Will Fluther be a kinder, gentler, more civil place in 2014?

Probably not.

Why would the leopard change its spots?

Doubt it.

There’s a pretty good chance of it, if certain people move on to other places where they will be better appreciated.

We can always hope.

All we can do is hope.
John Fitzgerald Kennedy – Every area of trouble gives out a ray of hope; and the one unchangeable certainty is that nothing is certain or unchangeable.

@Hypocrisy_Central My Magic Eight Ball says, “Go Fµ¢# Yourself.” So maybe not.

My magic 8 ball says, there’s sake in me, break me open and DRINK MEEEEEEEEE.

My guess is it will be pretty much what it’s always been. Ain’t no shiny n00 year gonna change that shit.

Naw. They’re not that into it.

It will be if each and every one of us makes it so.

I think what you see on Fluther is about as good as it gets on the internet. The frictions here are just what happens when you allow divers people to express themselves in an anonymous environment. So unless something happens to change human nature, this is what it looks like.

The modding helps a little. We weed out those who just want to stir up trouble, we break up the worst of the fights and we mop up the pages afterwards, but there’s a limit to how far we can carry that. Conflict is normal—healthy even—so if Fluther is to be an honest representation of our community then room has to be made for some rough and tumble. At what point is it “out of hand” and toxic? When feelings are hurt? When someone takes offense? That would mean that a flag on a comment would be automatic grounds for removal. The most sensitive people would end up being the arbiters of content. But at some point, we have to declare that things have gone too far and step in. Until someone comes up with an algorithm for identifying exactly where that point lies, then we’ll just have to defer to the judgment of level-headed human beings (understanding that not everyone will be happy with the outcome).

The General and Social sections have some role to play in this, too. If you post a Q in General, it should be with the understanding that you’re limiting the range of responses you’ll get. That’s a choice. In return, you get answers that bear directly on the question, and won’t stray into peripheral matters. That’s not a recipe for fun, admittedly, but it’s a good way to get useful information. If you post in Social, then it should be with the understanding that even comments that you personally find outlandish or offensive may get to stay. With that kind of freedom, both fun and bruising are possible. Welcome to the human race.

^^^ If that don’t get the “what an elegant rejoinder” reward, I’ll have to rethink all my verities.

@thornimud; You can scold and chastise me any time you want, and as severely as you want.(Please.)

When everyone is liberal & atheist peace will rule the world haha (sarcasm)

HC you missed the CliffNotes, torment and turmoil with lots of laughs.

wishing thinking is getting me nowhere. scratch my previous anwer.

No

I’ve been on quite a few Q & A sites, and despite some hot topics and people getting overly emotional about the ones which are important to them, this is still one of the better sites out there.

I realize that the fluther userbase is mostly nontheistic and progressive, but try reversing the scenerios a bit. Try being a lone progressive on a conservative site, or a lone nontheist on a religious site and see how it pans out. I had done both (though I’m not an atheist), and I had to eliminate my accounts on most of those sites. The censorship on some of these sites was very ridiculous. I would post informative comments not attacking others, only to be down voted out of existence or be flamed, but yet the flamers comments were left unmoderated.

This is the only Q & A site that I really post on. There are about three other blogging sites that I post on from time to time, and one of them is private where we only discuss certain topics. I’m not sure how 2013 ended on fluther since I havn’t been online that much in the last few months due to personal and financial problems, but there will be arguments and disagreements where views are openly discussed on a public site such as this.

Most general community sites like this one, people are pretty terrible to each other. Fluther is much the same, though because it is much smaller than the other sites I’m familiar with I don’t think it gets quite so bad here. But they all tend to think they are the best. I don’t know why we can’t show more compassion and empathy towards one another.

@hug_of_war To put it very simply, to show compassion or empathy to someone here means you might be softening toward their belief system or whatever it is that they believe that you don’t.

I don’t believe I have to soften my beliefs to treat others as equals, who deserve respect.

@hug_of_war I think maybe that’s what snowberry perceives from non-theist attacks on theists.

@KNOWITALL. I suspect that’s the case with a lot more than just atheist vs. theist.

Some folks have no idea what compassion or empathy is. Not here, not if it means being decent to someone you don’t agree with. Some folks feel just too vulnerable, too wounded, or are too immature to do the right thing.

I don’t need Fluther to be kinder, gentler or anything, because, the truth is, it already is! Fluther’s still better than Yahoo!Answer in the very least

My only complaint is that I don’t seem to understand the mods’ mind though.

@Mimishu1995 Anytime you have a question for the mods, they will answer. Just click on the contact tab above.

I hope so! I think the only problem with fluther is the tiny community it has become. Sometimes answering tons of questions for no reason at all, day after day, can make one a little grumpy. I love fluther and its format. I could do without the drama tho’. I still post questions here because I trust this communities ability to give great answers.

Just wondering, has the kindness and gentleness for this year started yet?

update

I can answer my own question now; we are a quarter way through 2014 and the kindness and gentleness has yet to take hold in any real and meaningful way….pity.

^ What do you mean “pity”?

^ It is a pity this place can’t live up to what it touts itself to be, the best of the Q&A sites that doesn’t have the flaming, infighting, insulting of others such as the now defunct Askville, YA, AB, etc. There is that here, maybe not as much, I have not been on those sites in years, but this is far from a “safe harbor”.

^ So it seems. But I think Fluther does succeed in that goal in some way :)

^ I think it could do better, don’t you? If anyone touts themselves as being the best or better of etc. should they not do more than “enough” to keep that a reality?

^ Well in that case let’s just be optimistic in the future :)

I like Fluther the way it is – honest and ruthless. Who gives a shit about being polite? Sorry, but people aren’t going to get away with saying stupid shit here.

@livelaughlove21 That’s how joking differs from trolling.

@livelaughlove21 Sorry, but people aren’t going to get away with saying stupid shit here.
And who gets to be the “stupid saying czar”, you or someone you will nominate, and by whose authority do they get to determine what is stupit and what is not?

@Hypocrisy_Central There is no determining party. If I see stupid shit being said, I may comment on it. If I say something another member finds stupid, he or she may squash me for it. No one is safe from having their BS challenged on Fluther. If you want to be able to spout off inane crap without being criticized or challenged, the Internet just isn’t a place for you. Hell, the world may not be a place for you. If you can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen.

^ If you can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen.
Surely you can’t be directing that at me, of all places, this place; I have to have 4 flame retardant suits and three more as backup every time I log into this place. 8-P

If there’s anyone here who can stand the heat, it’s Hypo lol.