When you go out to dinner with a group of friends, how do you divide the bill when it comes time to pay, and how do you handle it if some people drank and others didn't?

We each pay for what we ordered plus some to go toward the tip.

I’d ask for separate checks. Why make it complicated?

@livelaughlove21 Any server does consider separate checks complicating things, trust me. Some places don’t allow split checks anyway. I can elaborate on why if you care, but splitting checks complicates more than it helps. For the diner as well as the establishment.

I have no problem splitting evenly, tip included. I agree it’s the easiest way to go about it, and what goes around comes around so I don’t nickel and dime on a group dinner. Sometimes we play “credit card roulette,” in which every diner puts a card in a hat and one, two or three cards are pulled to be the paying diner. Sucks to be you, but again, what goes around comes around.

BRING CASH, not a card.

I drink!

I don’t mind splitting evenly. If I think we had more expensive items or more drinks, I’ll throw in extra.

It has been my experience that women tend to scrutinize the bill and pay only what they ordered plus a 15–20% tip. Men on the other hand tend to all throw money out there and the wait person gets a healthy tip.
I am always uncomfortable when I go out with the girls. I would prefer to be like the men and not worry so much about it. If we over tip is it really going to hurt us as much as it might help the server?

If I eat out with a large group, I am only willing to pay for what I ordered (and chip in toward the tip, as @Seaofclouds noted) unless otherwise arranged. My friends and colleagues are well aware that I keep a tight budget. I have never had anyone call me rude or inconsiderate for not paying their tab.

They also know that I do not drink. I will not pay for someone else’s drink in the same way that I would not expect them to pay when I indulge in dessert.

@GloPro I’ve been a server before, and there’s nothing complicated about splitting up a bill for a server that knows how to do his/her job, and you tell them that’s the plan from the beginning. You simply assign the guests a number in the POS system, keep track of who orders what (which you should be doing anyway), and print out the checks. The only time this would complicate things is if there were shared food – an appetizer, for example. A lot of restaurants can split that evenly between separate checks, but when my husband and I go out with another couple, we usually tell the server to put any shared foods on our check unless someone beats us to the punch. I also tip well, so if they think it’s a hassle to split up the checks, they’ll be compensated for it and it’ll save us from that stupid, “okay, how much is our portion?” “did you have the…?” conversation.

I don’t carry cash anyway.

I’m with @muppetish. I don’t have extra money and I don’t drink. I usually order something simple off the menu and skip dessert. I don’t split the check.

I’ve mostly stopped eating out with friends and have stopped celebrating birthdays in restaurants. It’s just too expensive.

@livelaughlove21

“You simply assign the guests a number in the POS system….”

Am I correct in guessing that POS has no scatological reference in your above usage?

We add up the items we ate, then multiply by 1.27 – 100% is what we purchased, 20% goes toward the tip, and 7% is the sales tax in NJ (so the last digit would vary depending on taxes where you are dining). Drinks are so frikkin’ expensive these days, I do mind splitting the check evenly if some are drinking and others are not.

everyone pays separately.

@Brian1946 Yes, you would be correct. :) POS = point of sale; the type of system most restaurants/bars/etc. use to input orders.

I have no problem asking the server to provide separate cheques – that’s their job, they should be able to handle it. In a large group of people, most want to split a single bill – but the larger the group, often the more individuals want a separate cheque, either because of the alcohol issue or because they want to leave early. At least one other person is going to appreciate a separate bill.

I’ve taken to asking the server for separate cheques when he/she arrives at the table, rather than waiting for the server to suggest it or for someone else to do it (or fail to do it). It just saves confusion.

If the bill arrives, and we’re all on it, I’ll calculate what I owe, then leave a generous tip. I’m good at math, it’s not that big a deal.

I keep it simple: Add 20% tip to the total, then divide evenly by the number of people.

I don’t care if you’ve had a couple drinks and I only drink water. We’re all friends (or at least friendly) – I’m not gonna nickel and dime you. Granted, everyone I associate with are moderate to non-drinkers.

In fact, if you snatch up the bill and start giving me a line-item breakdown of what everyone had, I’ll probably never go out to dinner with you again.

And frankly, if you ask for separate checks, I may just beat you with a breadstick.

sigh I wasn’t going to get into it, because it’s off topic, but here is a little behind the scenes.
YES, it is your server’s job to make your dining experience a great one. NO, it isn’t rocket science to split checks. That being said… If you choose to enter randomly assigned numbers for your customers that are not aligned with table numbers the expo position cannot deliver your food for you because they no longer know where it goes. If you choose to ring in each person separately or as a couple then the kitchen gets those as separate tables and do not line up cooking times so that everyone’s food comes out at the same time. If all drinks are rung the same way the bartender also does not make all drinks at the same time, and again, without using table numbers no one can deliver them for you. The result is that the customers unknowingly created the discombobulated dining experience they attribute to poor service (and dock the tip), and poor kitchen service. This isn’t usually a problem when it’s just two couples, but the more splits the worse your dining experience may be because you are throwing kinks in a teamwork chain of events. Restaurants don’t refuse to split checks because they’re assholes. They refuse because your dining experience will benefit from you not interfering with a well oiled machine. Large groups are not a problem. Split checks are a problem.
Servers can split it out at the end of the meal, if you are willing to wait for her to have the process overseen and approved by her manager, which can take several minutes. Customers then get irritated at the wait and again will often punish the server for their wait time. Once 10 separate checks are delivered, pull out your 10 credit cards and wait 10 times as long for them all to be run. I hope the server doesn’t have any other tables, because splitting your checks not only cut off the opportunity for expos and bartenders to help serve food and drinks, but now she’s running 10x’s the credit cards while every other customer waits for her. She’s working her ass off.

YES, it is your right to split checks. But please consider how that is impacting the entire restaurant. Just because you are willing to be a considerate person, and that’s it. For that reason you should also consider bringing cash if you intend to split.

Although your patronage is very appreciated, it is appreciated even more when diners try to be accommodating, too. We’re all in it together with the same goal: for you to have a nice dinner.

I haven’t been a server for years, but I still am considerate of not making things extra hard for everyone.

The last large group (32) I ate out with, I did the inviting, so I paid the bill. The servers got a hell of a tip from the rest of the group.

If there was no one instigating the party, I would ask for separate checks. Most would be couples, so a group of 12 would generate 5–8 tickets and I don’t consider that onerous for the server.

It really depends on what group I am with. If I am with friends whom I know are watching their money, I will be more inclined to each pay for what we ordered and then throw in for the tip. If I am with other friends whose income is similar to mine, we usually split. Some friends and I will alternate treating if it is just a glass of wine or a casual meal. I’m pretty comfortable with all these ways. I do feel if someone has ordered a very expensive meal or drunk significantly more than others, it behooves them to at least offer to throw in more cash to the pot.

@GloPro Old people are the worst at splitting checks. I saw a group of 6 couples ask for separate checks, after they ordered. I’m not wasting my time and the servers on something so petty. I pay my fair share, if you want to sponge go out with someone else.

Mostly we evenly split the bill but if one person or couple really tipped the scales with their food order and or number of drinks we would evenly split the bill and the splurgers would agree to cover the tip.

We work it out before ever entering the restaurant. Usually, one party pays and the other picks up the tip, and we’ll switch next time out. Sometimes we get a split check.

No matter what, though, the designated driver eats and drinks (coffee/cola/smoothies) free.

Usually if people are drinking they throw in more money. I think they should. It depends also if it is a group of many, say 6+ people or just two of us. The more the people, the more I think the drinkers should be responsible for their extra amount. If it evens out because I ordered steak and they ordered a salad, then that’s fine just split the bill. I don’t worry about a dollar here and there, but alcohol can be a fortune.

Funny, in NY, MD, and FL we always get the bill and split it among ourselves, or one person picks up the whole thing. In NC and TN the waitperson often automatically brings separate checks, or asks if we want separate checks. As I think about it, they don’t do it if I am with my husband, they ask if I am with another girl, or we are 3 or more people.

All of us pay our own ways, individually.

My share of the bill is the menu price of what I ordered times 1.08875 for sales tax.

Plus I usually tip 20%. So typically I just multiply by 1.28875 by the face menu value of what I order, maybe rounding up to the nearest dollar if I pay cash.

If possible, I try to always get my own check because most people aren’t especially generous tippers and I just end up subsidizing their meals. They can work it out among themselves.

We have a couple that we eat out with on a regular basis and that makes it simple…we just take turns getting the bill and we either throw down on the tip or I get it.

I’m embarrassed by cheapskates and some people I know are convinced you do not have to tip on the drink portion of the bill. If I ate, I expect the tip to exceed 15% unless the service is crappy.

I have a couple of bartenders that give me free drinks. I always tip them a dollar per drink, even for the free ones. I get really good service.

Largely depends on the person I go with.

I have a friend who love night hanging out. When we finish dinner, we just ask for the bill then divide the total amount of money into half (everyone has to pay the equal amount of money).

There is another friend who is extremely poor, and I’m always the one who has to pay :(

The others, we just pay whatever we order.

I always just get a separate check. It’s not really a big deal, as I’ve never gone out with more than a couple of other people (I don’t do large groups as I tend to get irritated more quickly the more people I’m with).

All of my friends are in a similar financial situation as I am. We have very little spare cash so on the rare occasion we go out for a meal we always pay for what we ordered and then each chip in a little for the tip. We split the bill ourselves rather than ask the waiter to do it.

Quite often, if I know that I have a meal with friends planned I will make sure some money is put aside for it weeks in advance and my budget is very small so I have to be careful what I order and can’t afford to pay towards someone’s drink or extra side order.

Add up in your head the approximate cost of your meal, drinks, tax, and tip. Then throw in about 30% more or round up to the next large bill. There’s always some cheapskate in the group who does their mental math like, “my salad was $8.50 and my two glasses of wine were $6.50 each. A twenty should do it!” I eat out rarely and treat it as a luxury. If you want to count pennies, you probably shouldn’t go to a restaurant in the first place.

I try to avoid people like this, but there’s always some friend of a friend in a large group who does that. As Jesus said, they’ll always be among us.

Or you can call in a professional tipper.

@Haleth You throw in an extra 30% on the total? The total total with the tax included? That’s a really big tip.

^ He’s making up for the cheapskate in the party.

I meant to write that I I agree with @Judi; men tend to be much more generous in a group situation. This happened at work for me too when we collected to get people gifts or some sort of donation. Men typically gave more, or complained less when doing the giving. It’s not always true, but I definitely saw that play out enough to notice.

@Seek_Kolinahr I’ll make up for a cheapskate to make sure a waiter gets a decent tip, but I don’t tip 30% as a typical thing. I usually tip 20%-ish before tax. With a group I calculate 20% on the total after tax and round a little, depending on the service. I rarely have a cheapskate in a group. Unless we count someone who is drinking alcohol and not paying their extra a cheapskate. Even that doesn’t happen often to me. I never drink and usually whoever I eat with puts in more money for their alcohol, although with a large group where everyone else drinks that can get overlooked.

We were talking about that the other day at work, because I asked this question of my coworkers. We said that men don’t even look at the bill, they just throw in twenties and the waitress will get a great tip. Women seem to scrutinize the bill (someone said that above) and tip accordingly.

@jca Even in the day of equal pay, and I do think the sexes are fairly equally paid at this point (for the life of me I still don’t know if those stats about pay and gender really take into account same job same work and what women and men are paid) it costs more to be a woman. We have less money in our pocket even if we get paid the same as the man working next to us. Make-up, hair, jewelry, tampons, doctor, nailpolish, I’m sure there is more.

I scrutinized the bill more carefully when I had less money, so I think that might play into it. I never was counting pennies and never took out a calculator, but, I was more careful whether I was putting in an extra dollar or not.

There is a massive difference between being a cheapskate and being financially hard up. I agree that cheapskates are annoying as hell (although, maybe if I was more of a cheapskate my financial situation would be better!) but I think, as long as you’re upfront about your situation with those you are eating with, at least in my experience, nobody really minds splitting!

Nearly always when I’ve dined with a group, the bar bill and the food bill were kept separate and only the food bill is divided equally. Other times, everyone pays for exactly what they ordered. Either way, everyone pays for their own drinks.