What is it like living in a small community?

I lived in Denton, TX, which is about half an hour north of “The Metroplex” of Dallas/Ft. Worth. I think it’s about the same size as the towns you’re looking at.

The things I remember that stood out:

> Once you got off campus (it’s a college town) everything closed really early, like “9pm and can’t find an open restaurant” type early
> They had an awesome “downtown” square, things you imagine happening in small towns actually happened there. There was a store selling ice cream and an impressive historic courthouse. Those places and building have been built up around in larger cities so it’s cool to see them in a more natural setting.
> Jobs in “the big city” (DFW) seemed to pay better, so many people drove.
> Rent was cheap, like half of what I was used to in Austin, other costs seemed the same so I don’t know if you’ll find huge cost of living savings other than rent
> getting around the city was easy and liberating after so many years avoiding 7–9am and 4–6pm. You can get everything done without having to plan what traffic will be like at a certain time.
> 100,000 people seemed big enough to have just about every type of store and entertainment that you use on a regular basis
> 100,000 is small enough that our favorite authentic style Greek restaurant had to serve french fries because people expected all restaurants to serve french fries…
> I’m not sure how to convey this very well, but there was a certain “you’re not from around here, are ya?” that went into a lot of interactions. Sometimes just when dealing with a business in a polite “let me explain how this is going to go” way and sometimes a lot less friendly. I had more random awkwardly confrontational moments in gas stations and public spaces there than I remember having even in “bad” neighborhoods.

Pardon my French but everyone knows everyone’s business, you fart and it’s recorded in the local logbook.

Everyone is closely related.

To me, Charleston isn’t a “small town.” I live in Lexington, SC, about 20 minutes from Columbia (the capital), and that’s a pretty small town – population of 20K. However, there are much smaller towns. Even with only 20K people, that “everybody knows everybody’s business” doesn’t really ring true. There are towns just outside of Lexington (like Gaston, Pelion, and Swansea) where it’s absolutely true, but the population of those towns is more like 1,000. Now that’s a small down. Charleston has some culture and a decent nightlife. There’s plenty to do there, moreso than Lexington. We need to go to Columbia for any decent nightlife. If you live in Swansea, you’ve got fishin’ and muddin’ and not much else. I don’t know how those people live, but I’m sure people would think that about me as well. I think Charleston would be a good transition for you, but it’s no small town. Oh, and I hope you don’t mind miserably humid summers and giant flying cockroaches, because Charleston and Savannah have both. ;)

It’s a little bit like Fluther. A few can expect to be sliced and diced on a daily basis. Others get a free ride. But everyone knows- or thinks they know everyone else’s business, and aren’t afraid to “tell it like it is”.

Size isn’t the only factor in finding the traits of a community. If the town is isolated by large unpopulated areas, such as desert, or large ranches, or an island surrounde by water, then there is a lot of gossip, extra conveniences are hard to find, jobs are few. I moved a couple of years ago. I’m not in any condition to relocate again, so I chose according to my small town desires and metropolitan needs. There are lots of well populated cities which are surrounded by small rural “villages”. Here you can find a nice, quiet home, even with the acres to plant a well populated garden, have some pets, etc. You could have a gazebo with an art easel set up, a pottery workshop. When you need to do some extensive shopping, find a specialist for a new medical condition, you will have the city nearby to find what you need. One thing I did not realize before moving to MY new community, on thanksgiving and Christmas, NO restaurants are open. If my health does not hold up for me to cook on those days, I’m stuck with whatever sandwiches I can throw together. Know your community before you go. I live right in the city, but Its a very old community, surrounded by those small villages. My city is heavily sprinkled with parks, and small undeveloped areas. They are kind of little rest stops in a big, busy place.
I don’t think you have to go very far to find quiet little places. I seved in the Navy in Annapolis. When my then husband and I were looking for a place to live, we found lots of little communities, convenient to Baltimore, DC, and Annapolis. Brooklyn,Md is just outside of Balto, I believe across a bridge from the city proper. Edgewater was okay. There was another, right along Ritchie highway, just north of Annapolis. If you want something more rustic, Virginia has some fabulous little communities.
If you want to break completely to a new attitude/environment, you could check out Memphis TN, or Des Moines IA. Both have several attractions and amenities, but are surrounded by sprawling farmland and small towns.
Where I live has a fabulous zoo, museums, boating attractions, well supplied farmer’s markets (In season), parks, water preserves, many other attractions. Jobs are plentiful. There is a plentiful collection of small towns all about. Income levels vary from billionaire to walking dead.
People who live in small towns and can’t wait to get away live in those very secluded places.
Good luck Be sure to enjoy the hunt.

I live in a small town in Missouri, where everyone and their families went to school (one school of course) and senior pics on the wall, everyone knows you and your business, your kids can still ride bikes and play in the streets, we still have neighborhood watch and nosy neighbors, and everybody except us Heathens goes to church on Sunday and Wednesday, and school ballgames every Friday night.

I like it, I like knowing people and saying hello and knowing this kid that came from a biker family is now a cop, and so is his brother. It’s a very connected community and we help each other a lot.

@funkdaddy Rent is one of the biggest expenses here, and that’s the area that will make the biggest difference to me. The most I can comfortably afford to spend on rent is about $600 + utilities. Around here, that’s enough to rent with roommates in an outlying suburb. I’m hoping to either share with roommates for less money, or get my own apartment. LOL about the french fries.

@livelaughlove21 I’ve been to Columbia. There were plenty of cool shops and restaurants, and the whole place had a lot of character.

DC was a swamp before the city was built, so miserably humid summers are a part of life here. :) As long as there’s a public pool or somewhere to swim, I’m happy. It would be great to live somewhere with public beaches, and milder winters.

@Jonesn4burgers Those are good things to think about- thanks! I love Annapolis, especially. It’s so cute and quaint. But I’d really like to live somewhere warmer.

@Haleth Yeah, Columbia is alright. It doesn’t take long to become boring though.

You’ll definitely find mild winters in SC. It’s 80 degrees in Columbia today. Hating it.

Have you considered Frederick, Maryland @Haleth? I’m from DC and ended up moving to Frederick in my 20s. I really came to love it. It’s got a lot of DC-type stuff to do downtown, with a thriving arts and music community and live music just about every night. But it also has a very suburban feel radiating out from there, and if you go a bit farther north or west, it’s rural. There are mountains and forests and state and national parks, too. As an added bonus, you can be back in DC for a visit in about an hour!

@augustlan Fredrick is awesome. It’s got exactly the kind of “feel” I’m looking for, where it’s a midsize community with a lot of character and culture. I really want to live somewhere like that, but warmer and on the water.

A town that has 100,000 people is considered a city to us small town people. The largest town in the county I live in has 20,000 people (not including the university population). The town we live in has a population of 350.

Some things you should know about living in small towns:

1. Everyone won’t know everything unless you live in a town with less than 15,000 people.

2. Prepare to travel is you want decent health care.

3. Do your research if you are concerned about the quality of education for your children. Some small towns are supported by their community and they can provide an excellent education for your children. Some small towns don’t have the money. We were lucky to find a community with many resources to support the children from the community.

4. You’ll love the slow pace if that’s what you are truly looking for.