Men: Do you ever get nervous around women you like?

Sounds like a nice relationship you have already. As a female, I would say I get more giddy than nervous. I can understand how a man would be nervous though. I guess women hold the cards and the men have to be careful not to mess up. A lot rides on their behaviour, in the beginning.

I would give my first born in exchange for the elimination of the telephone. I loathe telephone communication and feel that it is much worse than no communication. Part of it has to do with the disruptive nature of it – you really don’t know what’s going on in someone’s life when you decide to send an alarm signal to their house so that you can communicate something with them. But most of it has to do with the inability to see the other person. Much of communication is about nonverbal cues.
Anyway, besides the fact that the telephone = hell for me, I recall when I was younger, I would do anything to avoid talking on the telephone with a girlfriend. I was in a long-distance relationship at one point, and during times we were apart, we communicated via letter (this is pre-computer).

I have always hated talking on the phone, and I only do it when I have something specific and important to say or ask that can’t be done by text message or email.

Since you both appear to hate using the phone, why bother at all? Stick to methods of communication that you’re comfortable with; whether that’s email or instant-messaging or texts or Facebook or whatever.

Talking on the phone is so 1990.

We communicate a lot through Skype and I feel nervous every time. She has commented on it and it is getting better but seeing my picture at the foot of the screen is off putting to me.

When I was younger I always got nervous early in a relationship unless I could see her to read her expressions and body language. I didn’t get nervous in person. Maybe not being able to see and feel her interest?

Ahhh thank you so much, guys!! Glad to know that I can always count on Fluther for some perspective and peace of mind! :)

He and I are so similar on so many levels that it neither surprises nor bothers me that he doesn’t like talking on the phone. I was just a bit concerned about the feeling nervous part, but I guess that is quite normal. I, too, feel really nervous whenever I pick up the phone to call him (or anyone else for that matter) and I’m always hoping that the other person won’t answer… And come to think of it, if that’s the biggest “issue” in our relationship, then I’ll consider myself lucky. :)

“Men: Do you ever get nervous around women you like?” Yes, as a guy I tend to be much more nervous around a girl I really like, more so than around any other girl. I’d be more worried if he wasn’t nervous around you. Guys don’t want to mess up around the person they really like, though I think this is true for women too.

I am only nervous around women I really like. Job interview levels.

@flutherother – put a post-it note on top of your picture.

My fiancé and I are both introverts, so we don’t like chit-chat and we don’t like the phone. We had a 90-mile distance between our homes when we were dating, and we mostly texted and emailed each other. Now we spend most of our time together quietly, and when we eat out, we hardly say anything more than, “How is it?” or “Want a bite?”. Neither of us feel uncomfortable with lulls in conversation.

I suspect that is the case with your beau, and your own dislike of phone conversation should help you relate to his perspective. It seems that he does not like, the phone, but he likes you, and doesn’t want to come across as a bore or a drag. Let him know that you don’t care much for the phone and consider communicating via texts and emails instead. Most introverts communicate best in writing.

I only get nervous around women who are crazy. I am at my best around women that I like.