The very first intimate act in human history, how do you imagine that encounter was like?

Hmm. How do you suppose we got a first human couple, if not through sex?

Feels like the chicken and the egg. It makes my head hurt.

The very first intimate act was bacteria exchanging plasmids. I doubt they smoked cigarettes afterwards, the corner store wouldn’t open for 3 billion years.

Ever seen chimps fuck? It was just like that.

@ragingloli did that really require a link? I’m quite scared to follow it.

Odd, I put a nsfw tag in front of it. Yet i can not see it.

I don’t think you can speak of such an event. Where, exactly, in the constant and gradual evolution from Homo habilis circa 2.5 million years ago and the first homo species to pass the Y chromosome down to all human males today 338,000 years ago do you draw a distinct line and say this father and mother was not a modern human but their descendants all were? Do you exclude homo heidelbergensis of 600,000 years ago, the common ancestor of Neanderthals and Modern Humans?

Evolution does not proceed in sudden jumps. The creationists that talk about a Crockaduck fossil not being found are spouting nonsense. Evolution is a steady progression of continuous and small adaptations, and it’s still going on today.

@ragingloli oh I gathered it was nsfw. The question is we can all theoretically imagine it. What horror are you planting a primrose path for us to walk towards there?

@janbb The egg came first.

Some neanderthal covered in hair and dirt and Mastodon dung pushing some poor female over in the bushes and raping her. Oooh baby…kiss me again with your iguana breath.

Whatever/whoever, it was barbaric and I bet she wasn’t satisfied. Probably not even dinner involved…pfft….

Smelly!

I’m with @glacial How do you suppose we got a first human couple, if not through (previous) sex (between other human couples)?

I don’t think it was very “intimate.” Think monkeys.

But there is no such thing as a “first couple.” And they weren’t doing anything that their parents didn’t do. So there is no such thing as a “first time.’

@oneSasyRN I dunno, maybe Grog invited her to his cool cave for some Sabre tooth tiger steaks and a nice shell full of berry juice.

Quick, dirty, hairy and wet.

There wasn’t any such first intimate act unless you believe in the story of Adam and Eve. I imagine they were pleasantly surprised.

@flutherother

Adam: “Stand back! We don’t know how big this thing gets!”

@glacial The rooster came first or the egg wouldn’t have hatched. :-)

Eve: “Let me know when it starts getting bigger!....Wait, what? It’s done? Sry, man.”

A couple somewhere, somehow…did it for the first time ever. Maybe a few weeks after their reproductive organs fully evolved. And while others watch, clueless as to what was going on.

LOLL!!!

Probably a lot like fuckin’.

@ETpro Dinosaurs layed eggs.

@mazingerz88 “A couple somewhere, somehow…did it for the first time ever. Maybe a few weeks after their reproductive organs fully evolved.”

No! Just… no.

Don’t you know that human reproductive organs developed in just a matter of months, like, totally unexpectedly? No one knew what to do with them!

@glacial When I saw that I realized it was pointless trying to explain evolution to @mazingerz88.

@Dutchess_III Yeah, like before that, nothing reproduced. They all just dropped down form the sky-factory.

They grew up from the DUST @ETpro. Like corn.

@ETpro @mazingerz88 isn’t serious!

Wait! i thought teenagers invented sex. Just ask one. They’ll tell you. :-)

“You want to put what where…...!?!?!?!?!”

Well, the “first couple” had to have parents, therefore they weren’t the “first couple.”