I'm a Freshman in High School. What can I do to make friends easier?

Dude (or lady, I am sorry, we are not familiar enough to know your gender), please assume you are overestimating what will happen and lower your expectations. Do not assume that you are going to get a lot of feedback the first few days by being friendly. Everyone else is trying to make friends and nervous and not wanting to play their hands.

You seem to be talking the correct approach. Be friendly, day after day. People will realize you are sincerely friendly and want to be your friend.

Once you join the clubs you are interested in you will meet new friends. It is OK to feel nervous and new, and you won’t be the only one feeling that way. Give it time.

Be more sociable, talk to more people, smile to them always, and ready to give them a helping hand.

Maybe you can start with the hairy guy you sit at lunch? No I’m not kidding. He may look gross but he can be a really good friend, who know?

Be yourself and be real. Don’t try to purposely fit into a clique if it goes against who you are, don’t wear flashy name-brand clothes, just find people who are like you. Lunch can be hard, especially the overwhelming amount of people. At my high school, the lunch periods changed every day because we had the whole rotating schedule thing, and I’d always have trouble finding people to sit with. It’s hard not to get anxious in the cafeteria, but the less social you are, the less you’ll meet people. Joining clubs is a great idea, too, as mentioned above. A great, personal way to meet people.

I use to look for other students who seemed as lost as I felt then step up to them and let them know that you are new and would like some help in where to find a class or where to go to sign up for something. If they are truly not new they may help you out and be glad to help. If they are new they may either try to help or say they can’t help because they are not sure of things either. If they say they are not sure of things than you can suggest you both join forces and help each other out.

Of course the simplest way to find freshmen is remember who is in English 101 or any other primary freshmen courses. Remember faces of people you would like to know or ask them what time is their lunch period and if they would mind you joining them, let them know that you will understand if they are not comfortable about the idea. You can follow it up by saying that you were hoping to pick their brain during lunch to find out some more info about the school and they look like they would be the person to ask. Flattery usually works.

I would recommend talking to some of those people who are “half a million years older” or even the ones who have lots of facial hair. If you treat people superficially in this way, then you shouldn’t be surprised when you’re treated in the same way.

Maybe the high schools should have a badge that says… I am looking for friendships. Like the way wedding rings tell people that I’m taken look elsewhere.

Honestly, just don’t force it. Give it time and things will happen. Don’t try to control it

I guess you are new to the area. I think you will start making friends in a couple weeks. Right now everyone is excited to see the friends they hadn’t seen all summer, but that will wear off and people will start talking to new people. Maybe once you start getting assignments you can invite someone you think you would like to be friends with to study together.

You will start to get to know the people you sit next to in class. Plus, teachers will probably pair you up with partners some times.

It will all fall into place. The first week is the worst.

@CWOTUS I’m not trying to be like that, it’s just that seeing tons of upperclassmen and no freshmen makes it a bit intimidating when you want to eat lunch.

I actually know some people from middle school that got into my High School, but I have no classes with them. I feel so left out and nervous when I try to talk to someone because they generally don’t pay much attention to me and it’s aggravating.

I think at your age and in most high schools it will be easier for you as a freshman to talk to an upperclassman (depending on the person, of course) than it would be for them to initiate the conversation with you. Because of the age differential (which I totally get and remember), if one of them starts a conversation with you then it’s like royalty petitioning a commoner; it’s just not done. But for you to start a conversation – with due deference; you don’t want to butt in on someone else’s conversation, or break into someone’s study or reading or other attempt to be alone – and just be natural about it (without sucking up or begging for attention, that is) – it’s a conversation that that person “can have” without losing face with his peers by having started it.

I hope you understand what I mean there; “just start a conversation” with an older person and see what happens. It’s not at all that there’s anything “wrong” with you that no upperclassman can start that conversation, but it’s outside of the way things are often done in most high schools, and because of the way kids conform so much to expectations (even bad ones), it’s just not likely that an upperclassman will often start a conversation with you. So you can’t be too afraid to try it yourself. (And remember this conversation next year and three years from now.)

@BBawlight Breathe deeply. It might be helpful to remember that no human being on the planet received an owner’s manual entitled This is Your Life at birth. We all have to make it up as we go along.

There are many other freshmen in high schools all over the globe facing the same predicament. Actually, there are countless millions of people right now facing something new. They are encountering just what you are. That is fear.

When I am afraid, I feel it, acknowledge it, and move on.

Another thing I like to remember is that no one promised me an endless bed of rose petals for life. I have plenty of uncomfortable times, too. When I feel uncomfortable, I do exactly as I do when I’m afraid.

Being in a new environment is not easy, and I thank you for your candor in coming to us for suggestions. I hope you have an easier time of it, until it comes time to join clubs. That will certainly give you a group to hang around with, and it will hopefully help you feel better.

I wish you the best of luck.

Ok, making friends is really hard. I understand I don’t really have a best friend yet and I am going into 7th grade. Just be you people will notice if you just be yourself. Here is a tip to everyone trying to make friends. Tip: Don’t let your friends change who you really are inside. My ex Friend did that to me. I am a nice person (people say that I am not a person who thinks highly of myself) and what she did was make me a scary and mean person. I hope that doesn’t happen to you. I hope this helped a bit. :)