I feel depressed about my life. Is this common?

I think this issue is fairly common. I think our perception of normal has been altered by things like movies, which tell us our life should be fixed in 90 mins + montage in the middle act. I think Advertisers know they can make you spend money by making you feel a need you never had before they meddled. Problem is, you don’t spend the money, the new need remains unmet.

I too am a dreamer. I feel it is very difficult for me to communicate my thoughts and feelings to others, when inside my head it just seems so obvious. This was always very upsetting to me. I find it now easiest to communicate through humor but I find this a very shallow substitute.

I dunno, I hope my musings help.

I’m also a dreamer. But I can also enjoy things.

I have goals.. Things to work towards and hope you have some fun along the way.

It sounds like you want instant gratification… That will not happen.

Oh and don’t forget the depression medications commercials with the sad lonely woman in black and white, but with one pill that kills her sex drive, she can be smiling with friends in color.

Depression is very common and not something to be ignored. As a psychologist (now retired due to disability), I have always had special concern for those feeling depressed. Check my profile and contact me if you want my help. Out of respect for your privacy, I prefer not to discuss specifics of your situation where everyone can read it all.

Dr. Lawrence

How I deal with depression.

1. Walk or exercise at a fairly busy park.
2. No more night owling! (unless you are doing projects)
3. Stop obsessing about what your friends are doing, be you and do you even if it means cutting off social life
4. Eat well! Try eating fruits and veggies throughout the weekday, and only weekends do fried or crap foods. Think of it all as a game.
5. Set some goals when you write out goals everything becomes more reasonable. When you don’t write goals down they become fixated fantasies in your head that float around f-o-r-e-v-e-r

Don’t be a beast chained up!

About one in four people gets depression at some point in their lives. I did, for decades. It’s vitally important to inform your doctor, and also your therapist if you still have one. And all the points @pleiades mentioned are good, especially the ones about exercise and diet. And no, diet doesn’t mean half-starving yourself, it means eating a full 2000 calories a day of healthy food.

And, if there are areas of your life that you know are causing your depression, GET RID OF THEM. That includes so-called “friends” who make you feel bad all the time. If they are making you feel bad, they are not your friends.

Your struggle with desires is classic, a common part of the human condition.
Folks of any gender and all ages experience unfulfilled wants.
Some “deal” with it better than others.

One approach is to adjust your point-of-view so that you are satisfied with what is.
Zen, Vedanta, and many modern philosophies (including the one-liner “go with the flow”) recommend something along those lines.
Peace of mind is the goal. If your philosophy and circumstances produce that then you are successful in this realm.

A desire for control over life’s circumstances is innate. Depression is common among those who are intelligent and emotionally sensitive, and it is intensified by a felt need for conditional love. When one has a predisposition for anxiety, they seek means to diminish their angst. Following the irrational notion that this might be achieved by controlling oneself and/or others and creating a “perfect place” will only exacerbate the problem.

Reasons for how one becomes this way include a mix of a genetic predilection and the emotional environment of one’s family. Coupled with the limited perspective of youth, comparing oneself with the apparent talents and successes of others will inevitably add to feelings of diminished self-esteem.

I have worked hard all of my life to counter thoughts generated by my self-destructive emotions with increased understanding of what is real. Psychologists and psychiatrists have helped me in this pursuit. I wish you a long and happy life.

I suffer from what is considered a mild form of depression. I also regularly beat myself up for what I have not been able to accomplish. I consider myself an underachiever. Mild or otherwise, depression is by definition not a fun disease to live with.

One thing that I find helpful is to do things for others. I did some volunteer work helping people studying ESL (English as a second language). I have been doing online math tutoring. It is not volunteer work, but the wages are low enough that I consider it more a labor of love than a way of making money. I get inspiration from the students. They may be struggling with math, but they are nearly all highly motivated.

I get it a lot, too. I’m nothing special when it comes to physical appearance and physique, and I don’t wear clothes that everyone else around me wears, so I end up being an extra in society. But part of it is my fault because I don’t know how to deal with friendships and relationships. It isn’t something I am used to. And I can’t speak straight with anybody who I am not used to talking to, so first impressions are always soiled.
Do you have a lot of friends and a support system? Make sure that those entities aren’t lacking because I feel that that can add a lot to making you feel better about yourself.

Everyone has their ups and downs. The trick is to minimize the extremes.

It is normal to have the blues when looking at others success. It made me feel better to know that no ones plans actually worked out like they were supposed to. So we are all on equal footing and what you make of yourself is when you set realistic goals.. I am 36 and until I my 35th birthday I lived at home with my mom in a small one bedroom apartment. I asked the doctors for help and I am now living in a boarding house in a similar situation but I am in a fresh new environment.

You are only in your early twenties. Just wait, the real depression won’t hit for another twenty years.

I read something that might help:

When a person dies and no one cares the mourning is randomly assigned to another human being and that is why some days we just feel sad.

Just to clarify, I actually wear physical clothes, but I don’t follow the fashion trends, common styles, name-brands, etc. that everyone else wears.

So far, the OP has nt contacted me for assistance.