How would you best word a "No Internet" sign for your house?

Putting up a sign to remind “a grown-assed adult” to mind his manners is doomed to failure.

If you cannot find a way to sit down with him calmly in order to discuss something that is really troubling you (and rightly so), you do have serious issues with this relationship (and more than him simply being on his electron gadgets too much).

I’m not talking about my husband @gailcalled. I’m talking about guests who accept invitations to visit.

“FACE TIME ONLY”

:) I’ve never heard of that! Took me a minute to figure out what you meant! That’s pretty good @KNOWITALL.

It’s not an ICU… it’s a home.

As I tell my son, “Use your words.” Ask them if they need to step away from the table to handle their call, or something like that.

Signs are for impersonal situations and people who don’t like confrontation.

Not to mention, do you really want to be known as the no-phones-allowed lady? Think of the after-party Facebook posts

@Windmill My friend uses it all the time, can’t claim the credit- lol

Yeah, I don’t know that that’s a sign I’d post either, I’d just say “Hey did you come to see me or to play on your phone while drinking my wine?!” (Laughing) If they don’t get it, don’t invite them back.

Perhaps you can start training guests not to use their phones in your home in a fun way. Offer a little prize to each guest who manages to get through the evening without using his or her phone, a second place prize for one who uses it only once.

No. A sign is not the way to go.

Instead increase your hospitality. If you’re being the best you you can be, your guests will want to spend time socializing with you.

I actually was able to use my words with one guest regarding that @Seek_Kolinahr. The TV was on, people were talking and she was sitting right next to me. She answered her phone. After a minute I whispered “Could you take it into the kitchen? There are too many conversations going on in here!” She did, and actually said, “Oops! Sorry.”

Yes, straight up saying something in a nice way would be best. It’s hard, though, unless I’m dealing with one of my own kids. I’d be all, “GET OFF THE DAMN PHONE!!!” But otherwise, I’m not a blunt person. As @seek said, I’m a person who doesn’t like confrontation, and it’s hard for me to say something in a laughing manner when I’m actually annoyed as hell.

it’s hard for me to say something in a laughing manner when I’m actually annoyed as hell

That’s fine, as it’s dishonest to laugh away an issue. However, if you’re inviting people into your home to socialize, why are you also attempting to control them.

This control has been at the root of both of today’s questions.

It’s one thing if you think someone using a device while at your home is rude, it’s another altogether for you to desire a sign to tell them you don’t like it.

You’d be better off being upfront, instead of passive aggressive.

oh gods! She could end up featured on passiveaggressivenotes.com !

Anytime I write the words “passive aggressive” I think of Passive Aggressive Notes and this sign :)

@Pachyderm_In_The_Room: “Perhaps you can start training guests not to use their phones in your home in a fun way. Offer a little prize to each guest who manages to get through the evening without using his or her phone, a second place prize for one who uses it only once.”

I like this approach. Maybe you could get little “You’re a big kid now!” stickers that you can give out as prizes to the adults who act like adults. Or maybe you could send them all home because it’s past their f*cking bedtime anyway, those little shits.

I like those notes! I do!

I don’t kow @SpatzieLover. When you have company, don’t you have certain expectations of their behavior? Is that “control”?

Whenever someone gets on their phone, start your CD of a loud crying baby, and I mean LOUD, maybe they will get the point.

I manage to enjoy my company without the “no shirt, no shoes, no service” sign.

The only thing I ask my friends/family @Windmill, when I invite them over is to wear comfy clothes (no need to dress up on our account) and to come ready to eat. I’m an Italian mix. I make enough food to feed quadruple the number of guest I invite.

I would never ask my guests to leave their technology off or to curb it in my home. I’ve never felt the need to, either.

My husband is a tech geek with an IT job. If I have to speak to anyone about gadget use, it’s him I speak to well before the guests arrive. I kindly ask him to keep any demos or things of that nature to a specific time limit prior to or after dinner (or whatever we’re having folks over for). I inform him of the approximate time food will be on the table or ready for buffet style eating.

Since our invites never have time limits, if guests wanted to play games/apps/what-have-you way prior to dinner time, or way after, they just arrive ahead, or stay later.

Well, now I’m thinking, where did manners even originate from and why?
Would you be ok with your guests throwing food @SpatzieLover, or making references to, say, body functions over dinner?

Is everyone enjoying themselves? no one hurt? everyone fed? I’m cool.

Good Answer @Seek_Kolinahr, but, well. I guess I need to ask a separate question about manners and why they were even invented.

Get a “Please turn off all wireless devices” sign, like they have in the hospital.

Tech check.

“All tech devices, cell phones, laptops, Ipods, etc. WILL be checked in before entrance to these premises.”
” Failure to comply will result in your eviction.”

Everyone who visits our house (mostly family members) gathers around the computers and does very little actual visiting.

In the past, when I was a child, I remember everyone gathering around the piano and singing folk tunes. I can’t sing, and I hated those days, so I would sit in a corner and read a book.

When I visit people, I almost never look at my phone or think about looking at my phone. I would think it rude to constantly check it at someone’s house. I think it’s kind of rude and gross when people have their phones next to them on top of a table, unless it’s really casual, like a cookout.

My mom is forever threatening to put a basket for cell phones at the front door when we have family gatherings. lol She cannot stand people using their phones when they’re supposed to be visiting.

I realized the other day that I probably need a serious phone intervention. I drank too much Angry Orchard. I was drunk as hell, puking, and still texting. Oy! I need help.

@YARNLADY People gather around my desk top too because we’re sharing things with each other. We’re talking and laughing with each other. That can be comparable to gathering around a piano and singing. You are interacting with each other. That is called ‘visiting.”
I’m talking about people who completely shut out everyone and everything around them, ignoring everything but their phone, so they can play candy crush or whatever.

Please deposit all electronic devices in the fishbowl upon entering the premises. Unless someone dies, don’t even think of picking it up.

How’s that for direct and too the point?

I net to get a fish bowl!

A friend of mine was driving me effing crazy recently. I drove with her up into the Sierras here to scope out a campground for 4th of July weekend.
She had no cell reception at one point and..OMG!...her boyfriend had texted her and she just HAD to stop every 50 freaking feet to check for reception. Jesus…the guy can freaking WAIT 30 minutes for your response.

Lord deliver me from cell phone OCD people! lol

It’s crazy isn’t it @Coloma. Somebody goes to the bathroom, right, and their phone alerts and somebody goes and bangs on the bathroom door “YOU GOT A TEXT!!!” I’ve seen it happen, just like that.

@Windmill Yes, insane, I agree, and…my friend is 53! haha
Us boomers are just as bad, if not worse than a lot of the “kids” out there.

We should know better, too.

@Windmill Oh, I see. My niece and nephews used to text each other during family get togethers so they could have a private conversation with no adults involved.

We have one family member who carries her computer with her everywhere and sits in a corner and plays. She has an online farm complete with a family and everything she needs, with no actual live people involved.

To answer your question, I would say just find new friends or learn to live with it.

Why were manners ever even invented in the first place?

Why do manners come into this? Some of this is simply the time we live in.

When my mom is on call (which is pretty much always) she has to take the call. My husband always has to take emergency calls from work, and usually gets a couple per week. Most of my extended family members own their own businesses. We have doctor friends…....everyone I know has a career tied to their phone/technology in some way.

If at your home you’d prefer people use their phone in one private room when they come to visit, why not simply say that when greeting them at the door? “It’s so great to see you again. Oh you’re on call this weekend? If you get a call feel free to step into the (den, office, guest bedroom) for privacy during your call.”

I see open communication as the way to resolve any issue. If people know your boundaries, they’ll usually be much more accommodating to your wishes.

If you’re assuming your guests are ill-mannered then that’s what you’ll see. At some point they’ll pick up on a negative vibe from you, but they might not associate with your dislike of their phone use….unless you say something upfront.

@SpatzieLover: If I were on call (not that I would ever be, but hypothetically) and I were at someone’s house and had to take a call, I would say to the host “Sorry. I’m on call. I have to answer this.” Presumably she would then understand that it’s an exceptional situation, and it’s a bit different then checking the phone every two minutes for texts and constantly texting or chatting with friends “hey, how ya doin’?” type of conversations.

@SpatzieLover That’s a completely different situation. I’m talking about casual. Taking casual phone calls (or ANY phone call) in the middle of the throng, and yelling into the phone is rude to both the guests who are trying to talk to each other, and the person on the other end of the line. Manners has everything to do with it, and those manners need to be adapted to the time we live in. I guess I’m having a hard time understanding why you can’t see that.

Also, what @jca said. I mean, really, someone is texting and texting and occasionally pops up to inform the guests “OMG! My friend’s 15 year old daughter got kicked out of school AGAIN!” Back to texting.

Is it possible to simply turn off the internet? Maybe you could simply disconnect the modem or unplug the router.

@YARNLADY People aren’t disappearing into my computer room to use my computer, or using laptops. They’re using their phones. Can’t disconnect a cell signal.

Oh, I’m not very conversant with phones. I’m getting that way, though, because the littlest grandsons have started using grandad’s phone to play games. It kept them very quiet on our recent trip.

I just mentioned this to a computer savvy adult grandson, and he says turning it off in our house wouldn’t help anyway, because there a lot of neighbors who don’t have encrypted signals, and our computers would work off their networks.

If the WiFi is off it does make things more difficult, @YARNLADY. You were on the right track.

Clearly @Windmill I don’t know your friends or family. All I can say is that none of the people I invite over are spending time texting, calling or playing games while visiting with my family. Maybe instead of determining what type of sign you need for visitors, you need to evaluate whom you’re spending your time with.

Problem is, the majority of the time it’s family, our grown kids and grandkids. If it was MY kids I’d stop it, Mom style. But my kids don’t do that. So, finding other kids and grandkids to hang out with isn’t an option. :/

Can’t you just invite them, but suggest an activity beforehand? Specifically tell them, “I’d like to look at family photos tomorrow – do you want to come?”
If everyone gets out their phones after cooking/singing/playing together for two hours, you may not feel as bad. There are lots of awesome board games designed to just make people talk, too.

I think, as most people have said, I just need to suck it up and try to deal with it graciously as the opportunity arises, like that one time my husband’s daughter took a phone call in the middle of the throng and was talking loudly. When I gently suggested she take the phone to another room “because there are too many conversations going on at once in here,” that just came naturally. There was no edge to my voice, no implied accusations. I really couldn’t concentrate!

I tell you what I did do. My husband’s bosses boss came down from Dallas to take him and me out to dinner. I sent a mass text out to all family members, including the 2 that are the most guilty, that said, “We have company and are going to dinner. I do not want to turn the phone off for a couple of reasons, but please do not text or call unless it is urgent. This would be a very bad time to appear rude! Thanks.”

Sure, I could have turned the phone off, or waaay down (which I did) but I sent that text out with this question in mind, and also because there are a couple of fairly critical things going on at the moment so I didn’t want to be totally inaccessible.

@Windmill I like that idea. Although a lot of my friends are very respectful of my time, sometimes I get some text from a phone service provider which I just wanted to slap them. My bad for not turning down the ringing.

This might be what you are looking for It is a how-to on building a wifi jamming device. You could just turn it on, and their wifi dependent shit ain’t gonna work.

And this will jam their cell phones.

We be jammin’!