Animal behaviorists: could the street cat I am trying to adopt actually rape my 14-year-old spayed female Jilly-cat?

One thing for certain. He isn’t a stray. He’s too well fed and cared for to be a stray. Three months ago? Is your cat spayed? He may have smelled her when she was in heat.

She’s definitely spayed. For over 13 years. I am not so sure he isn’t a stray. No one has claimed him in spite of all the posters I put up. He is not neutered, which people in this neighborhood are almost certain to do. His coat is full of grit and his tail lumpy with dirt and matted stuff, not at all like a cat that has a lot of time in a clean indoors. He has no collar. He always seems ravenously hungry when he gets here. There may be a group in the neighborhood that feeds strays in colonies with a trap/spay/neuter program. If there is, I will ask if they know him. If they have, they sure haven’t trapped and neutered.

He looks some better now because he is letting me brush him some.

Your cat and the stray are both beautiful. I think it is just a playful, posturing behavior on his part. Plus, he wants to get laid.

Can you get a good look at the grit? Might it actually be flea dirt? If so, he’s got fleas and a lot of them. And if he has them, so do you because he hangs out in your yard and comes in your house. It’s something to know.

Flea dirt should dissolve in a bit of water and turn brown.

Sending this question to @syz, our resident animal behaviorist.

The cats are lovely.

Would neutering a middle-aged cat be akin to a similarly middle-aged man having his prostate removed? Life is different afterwards, but still quite enjoyable compared to the other possibility.

(Really pretty rugs, by the way),

Thank you @snowcherry. I will check. I had plenty of dirty fur but I threw it away.
Maybe I can stick one of Jilly’s flea preventer goops on his neck.

@flip86
If you don’t wish to participate in the discussion flip off.

@anartist Yes, beautiful rugs and kitties! Kudos to you for being so thoughtful as to trying to help the cats adjust.
I’d say that neutering would not cause him to run away, as long as you keep him confined for a few weeks as he recovers. It can take a few months for all the hormones to dissipate and for a male cat to settle down.

I think they have a really good chance of becoming compatible friends in your household. :-)

Based on your photos, it seems that Jill is accepting him pretty well. Sitting two feet apart from each other without freaking out is a good sign. :)

I’ve never owned cats so I have no sound advice about your original question; I guess it’s possible that Tom might try to rape her but cats are pretty good at looking after themselves and I doubt he’d be successful if Jill wasn’t willing.

An older cat can be neutered safely but it’s less likely to have an effect on his personality, if he’s aggressive or likes roaming for instance.
http://www.bluecross.org.uk/1957-95256/neutering-your-cat.html

No. The cat will not rape your girl. If you plan to keep him get him neutered.

Not if he is neutered as he should be.

Lovely photos of two beautiful cats. He looks way too healthy to be a stray though. I think he might be smitten. It’s sweet. I hope you can adopt him.

Also one thing about male cats you may not be aware of is that since he is older and if you get him fixed he may potentially still spray and in your house. :/ Many people think the smell of ammonia is because the cat isn’t using the litter box, well usually it’s quite the opposite, it’s a male cat marking his territory. Which it’s similar to urinating and sometimes you don’t know they are doing it, so when it dries up, breaks down and decays that it the smell we smell. So you might want to be prepared for that :/

Also, just another thing, being “fat” doesn’t mean “healthy”, he could have a belly full of worms. If you can capture him and decide to keep him he definitely needs vet care first, is be weary of letting him around your cat too much. He could have something. I regret I can’t see the pictures on my cell phone at the moment :((

so sad to see the question moderated like this. Even the trolling issue added to the liveliness.
Makes me think I should screengrab every on-the-edge conversation.

You may already be aware of this, but I’ll mention it because it happened to me.

Before you allow him any more contact with Jilly, he really needs to be tested for FIV/FELV. The second one is extremely contagious and it doesn’t take much.

It’s a quick in-office test so your Vet can get pretty accurate results within a few minutes.

Even if Jilly has been vaccinated for FELV, since she’s an indoor/outdoor cat, its not one of those which is 100% effective.

Hopefully all is well with him but since he’s a Tom who may have been in multiple fights, you really can’t take the chance.

I hope it all works out for you though. It appears that she likes him since they’re not fighting so maybe he can (PARTIALLY) fill Jackie’s place in her (and your) heart.

[Mod says…] @anartist, if you don’t want us to mod, you need to post in social then people can say whatever they want. However, all of those posts were off-topic or unhelpful.

@snowberry I looked at the dish he had eaten out of and found little black things in it. Could they be flea eggs? See dish here and here.

A website for people devoted to helping stray and feral cats posted a list of identifying traits.

Tom Tigger is most likely feral Will he even be adoptable? I realize he may never love me like my Jacky raised by me did, but could he love Jilly, his own kind? He seems to.

@anartist Flea eggs are much smaller than that. Suggest pm’ing @syz to see if she knows what they are.

How he stacks up on stray/feral charactistics here

it is a pdf based on the chart at the animal group site