Who wants to play the Creative Movie Title game?

Let me start with this:

Mr. Bacon Pants

Mr. Bacon Pants is the story of a TV cooking show host, who longs to become a crime detective novelist. Inadvertently, he becomes a real crime detective, whilst accidentally discovering/witnessing some interesting information about one of the producers of the TV show.

New Title: If Looks Could Kill

Dashingly handsome Travis Rose is one D.C’s elite CIA agents under a new operative entitled “Model Agents”. Criminals are no match for his chiseled good looks, but when a motorcycle accident permanently scars his face, will Travis still be able to take down the toughest bad guys?

The Barbers of Middletown

Dozens of men mysteriously disappear after visiting the consortium of barbers in a small town in Wales. Aliens from outer space are harvesting humen flesh to feed their overlord in preparation for world domination.

Schoolgirl Tentacles: The Love Story

Schoolgirl Tentacles: The Love Story

While are their female classmates are in passionate relationships with the boys from school, Annika and Chloe are incapable of feeling love at all.
Untill Dr. Janckowitz removes the girls’ tectals and stimulates the caudate tail area.
Brian and Chloe, and Aniika and Al, lived happily, in love, ever after.

Suicidal For Hire.

Suicide for hire
A brilliant biological engineer stumbles on the way to clone himself, with an accelerated maturity rate. He cobbles a small cache of clones, then he hires them out for suicide hits for money; once the clone eliminates the mark, the clone terminates himself (if he did not die in the attack). After his clone is caught on security camera assassinating an Arab oil sheik about to do a major deal profitable for the US, and another is spotted in Europe. The powers that be try to figure out if it is the twin of the first assassin and what target or major even is the assassin (unknown clone) going to hit; and can they prevent it.

(title) Too young for romance but old enough for life in prison.

A young altar boy gets molested by the Pope. Yet, in an act of injustice, the Vatican puts the blame on the boy and sends him to prison.
Will the boy survive his time in Hell? Will the Church and the Pope meet their rightful end?

Unholy Trinity – Hitler in Heaven

In this slapstick comedy, God is horrified to find that due to a bureaucratic mix-up, Adolf Hitler has been sent to Heaven by mistake. And because rules are rules, God can’t send the dictator back downstairs. Chaos ensues, with a little help from Satan, and it becomes a race against time; can God and his archangels restore peace before the tranquility of Heaven is lost for ever? Starring Jim Carrey as Hitler, Charlie Sheen as Satan and Ian McKellen as God.

Rotten Apples

Rotten Apples
The sorority of Alpha Phi Kappa is the hippest fraternity on campus; Sadie, Gloria and Morgan or glad to get in. After a wild wanton weekend on Spring Break Gloria and Morgan find they are pregnant. Not wanting to give up their careers and a summer of partying they steal away to have abortions. When word gets out in the small town the college and sorority house is in find out what happened and for what flippant reason it was done, the town boycotts the girls, dismay falls on the sorority which becomes a pariah to the school and neighboring community. Seen as rotten apples by the town, Morgan can’t take the heat and commits suicide by speeding her car into the lumber mills massive propane tank. Staring Miley Cyrus, and other Hollywood wannabees.

The commodity of sex: the society currency

All is well in the proud nation of Sextopia. Sex as a currency ensures prosperity and peace in this idyllic and wet society.
One day, invaders from the rivalling dystopia only known as Puritania depose The Grand Orgy, the Government of Sextopia.
Sextopia’s last Heroes and Paragons of Justice, Paul Phallus and Vera Vagina set out on their slippery path to release their Motherland from the Bondage of the Puritans.

The Return of Dr. Franken Superdracula

The Return of Dr. Franken Superdracula

The beautiful and epic love saga of high school student Hope Jezebel Fay McCullen and Dr. Franken Superdracula continues in this incredible masterpiece. After Dr. Franken Superdracula was brutally clubbed, stabbed and beaten to death by Hope’s possessive ex-boyfriend Kenny, he manages to resurrect himself after two weeks. Now he is longing for revenge and Hope’s love and blood, but Hope has moved on and is currently dating the broody and mysterious Dr. George, who is also Dr. Franken SuperDracula’s long lost twin brother. Will the unlikely couple ever end up together? And will Dr. Franken SuperDracula save the world from his foe, Dr. ZombieWizard Megawolf?

Fighting Fish

A sequel to Finding Nemo. I don’t remember the movie enough to do a decent job of finding a plot. If someone wants to continue this, fine. If not, skip to what you’d like to do.

An evil witch transforms Jean Claude van Damme into a Fish.
To regain his human form, the witch forces van Damme to enter into a fight to the death against Arielle, the mermaid. Only by eating the mermaid’s heart can our hero undo the curse.

The Rapist – a romantic Comedy

A therapist accidentally mistypes her job title on a government form, which causes a lot of confusion and embarrassment for her. She is required to travel to the capitol to make correction. She meets a young bureaucrat who takes up her cause. It turns out that the only way to fix the mistake is if she changes her name by getting married. She and the bureaucrat try to find her a quick groom, but they fall in love and she marries him instead.

Cheeses for Change

Dr. Frankenstein attempts to solve world hunger by creating a Muenster. Frankensteins Muenster alarms the town folk, and it is destroyed in a terrible fire.

The Waffle and the Pancake go to Jersey.

Two shapeshifting supercriminals, The Waffle and The Pancake, travel to Jersey for their ultimate heist. But their plans hit an unforeseen obstacle: The goddamned Batman. Why is he in Jersey? Because he is Batman.

Piccolo Daimao goes shopping for shoes.

Piccolo is on the hunt for the perfect pair of buttery soft leather Italian loafers. But, paranoid that he is about to be attacked at every turn, he doesn’t pay attention to where he’s going, slips on a banana peel, and the great slapstick Dragon Ball comedy is born.

Lord of the Rings: Gandalf does Dallas

While Gandalf is balls deep in reading his favourite spellbook in his arcane library, the evil Saruman speaks an incantation, pulling the soul of Sir Ian McKellen into the universe, fusing it with Gandalf. Consumed by his newfound desire for men, Gandalf puts a ring on his staff and begins a hot and steamy relationship with his young wizard apprentice, Dallas.
X-Rated

Redneck Rocketry – Apocalypse

Redneck Rocketry – Apocalypse
Jed and his friends from the Ozarks don’t like the way the nation is going. Jed’s nephew is a crack student at MIT, but deep in debt and also trying to impress Millie Sutherland; of the Hampton Sutherlands. Jed cobbles together cash from his buddies and Jed presents a proposal to his nephew Leonard; build a surface to surface GPS guided missile to blow up the White House, after some thought Leonard accepts; but he need help to do it. He dupes some of the brightest student into helping them saying they will be building a rocket capable of taking space freight to the space station. When the missile is armed and ready, hidden in a secret place deep in the hills, one of Jed’s buddies gets drunk and after a night of sex tells his girlfriend via pillow talk what their plan was. She calls the feds who arrest the whole gang, but not the students or Leonard, whom they do not know about. Leonard hears the news and tries to flea. He spies a cop training him, which was because his break light was out, but he thinks it is because the missile and guns his car. A high-speed chase ensues. Leonard loses control and plummets down a gully and is mortally wounded. When the trooper reaches him he is delirious and thinks he is speaking with his uncle. He tells the trooper the missile is dialed in on the White House and the launch sequence started. Before he can say where the missile is, he dies. Now the feds have to sour the hills, and then some, trying to find the missile before it launches on the White House
Lady pimp sells her children