Am I just imagining this or do most jellies hide their gender?

[Mod says] Moved to Meta.

I wouldn’t say that they “hide” their sex or gender or sexual preference or ethnicity or nationality, etc. I find that most will disclose that information – if and when it’s relevant to the discussion. There are several Jellies that I am unsure of how they identify or where they’re from – but that doesn’t mean they’re making efforts to hide it; perhaps they’ve mentioned it in a thread I didn’t see, or one I have forgotten about.

I’m near 50, so I’m no longer a ‘youth of today’, but I prefer to avoid being stereotyped when possible, because I do not fit neatly into the middle of the bell curve of what an American female is supposed to be like. I don’t have a problem with being an American female; I have a problem with people judging me as such before they have an opportunity to know my mind and character.

I think that people who do happen to match the societal expectations of their gender are comfortable with those stereotypes. While that may be the majority of society – there is still a sizable proportion of people who do not ‘fit in’, and also those who might fit in, but recognize the limitations it places on those who do not, and thus eschew the system.

Because my mummy said I am not allowed to tell anyone.
STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER!

Are you talking about Fluther community?

If so, then it’s most likely part of the “hiding-personal-information-from-the-net” policy.

Fluther, friendly as it is, is a website like many others. And giving out information on the net isn’t preferable. Those with enough common sense don’t feel like giving information on the net, and gender is part of the information.

When I first joined, I intended to hide my true gender too. It was some jellies here that discovered it * sigh *

@hearkat A little off-topic, but how did some jellies here find out about my true gender in the first place?

I’m a girl.

@Mimishu1995

”...how did some jellies here find out about my true gender in the first place?”

I don’t remember seeing anything you’ve written that explicitly reveals your gender, I just have a general impression from reading some of your posts of what your gender is.

@Brian1946 And which gender do you think I am now? :)

@Mimishu1995

I think you’re now the same gender that you were when you joined Flooder. ;-o

@Brian1946 This is when my gender got revealed for the first time. I was shocked that they managed to find out even though I never revealed it before that.

It’s just another part of personal information. Gender alone isn’t much to be concerned over, but in conjunction with other information, it can add up.

When I first joined Fluther, I did a really good job of staying anonymous. Now that I’m a moderator, who has to stay in contact with other people, I’ve lost a lot of my original anonymity.

@Mimishu1995 – I can’t speak for how anyone has“discovered” your sex – I don’t see where it was “revealed” in the post you linked. Based on what you have written and your avatar, I have the impression that you are female; but I don’t recall you ever confirming or denying it, so I can not say that I “know” it with any certainty.

I think that we draw conclusions based on what people say – we might even “hear” in our imaginations what each others’ voices sound like – from these things we make assumptions, and sometimes we are correct. I have been mistaken numerous times, which is why I prefer to use the ‘they/them’ pronouns as gender-neutral.

You’re just imagining it.

I have yet to be surprised by a switch hitter here.

It has not been my experience that most jellies try to hide their gender.

Even where a jelly doesn’t expressly reveal their sex, it’s normally fairly easy to ascertain through their posts, not just personality revealed.

I think it would be rare to find a user on Fluther who intentionally keeps their sex or gender a secret. Not every user will have a picture of themselves as an avatar, use their given name as their username, or post a description of themselves on their profile that says “I’m male”, “I’m female”, etc. That doesn’t necessarily mean that they are hiding anything, though.

The Internet affords me a clean slate: I don’t have to be the gender that I was Assigned At Birth. I can be the gender neutral person that I perceive myself to be. I am not “hiding” my gender; I just don’t have one.

^^^^^^” I am not “hiding” my gender; I just don’t have one.”
I always thought men, women and animals’ genders involved the appearance of their genitals. You mean you have no genitals? No; you don’t have to answer that question but it’s the only way I can imagine not having a gender. It seems it would be very complicated from birth onward. For instance, when you were born and people asked your mother “boy or girl?” would they answer, “neither?” I can picture jaws dropping.

@Aster You’re thinking of biological sex, not gender. Genitalia does not dictate gender in any fashion. There are lots of references to be found online regarding different forms of gender identity and expression.

For the public records, I do, in fact, have genitalia. I have chosen to actively conceal my biological sex from Fluther for personal reasons, and appreciate that users have respected (or, at the very least, humoured) my decision since I first joined the site.

I am glad that society is changing to accept the differences in gender identity. I am a heterosexual female with a very obviously female shape. However, my brain and personality are not what society considers “feminine”.

I applaud that people like @muppetish have made this distinction in the world so that even Facebook offers more than 50 options for one to choose as their gender. Currently, the changes are mostly happening online, but hopefully they will carry over to greater society sooner than later.

I’m not sure people hide it. They just don’t say it outright for no reason. After hanging around here for a while, I’ve come to learn most of people’s genders, it usually pops up on some thread or another. But there isn’t some gender hiding movement going on here, least none that I’m aware of.

@Mimishu1995

Here is where you reveal your gender! ;-o

I don’t think anyone does so on purpose. I think they may not realize that their avatar can be misleading.

Spend more time looking at NSFW posts, gender becomes pretty obvious

@hearkat If you spend a little time browsing my account and my past responses and questions, you’ll see I never established my gender before posting this. My avatar was different back then. It was because jellies here discovered it that I decided to allow it to be fully revealed.

And by the way, I had the impression you were a man when I first saw you :D

@Symbeline then I’m among the one who deliberately hide my gender.

I hide mine extremely well. Yeah right. Although I do get a lot of jellies that think I’m female. What’s with that?

@Mimishu1995 I had yours pegged after a few comments.

@Adirondackwannabe I can tell you’re A MAN :D

@Mimishu1995 I thought you were a teenage boy until this TJBM. You responded to a statement about never getting prostate cancer with “Absolutely, because I’m a girl.” Changed my whole imagined vision of you. I actually really like when you get all feisty now because I think you’re a cute tiny Asian. If you aren’t please don’t spoil it for me.

I don’t think I hide too many things. I don’t really care who knows all about me, given that my first question posted was that I’m a sleepwalker with a gun. Come on over, I dare ya.

@Mimishu1995 Thanks. The previous poster scares me though.

@Adirondackwannabe What I like about you and @GloPro is there is no guess work involved! ;)

@Cruiser I like mysteries but not in real life crap. I shot from the hip.

Pffft. I couldn’t be mysterious if I tried. And I know, I’ve tried.

@GloPro your avatar is edging towards mysterious

I was thinking her avatar is edging towards psycho.

@GloPro I thought you were a teenage boy until this TJBM. You responded to a statement about never getting prostate cancer with “Absolutely, because I’m a girl.” Changed my whole imagined vision of you.
So my hiding-my-true-gender policy has succeeded in some ways :)

But seriously, I like more boyish things than girly things. Just browse some of my question and decide for yourself.

I actually really like when you get all feisty now because I think you’re a cute tiny Asian
When I first came here I tried to avoid argument because I didn’t want to get more flame and attacks like on Yahoo! Answer. I mainly asked for pure information. And when I figured out that Fluther is pretty open-minded, I decided to show my true self haha! And by the way how did you know I’m an Asian?

…given that my first question posted was that I’m a sleepwalker with a gun.
Now that I think back, I remember seeing a question about sleepwalker and guns one day here. I wasn’t interested because I had no good answer for it. So it was you huh?

@Mimishu1995 Yep, that was my first day here. The answers were all awesome. People don’t mind answering questions around here. It’s been fun learning people’s personalities and imagining their physical characteristics.

How did I know you were Asian? Ah, I paid attention somewhere, I think the day with the 13 year-old with horrible spelling and punctuation. You attempted to make her feel better by explaining that English is your second language and mentioned where you are (I remember, but will leave it off here). Your posts crack me up… Still none more than the “piss on you shit fuck grave” comment, which I have never heard anyone actually say… Other than you, you teeny tiny anime doll, you :-)

@GloPro I almost forgot that you were there too :) Anyway, that was a cool little experience right?

I just tried to be nice to her. 13-year old girls already know everything, so the approach you take is acceptance, praise and then guidance. Otherwise it’s big walls and closed ears.
Besides, she was trolling (intentionally or because she has no clue how to actually debate), and some people were reacting to the trolling by attacking back. No need for all of that. I will disagree forcefully, and stick to my guns, but I acknowledge good points and try not to ever name call or personally attack. Lead by example.

My avatar is sometimes female, sometimes male, it’s more fun that way. I have never pretended to be anything other than female if I mention my gender when responding.

I think it’s funny that anyone thinks their identity is safe online just because they don’t disclose their gender. I’ve never considered trying to hide my gender on here. I feel like it would be some huge lie that I’d have to be careful about all the time. I always post things that make it quite clear I’m female, so I can’t imagine having to censor myself so no one finds out I’m a woman. Things like saying “my partner” instead of “my husband” would be a hassle to me.

I don’t have a prostate – just like all the women here.

@Mimishu1995 I always thought you were a girl. “Mimishu” sounds feminine although I have NO idea what it means. I also assume you’re youngish…perhaps because of the 1995 on the end.

@Adagio Oh shit! You’re a girl? I just hate it when that happens!

@ragingloli

If you read people’s posts, you’ll figure it out. I mean there are only two options anyway. And five if you count preferences.

I thought for a long time that @ragingloli was one the most interesting females on the net. Totally unique, total kink, totally safe because she’s on the other side of the screen. Then he let it slip that he was a guy. He’s still interesting, but not so much. Interesting how that can change things. But then again with the loli, you can never tell.

I always thought @ragingloli was a guy, but then I was told that she’s a girl. So what up?

@ragingloli has to be a guy. There’s no way he’s not.

This would be a good opportunity to start taking bets.

Ragingloli isn’t even human, you guys. It doesn’t count.

Many here are transparent; some are careful with occasional slip; a small group are always vigilant.

@Aster; Does “Female Woman” make a point that is different from being either “female” or “woman? Does “Forever” mean that there is no surgery for you in the future?

Or are you trying to place yourself very precisely on the gender spectrum?

Here is how to customize your gender on Facebook as @hearkat mentioned. https://www.facebook.com/help/276177272409629

Loli. Loli? Raging Loli?

@Dutchess_III Loli.

Had to use my phone to post that link. No way in hell I’d look that up from my work computer.

I’m not sure why most people try to hide their gender, unless they’re looking for an equality that is not always found in RL. Maybe a male/ female will give an answer more consideration if he thought it was from another male/ female or androgynous person?

I only hid my gender once, placed my pecker betwixed my legs & stood gazing upon my “lady garden” in a full length mirror.

@ucme “It puts the lotion on it’s skin!!!!”

Do you remember that movie, Silence of the Lambs, his name was Buffalo Bill. I felt sorry for him by the end.

@KNOWITALL Haha started thinking about that movie as well. XD

@KNOWITALL That was the exact scene I was thinking of when I wrote that, you’re a genius woman, a bleedin genius :)

It’s an “interesting” view from the rear, looks like a snake emerging from a fruitbowl

@ucme This reminds me of a part in this book, Trainspotting. The guy injects heroin and uses his penis as an outlet, and it says something like; ’‘it looked like an experiment being performed on an ugly sea snake.’’
I don’t know what’s funnier, that part, or its suggestion that some sea snakes are prettier than others. Especially when none of that had anything to do with actual sea snakes. yeah just being random now

@ucme You’re so funny….crackin me up. 3:03 pal

http://youtu.be/XTs_TZFjbJ8

@Symbeline Being random is good, embrace it & never let it go
@KNOWITALL You said that you felt sorry for him in the end, like moths do we?

Lol I misspelled random. Fixed yo.

@ucme Nah, I have some LGBT friends and not everyone is ready to have the surgery, or can afford it, so I just kind of wanted to help the guy so he didn’t have to kill. From what I’ve seen and heard, being transgender is not easy, and people aren’t always kind, just pulls my heartstrings.

Ahh, you’re all heart.
Speaking of random, at the end of Silence of the Lambs, when Hannibal follows Dr.Chilton, I focus on how long I can see him until he’s lost in the distance. Pretty bloody difficult considering the closing credits get in the way.

@ucme Yeah well, reality bites for a lot of people.

I totally get that and I love Lector, too, would almost make you happy to have your brain ‘eaten’ by Anthony H, right…lol

http://hanniballives.blogspot.com/2008/02/hannibal-lecter-biography.html

No not really. I know most Jellies’ genders. Many Jellies have gotten mine wrong, which surprised me.

@Dutchess_III And you didn’t know I’m and Asian just with my name ;)

@dxs I always know you’re a man. And I was really surprised when I read a thread claiming that you were always mistaken for a woman. Haha!

Yeah I’m a guy. I didn’t mean to not mention that in my previous post.
Heck, my profile bio is based off of this.

@Mimishu1995 I assumed you were Japanese…? The word just sounds like Japanese. Sounds female, Japanese and you’re 18 years old?
Also…we aren’t supposed to say “Asian” to describe people. I have no freaking idea why, but I got jumped for using “Asian” to describe someone with Oriental features. Wait. We aren’t supposed to say “Oriental” either. Sigh.

@Dutchess_III I thought she was Vietnamese? I call her Thuy Nguyen in my head..lol

Why can’t we use Asian like Caucasian, as a general descriptive when origin is unknown?

Hell if I know! Got jumped on here for mentioning that someone is Asian! Got jumped for mentioning someone is black. Got jumped for calling a Native American an Indian for short. Got jumped for wondering whether someone was male or female (“What does it matter????”)

‘Scuse my language but…it’s so fucking stupid!

So @Mimishu1995, what’s the verdict? :D

@Dutchess_III Wow, that’s a lot of jumping, girl. I just tell them to go suck eggs, I’m not havin it…lol

@Mimishu1995 Như vậy là bạn việt?

@Dutchess_III Hey, no fucking swearing. We’ll nail your ass for that.

Heehee, no one, as of yet, has protested that I frequently refer to you lot as yanks.
Although I suspect that’s about to change :D

I noticed, but I don’t get it lol.

Just don’t call us limey’s

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4IXmHqPWxUw

Lol…well I’m the only one here haha.

Yeh, so shut ya phukin mouth Canadian :D

…you talkin’ to me? lmao

@ucme “Yanks?” You need to check your racism at the door.

Well hush ma perdy mouth!

@ucme This is the only part I have trouble with….

Outside the United States, “Yank” is used informally to refer to any American, including Southerners.[1]
Wiki

So listen up you crumpet-sucking wanker! (I’m trying to playfully insult you with Brit-speak.)

@KNOWITALL Crumpet can also refer to a sexy girl, so yeah, I guess I am a crumpet sucker :)

@ucme hahaha, so what are some good British insults? You know I love this game, it’s the first thing I learn in most languages…lol

THE BRITISH ARE LEAVING! THE BRITISH ARE LEAVING! YAY!!!!

@KNOWITALL Yeah, we had this conversation once already :D
Now then, lemme see, a good British insult…David Cameron?

@Dutchess_III Haven’t you got somewhere you gotta be, like grazing in a field? ;-}

The book Trainspotting was always a good source of British vocabulary, although the book takes place in Scotland. Although short of calling people cunts, or biscuit ersed wankers, it’s not too colorful in trying to expend one’s knowledge on insults lol.

But it was in that book that I learned the word fag is used for a cigarette, and faggot is for a log of wood. So if you’re some anti homosexual jackass and you go to England and use the word fag for that, it might be confusing. (one I know that they use is buftie boy, again, from Trainspotting.) Although I’ll stand corrected if any of this information is wrong, or a Scotland thing only.

Disclaimer; because this is Fluther, I am not saying I do not like homosexuals and am not insulting them, merely talking about slangs, terms and language differences, thank you very much.

If a slightly overweight woman is being unpleasant to you then call her a tubby little titwitch

Lmao, titwitch.

This is a little British slur page…lol

http://www.rsdb.org/race/british

Haha, that’s like a garden party at buck house with the queen, all very polite & porsh, gets way worse.

Lolwut, I’ve never heard anyone in Québec use the word bloke for an English speaker. What is used here for that is ’‘square head’’, or tête carré, in French. I thought bloke was a British thing.

Although I’m guessing the bloke thing is associated to the French word block, again referring to squares, as in square heads.

I read somewhere today & I shit you not, new words were accepted in the Oxford English Dictionary…cunty, cuntish & cunted :D
http://jezebel.com/cunty-cuntish-cunted-and-cunting-added-to-oxford-engl-1543768870
^^ Evidence

Well it was only a matter of time, as the word fuck has been in the dictionary for ages. I think whatever becomes prominent words, even if only in a few places, eventually make it to the dictionary.

I can hear the queen now, “One is cunting delighted to launch this cuntish ship”

The word ’‘nosferatu’’ is in the dictionary, and that was a bastardized version of a Greek word made up by Bram Stoker. Historians can’t even agree on what Dracula’s actual name was, yet nosferatu is now a legitimate word meaning vampire or undead, lol.
You know, in case ’‘vampire’’ wasn’t enough. Might as well just say that strigoi is now an English word.

@Symbeline I like both of those words, fun sounds…lol

Haha yeah, strigoi is fun to say if you roll the R.

Sooner or later we tend to figure out other members genders.
I am 100% hetero female….no need to hide this fact, who cares if others know my gender?
I don;t care if you’re a spotted Hyena as long as you can spell and have a personality that surpasses that of a dish towel. lol

Sorry for being late for the show.

@Dutchess_III I assumed you were Japanese…? The word just sounds like Japanese.
I’m Vietnamese. I have learned Japanese for 2 months now and I can ensure to you that “mimishu” sounds nothing like Japanese. It sounds more like Chinese. It’s just some name I picked up from somewhere years ago.

@KNOWITALL I call her Thuy Nguyen in my head..lol
You can call me Thuy Nguyen if you like ;)

Như vậy là bạn việt?
Are you trying to say “bạn là người Việt Nam à?” LOL

@Mimishu1995 LOL, I make my own associations in my mind with jellies here.
Are you in the states or beautiful Vietnam?

Oh Hai @Mimishu1995! Can I call you Thuy Nguyen In My Head too?

@Dutchess_III Hmmmm, well Thuy was one of my besty’s in hs.

My first real boyfriend’s (innocent of course) name was Nguyen Cao Nguyen, I am pretty in love with the Vietnamese culture and people even all these years later.

@KNOWITALL you used to mention that Vietnamese boyfriend someday in one of your posts, so I’m not surprised that you wrote a Vietnamese sentence. And glad you like my country. Come visit Vietnam someday :D

And “Nguyen Cao Nguyen”, is that “Nguyễn Cao Nguyên”? That’s nice because “cao nguyên” means “highland” in Vietnamese.

@Dutchess_III Whatever you like :)

And lol Vietnamese English!

I’ve been on and off of this site for four years now, and there are still users I’m not sure whether they’re male or female. Maybe it’s just the nature of the user base this site attracts, progressive in nature and not as concerned about gender identity as much as other issues.

The last part of your question though ‘Female Woman Forever’, I don’t know, but it made me laugh so hard that I spit my tea all over my keyboard after reading it! Paradox, Female Man Forever, LMAO! I needed that because I had a bad past week.

@Mimishu1995 Yes, the family lived close to us and we got pretty close. Of course I’m American so it wasn’t a permanent thing, but we’re all still friends, and I love their mom and dad very much. They went from Vietnam to their uncle’s place in Rome before coming here, because they worked for the government before the communists came. High-class family.

I dated another Vietnamese guy, Tuoc Lu, when I was older and he was a very nice man, too. Here in Missouri, all the Vietnamese come every year for Marian Days in Carthage, Mo, from Cali and Texas and all over the US, for a big Vietnamese festival, it’s really fun and lasts for a whole week – very cool!!

I have to use the online translator for Vietnamese since our keyboards don’t have the right inflection symbols..lol

I’m so happy you’re here!!! :)

@KNOWITALL And I’m so happy I’m welcomed here :)

I know a lot of Vietnamese are in the US, but this is the first time I’ve got to know a Vietnamese festival there.

And I have to use a special program to write Vietnamese :)

@Mimishu1995…. Ai cũng có thể viết một câu tiếng Việt! Nó gọi Google Translate!

Did you know that Vietnam has the most poisonous snakes in the world?! Like, a zillion people a year die from snake bite there! Learned that on NOVA last night. GET OUT

@Dutchess_III Ai cũng có thể viết một câu tiếng Việt, nhưng viết thế nào cho chuẩn là một chuyện khác lol.

And snakes don’t live in cities, or at least where I live :D

Đổ lỗi cho rằng trên Google!

Have you ever known someone who was bitten? Just curious. My sister was bitten by a cotton mouth once.

For those above talking about Loli…

Loli

Lolicon