What do you fight about with your significant other?

Money and expenses would probably be number one.

What was your stupidest argument about?

We’ve been married for 23 years and we never argue and we never fight.

Fight? When I think of the word “fight” in regards to a relationship, I think of a couple screaming at each other and eventually storming off like children. My husband and I don’t do that. We do argue, but we don’t yell at each other.

When we argue it’s usually because I’m in a bad mood, I take it out on him, and he’s having none of it. Or he did something that I asked him a million times not to do, such as not rinsing off his damn spoon that he used for peanut butter. These arguments are usually short-lived and I get over it rather quickly.

I don’t know what our “worst” argument was. It was prior to our marriage, that’s for sure. Since I can’t name a worst one, I’ll give you the most recent one. I recently started lifting heavy (for me) weights and he asked me if he could run me through his routine because he thought I’d like it. I agreed, but I ended up hating it. After 4 exercises that all worked my chest (bench press, incline bench press, chest press, and something else), I told him I was done. He got kind of huffy with me like I was giving up because it was hard instead of putting in some effort. Since then, he’s realized that his workout routine sucks and he’s doing way too many isolation exercises. He apologized for being hard on me and agreed that it was too much. We’re now doing the StrongLifts 5×5 together, no arguments.

I argue with him about falling asleep on the couch each night, and he argues with me for saying “are you sleeping or are you watching this?” every night. Pretty dumb and we’re not really mad, just poking at each other for fun.

@KNOWITALL Oh, I didn’t even consider including fake just-for-fun arguments. We do that a lot. We’re actually really mean to each other. We like to do childish things like call each other stupid and we’ll occasionally say things like, “Could you shut up? Because your voice is going through my head like a knife.” Good times. :)

@livelaughlove21 Oh yeah, our neighbors will fight and we can hear them sometimes, so we jokingly scream “Take out the trash- I said NOW” or he’ll say “Get your ass in there and do the dishes woman”, just hoping someone hears us. Yep, good times.

We don’t really fight…

We have our disagreements every so now and then, but I cannot recall what they were about, nor that there was a theme. They certainly didn’t turn into a fight.

Sorry…

Ohhh… And we’re married for fifteen years in a month from now, have two eleven year old kids and recently moved from Holland to the middle east.
Enough stress to act as a catalyst, I promise you.

Pretty much anything. Depends on our stress and crankiness level. The serious fights are about money and expenses. I think our most petty disagreement was about keeping the fold at the top of the blankets when you get in bed. I prefer the fold, so the sheet and blankets don’t cover my face. He likes to unfold it and make a mess. We’re both short tempered and easily squabble. Luckily, we’re also quick to forget about it and move on. They’re more of a stress reliever for us.

We recently went from a queen size bed to a California king. It is huge. Now, we push the other and (jokingly) complain that they are on side. This used to be a real squabble in the smaller bed during warmer months when it was too hot for touching.

When I think about it, we squabble a lot about the bed. I can’t sleep in an unmade bed. He un-tucks the sheets at the bottom of the bed. What a nightmare! lol

If we are both well rested and low on stress, we never fight.

But when we are under-slept and stressed, we each get cranky which leads to fights about the stupidest shit.

The biggest arguments we get in is over money, so I try to avoid bringing it up.

The most insignificant is his disorganization. I swear, if it wasn’t for me he could be on that show “Hoarders.” Fortunately he is in control of only one room and it is a WRECK.

We fight over the remote and what temp to set the thermostat at. Epic battles that often draw blood.

His family. My husband’s parents are self-absorbed bullies, his older brother has borderline personality disorder, and his younger brother had a violent temper and married a sociopath. Younger brother and the “charming” wife have raised teenaged sociopaths, twin girls, in the mold of their mother.

No, I’m not exaggerating. I understand that Paul loves his family, flaws and all, so I try to be civil while staying as far away as possible. Yet, Paul wants me to be closer to everyone.

Today is the bratty twins’ birthday. I sent them each a nice gift. I don’t expect to be thanked.

@Cruiser Yeah, the thermostat is a big one. I get so frustrated, especially during the winter. I want it set at about 58 at night BECAUSE WE HAVE A HEATED WATERBED!! We don’t need the house heated! He wants it at 68 or higher. He whines about having to get up in the middle of the night, in the cold and into a cold bathroom. Wah wah. I have to go into a cold bathroom too, AND SIT on a cold seat! I finally told him he just needed to suck it up. For some reason, we haven’t argued about it since.

@SadieMartinPaul I have somewhat similar issues with his kids too. It doesn’t come up.

Fight, argue, and disagree, are the same to me. I do think fight carries with it a feeling of more explosiveness, but how disagreements are handled have more to do with personalities and not how extreme or important the disagreement is in my opinion.

Our ongoing annoyed-ness with each other is he gets annoyed I don’t keep the house neater and I am a little disorganized. He also gets frustrated with my all too often inability to make a decision and move on. I constantly get annoyed that he cannot adjust his schedule easily when he already has a plan. If he planned on doing XYZ on Saturday (none of which are life altering or urgent) and someone invites us last minute to have lunch who we both would love to see, he will say no, because X and Y were planned for that time slot. Drives me crazy! He is better now than when we were first married, but the theme still continues to some extent. He is very work before pleasure oriented, which in many ways is a great thing, but sometimes the work really is not necessary to do at the scheduled time.

His parking drives me NUTS! He’ll spend 10 minutes driving around the Walmart parking lot, rejecting one perfectly good parking spot after the other! He also backs up when ever he gets half a chance. You know that commercial where the guy carefully backs up, and carefully maneuvers his car into the spot, then the shot widens to show a 5 acre, EMPTY parking lot? I tease hubs that they made that commercial just for him!

@Dutchess_III My whole beef is that she wants it at 72 in the winter and I say that is insane push it to 67 and then in the summer she insists the airconditioning be set at 67 cause 72 is “toooo hoooot”

Ha ha! Funny how that works, isn’t it @Cruiser. I’ve noticed the same thing. Setting the thermostat at 72 in winter is NOT the same as 72 in the summer. In fact, I think I asked a question about that some time back. Or, at least I meant to.

CORRIE IS COMING INTO TOWN AND ASKED ME IF I’D WATCH THE TWINS TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@cruiser LOL. Thermostat fights are very common. It’s one of the things I figure gay couples have fewer quarrels about. Although, 67 in the summer?! I keep my air on 77.

So….well, I think it depends not so much on the sex of the person, but on how financially savvy they are. I want to keep the thermostat down so the dang utility bill isn’t so high. He wants to keep it up so he won’t be the least bit uncomfortable if he gets up for 60 seconds in the middle of an 8 hour night. And I’M the one who is cold blooded. But I’ll ghetto layer before I turn p the thermostat.

@JLeslie Heehee, I’m a little like your husband in that whole planning/ spontaneity issue. I’m a planner and I like to stick to the plan, I have loosened up a bit myself over the years with my husbands help though.

@JLeslie there is no way in hell I am sleeping with a comforter in the summer to try and stay warm!

We’ve never been in a screaming at each other fight. I don’t think either of us are really the kind of people to start fights about stupid things.
The closest we get is when one of us is grumpy and will snap at the other person for just one second, and then apologize immediately. If we’re in a bad mood, we try to give each other space if we need it.

@Cruiser LOL. If I could sleep comfortably I would, but at 67 I am freezing and can’t sleep, and can’t move period. We used to keep our heat on 68 and I regret every day I had it set that cold. It was a “fight” for my husband and me, because I did a lot of complaining about being cold and it annoyed the shit out of him. I think it influenced him seeking employment again in FL. I wasn’t really complaining about the cold outside, although I like the 80 degree weather better, I was complaining about being cold inside. In my home. In the place that I should feel comfortable. I have told him I will never ever again be cold at home. Now I put the heat on 73, I wish I had done that the 10 years I lived as a married person in colder weather. Once in a while I would move to the guest room, close the doors, and heat it up with a space heater so I could fall asleep. It probably got up to 80 in there.

To @Dutchess_III‘s point, I was “cheap” about it. Heat is expensive. My mom and dad are the reverse of my generalization about women being cold, my mom is the one who is always hot, she was born hot. She is hot and then she always dresses in layers. My dad is overweight so layers are uncomfortable for him, and he is always cold and uncomfortable. They have the money to raise the heat, but my mom is stubborn. She really pisses me off about it, because I feel for the discomfort my dad is always in, when it is completely unnecessary.

My last house I boarded off half the house with blue Tyvek styrofoam boards. Yup, come in my house and the stairs were blocked with the stuff. I had thick plastic hanging in the hall to my bedroom. My big beautiful French country home in the woods with hardwood floors, stone fireplace, and all other sorts of pretty upgrades had plastic hanging like a warehouse. I hated the waste of heating the huge house. This new house I am putting a door in the hall to separate the house into two wings so I can just heat where I am.

I never want to fight with my husband again about the temperature. Thank goodness we are comfortable within a few degrees of each other and it is easy to put on long sleeves or change to a tank top to accomodate the other person.

If I had my druthers, I would block every room off except the living room.

@Dutchess_III I thought about putting in three zone instead of two, but since we are in FL, the cold months just last three months, and are not very cold but for a few weeks a year. People think I am nuts to worry about heating the house at all in FL. They can take a flying leap.

I remember the first heating bill we ever had when we moved to NC many years ago. Over $300. We could not believe it. In TN I had a neighbor who paid as much as $700 in utilities during the cold months. $700! I would die. Her house was the same size as mine, but three kids. That bill was all utilities. Mine was $400 at the highest of highs. A fortune in my mind. My other neighbor had a house 1,000 sq ft less and their winter bills were easily $100 a month more than mine.

A couple of years ago, during the winter, my husband left home for about 6 weeks, to care for his father who was in the hospital. It was during the coldest part of the winter…and my utility bill dropped by about $75.00. Because my husband wasn’t there. It was $165 for that month. Lowest it’s been for that time of year since he moved in.

@Dutchess_III That’s a big difference.

It is. We have a fireplace that he and my son installed about 8 years ago. It’s nice, when it’s burning, but when it’s not it’s a HUGE utility waste. We can close the damper, and close the glass doors too, but….might as well drill a hole the size of a penny in the wall to the outside. Can’t close the damper when we go to bed because the fire is still smoldering. In THAT case, might as well drill a hole the size of a bowling ball in the wall! When he was gone I secured a blanket around the whole thing and never burned it. That was probably the biggest savings. That and turning the thermostat down to 50 every night because…WE HAVE A HEATED WATERBED!!!

This is why I am not putting in a fireplace. I guess you can get a no vent fireplace? I was shocked to see many of the houses in Tampa have fire places. In southeast FL you almost never see one. Such a waste in my opinion. Makes the house less airtight, the builders charge a fortune to put one in. No thank you.

I have flannel sheets for my bed in the winter, it makes a big difference.

Well..I’m divorced, but…when I was married the issues, ( big stuff aside ) were primarily around my ex being a super anal/OCD control freak and me being easy going and free spirited.
He didn’t like me rearranging the house, ( something I love to do once or twice a year ), he had major issues with how I built a fire, ( I used too much paper and kindling, he was a 3 sticks of kindling and 2 sheets of paper guy and I was a 6 sheets of paper and 10 sticks of kindling kinda girl haha ) and once, even complained that I “displaced” the gravel when I drove up the driveway. WTF! lol
We fought about my animals, I am a major animal lover and he was not.

He was very narcissistic and jealous of my pets and even over the attention our daughter needed in her younger years. He actually admitted this once and I was floored…jesus, talk about having 2 babies.
Once, it was so funny, a neighbor of ours, a realtor, really liked my creative style and decorating and I told him that my ex got upset if I moved things around. The neighbor said, right in front of my ex ” Well…as long as you don’t go blind what’s the big deal? ” haha

How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her?

Gave her a waffle iron to read.

LOL! No. They rearranged the furniture. :)