How does someone get their confidence back?

Depends on why you lost it.

Through achievement.

Years ago I went to college, but never finished. When I finally returned to finish my degree a few years ago, I was terrified that I was not going to be able to follow through this time either. Gradually, as I continue to succeed, my confidence increases. (Although, to be honest, I still go through those times of fear of failure and lack of confidence, just not as frequently…)

Same thing as getting right back on a horse when you’ve fallen off…the quicker you return to something, the less time you have to freak yourself out about doing so. Failure is followed by almost immediate success, which helps cancel out the negative effects.

Problem is, I waited about twenty years to go back to school, lol!

The less you wring your hands about failure the sooner you will get your confidence back. Just focus on doing not necessarily succeeding. Doing, even failing gives you the tools to succeed ultimately, and with that comes confidence.

Through other people.

I try to surround myself with positive, supportive people and have weeded the negative ones out.
I take baby steps and celebrate every victory no matter how small it seems.
I read inspirational stories and quotes. I also reflect alot. I find someplace quiet and allow myself to just feel good about me.

A lot of mine has to come from within so how I talk to myself has a great impact. In my head I boast about how well I did something and tell myself how proud of me I am. I say “Psht, I can do this!” and if I can’t it’s not because I’m a failure. Sometimes it’s just because I don’t want to (and that’s okay with me!)

But I personally think the most important thing to do is clean your own house. Not in a literal sense, but really listen to what the people who you are closest to are saying and try to stay clear of the negative ones. My ex never came right out and slammed my confidence but he did pick away at it for many years before I realized it. The company you keep makes a huge difference on how you perseive not only yourself but everything in geneneral, imo.

There are still times when I have little to no confidence. When that happens I just have to pick myself up and keep moving forward.

It’s difficult at first but it does get easier : )

Confidence returns when shame is evicted.

People only put others down to make themselves feel better! The key is not caring what others think. I have never been a person that cared what others had to say. My friends are hard to be around sometimes honestly because they care way too much and its like because they have no confidence because they are putting themselves down. Everyone has their flaws but no one person is better then the next. Its all about the general rule, “If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say it at all!” I for one am all for a little more quiet in the world! :)