If a person were congratulated begrudgingly or out of sympathy, is that a genuine pat on the back or something else?

Pleasantries are the grease that keep the social cogs turning.

Would I congratulate someone without meaning it…hm.

If I’m put into a position where not saying anything would be awkward, yes. Otherwise, I would simply avoid the situation. If I congratulate someone I, that’s because I genuinely think they’ve earned it. I don’t get hurting people intentionally for no reason.

In my world like and respect are two distinct and separate areas of existence. I may not like someone but I always allow room to respect a person on merits of their talents, abilities and effort. What never fails to take me by surprise is when someone thinks I do not like them because we do not always agree…debate is one of the best forms of education I know of. I hated school because of the rigidity but I love to learn and debate is highly flexible and can be raucous! I love raucous!

No idea, maybe a sign someone is willing to open a door to communication? Thank them & see!

If…by chance…we’re talking hypothetically about congratulating at a pancake/lurve party @Hypocrisy_Central, then I’d say just take it as a “high five” after a big game.

You might not like the players on the other team, however the polite thing to do is to thank them for playing the game via a high five, maybe a head nod thrown in for good measure.

I no longer go to pancake parties, but am glad to see you make the 20K club ;)

Eh, he knows how I feel. :D

It may just be politeness, does that matter?

@Cruiser I get that same surprise from people. Mostly women, but people are surprised that I can completely separate one discussion for my like or dislike of someone. This is particularly true at work or in a business decision.
I don’t offer false support or apologies. I try to find something genuine to congratulate someone on. There is always something.

It depends, there is no pat answer.

I have done it out of a sense of obligation, I have done it out of sympathy and I have done it to be polite and because, although I truly did not care one way or the other, I thought they might appreciate the gesture.

If an achievement deserves a congratulations, it deserves it whether or not I’m personally fond of the person who has achieved it. If a person I loathed found a cure for cancer, I’d sure as hell congratulate them on it. :)