadelphia (his actual birthplace), and the grave being one place he might actually not prefer to be. This is often repeated as “On the whole, I’d rather be in Philadelphia.”, or “All in all, I’d rather be in Philadelphia” which he might have stated at other times. It has also sometimes been distorted into a final dig at Philadelphia: “Better here than in Philadelphia.”

Field’s actual tomb at Forest Lawn in Glendale, California simply reads “W. C. Fields 1880 – 1946”.

I would like to die, but I don’t want the pain.

@Headhurts kind of a scary statement there.

How do I feel? I feel it is unavoidable.
I’m scared of having a long term illness. I do not do well when sick. I have little patience or tolerance for it. My family would hate me. I get very cranky when ill. A quick heart attack or stoke would do fine. Even though it is painful, I hear it is at least quick.
But the idea of death does not scare me. I’m more afraid of wasting my life on useless things and ignorant people.

I would be some kind of liar if I said it didn’t scare me. Scares me, but I’ve long accepted that it’s gonna happen, or at least, I have accepted as much as I can given whatever experiences with death I may, or may not have had. I’m not looking forward to prolonged illness and pain and losing autonomy, don’t know who would. Dying probably sucks. As far as being dead though, well it’s probably a lot like before you were born haha.

When I was eighteen years old my hart stopped due to a viral infection because the doctor gave me the wrong medication. I was declared dead by the paramedics on arrival at the hospital. Than my brother refused to accept it and still continued CPR on me and pounded so hard on my chest that he bruised me and that got my hart going. According to the paramedics I was dead for six minutes. The moral of my story is Been there done that…
But how I feel about death is that there is nothing we can do about it, we as humans are very fragile and if your number is up nothing can change that. I cant say if there were a light or anything only in my case I ceased to exist. We are to scared to accept the fact that we will simply cease to exist, like pulling the plug from an appliance. There are so many myths what will happen after we die, but the only way you will get your answer is the day when you say “bye bye cruel world”

Why fear or fight the inevitable? Act as if every day is your last. Enjoy everything until your last day.

Over the last few years I’ve kind of lost my sense of adolescent immortality. People die every day, and I know it could just as easily be me.
I wouldn’t say I’m afraid to die. But I wouldn’t say that I’m ready for it either. I want to live a really long time. Die as an old woman. In a super vicious Viking battle.

I’ve told my kids, if I go sky-diving tomorrow and the parachute does not open, they are allowed to feel bad for maybe five or ten minutes and that’s all. Because on the way down I will be thinking:

“Man, everything looks great from up here…...Aww….well…..I’ve been one lucky bastard, and sure had a hell of a good time….....(not lucky today, however….nyuk, nyuk)”
.

During the most difficult parts of my life I was fairly comfortable with the idea of everything being over. Now that my life is really good, I am loving it and want it to continue for a long, long time. My attitudes towards death have changed, but I think I will always fear grievous injury/suffering a lot more than death.

AH yes, @AshLeigh

In the words of those iconic philosophers, Geddy Lee, Alex Lifeson and Neil Peart you have been “Learning that we’re only immortal for a limited time”.

I’m ready any time. I’m at peace and grateful for the terrific life I’ve had. 10 years ago, I looked back and realized I wouldn’t have missed a minute of it, but if that was all there was, it would be okay. I still feel that way. If there’s the time and money, I’d still like to go to Madagascar.

I’m not scared of dying. I don’t fancy dying in a painful way and leaving my family – that causes me to pause and think ‘what if’ a little but I can’t change that so no point worrying. Death no. Once it happens, well it’s all over red rover. I expected to die when I was 43. I’m still here. All good!

My kids are raised now, And to be truthful, I feel like i’m on borrowed time anyhow with the life I have lead. So actually, I’m not a bit afraid.

I don’t like it much. My disabled wife would be devastated to be alone and that would be my biggest problem with it.

This question reminds of this movie, Gummo. Life is wonderful. Without it, you’d be dead. lol

I must admit, I am 56 yr old and have had the same thoughts as I did when I was a young teenager. If and when I die, I feel that I have not done anything in my life that I could look back on and say, “hey, I deserved the time on this earth.” I know it sounds sad but I have always felt like that. Even though I have a wonderful husband and loving, dysfunctional, brothers and a sister, neices and nephews, I still feel that I have not done what I was put on this earth to do. I am almost just like a wind that has traveled and accomplished nothing to make myself worthy of this wonderful life.

I was rethinking my answer and I did remember something as a child that every now and then takes hold of me. Every Sunday as a kid was bath night and I remember thinking thoughts of doom. Why I don’t know. But I remember thinking about death and becoming so stressed about it that I would actually be shaking like I was having a seizure. It was so scary but I grew up in a time where no one spoke of death or politics or religion in my family so it really wasn’t a topic I could ask questions about. All I knew if someone died——they were gone. I can say now that I can’t remember the last time I had that feeling of dread and to be honest, I am very happy not to experience it again. It was paralizing. My advise to you is to look into your life and concentrate of the joyful times and let them be your focus. Write them down if you feel like you are experiencing anxiety about it. My friends who know me well ask me sometimes how I am feeling and my response to them is, “I feel like I am dead and dreaming I am alive, and this is only a dress rehearsal for the real life I will lead.” Be well.

For me, there are certain things that I have to do in life. And if they are not done, I’d rather die. So for me, in order for me to not end my life, I need to have the ‘tools’ existant that would lead me to my goals.

So death is no big deal unless I live being who I am. People should become who they are in life. And if they can not, the only point becomes ‘moments’. But for some, the burden of not being able to be who you are is too much.

Well..truly it is the small stuff that counts most. I may not die with a boatload of money and some amazing career accomplishments, but…I raised a child, have rescued and loved many animals, have had some unique life experiences, have never harmed anyone, lies to, or cheated on anybody. The best success is really liking who you are IMO, and I really like who I am, now, if I just had the cash I had 7 years ago it would all be perfect. lol